I think by issues he means environmental issues. As socially progressive as Norway is, the country has done a lot of harm to the environment with fishing practices and whaling and it’s something I care deeply about. Maybe too deeply. I’m not sure how well a dinner will go if I get all passionate and heated and start yelling at the King and Queen about their policies. I may be shy and quiet ninety-nine percent of the time but when there’s something that gets under my skin, I’m hard to shut up.
Schnell clears his throat and goes on. “We’ve already booked a flight for you and Lady Jane tomorrow afternoon from Edinburgh to Oslo. You will be picked up at the airport by one of their men and taken straight to the palace. You are to wear something demure and appropriate for the occasion. Buy something today if you have to but do make sure you look your best. You’re representing Liechtenstein after all.”
“Okay,” I tell him, though it’s kind of weird to have old Schnell give me advice on how to dress. Though maybe I need it. I glance down at my fluffy black cardigan and ripped jeans. Not exactly the regal look.
“Your father will call you directly after the dinner,” he says. “Take care now, madam, and do reach out to me if you have any questions.”
“How do I reach out if your number is private?” I quickly ask, but it’s too late. He’s already hung up.
I stare at the phone in disbelief for a few moments, trying to wrap my head around what just happened.
Why on earth would I be invited to dinner at the Norwegian palace? It doesn’t make any sense at all. I’m…nobody. Honestly. And though sometimes I wish I had a bigger voice about the issues I care about—hence why I’m going to university—I kind of like the fact that beyond this campus, no one knows who I am. I shouldn’t be on any monarchy’s radar whatsoever.
Unless I’m being used as some sort of chess piece in some inter-country power play. Since I was sent away from my own family and country at an early enough age, I was never fully immersed in the politics and goings on that surround my father and the thirty-seven thousand people that he represents. Could it be there’s something that either my father wants from Norway or vice versa?
Paranoia doesn’t suit me, but I can’t help thinking that’s more than likely the reason for all this. Still, that doesn’t change the fact that I’m going, and now I’m more curious than ever. Perhaps I’ll be an unwitting spy.
First things first though—I need a dress, and there isn’t much time to get one. I’ve never skipped class before, and I feel guilty for doing so, but these kinds of opportunities never come up for me, and it’s not like I can say no to my father when he never asks me to do anything.
Instead of texting Jane, I turn around and run back through the rain all the way to my dorm. I shuffle down the hall, the wet soles of my shoes squeaking across the floor, and then knock on Jane’s door.
It takes her a moment to open, and when she does, she’s peering at me suspiciously.
“It’s me,” I tell her. “I need to talk to you.”
“I know it’s you, I’m not blind,” she says, opening her door wider so I can come in. “Why aren’t you in class?”
“I have news,” I tell her as I step into her closet-sized room.
“Why are you so wet?”
I run my hand over the top of my head, wincing at how soaked it is. “I forgot my umbrella. And I’m not going to class today. Instead, you and I are going to Edinburgh.”
“Edinburgh?” she exclaims loudly. I knew she’d get all excitable about this. She never keeps things very subtle.
“Yes. Now promise you won’t get all, you know, loud about this,” I warn her, putting out my palms as a way of calming her before she can start.
“I’m not loud,” she says extra quietly.
I give her a steady look. “Anyway,” I go on, “Schnell called me. Just now on the way to class.”
“Oh my god, is everything all right!?” she cries out, hand to her chest.
“Jane,” I warn her. “This is you. Being loud. This is what loud is. And yes, everything is fine, don’t worry. It’s just that he called with an unusual request on behalf of my father.”
“Why didn’t your father call?”
“You know why.”
She narrows her eyes. Even though my father is the one who pays her salary, I know Jane doesn’t like him. Her personality with his is like oil and water.
“What does he want?” she asks.
“Well,” I say, taking in a deep breath, “it seems I’ve been invited to dinner tomorrow night at the royal palace in Norway.”
She stares at me for a few moments before she goes, “Say what? You’re not pulling my leg, are you?”
“Someone might be pulling mine, but I’m still going. Both of us are. Tomorrow we fly out of Edinburgh for Oslo. I need something to wear—I assume you do too, unless you’ve got some fancy dress in your closet here”—I pause to glance at the closet by her bed which looks like it holds maybe three hangers—“so I thought we would just head to Edinburgh right now and get some shopping in.”
She’s still staring at me with the same blank expression as before. I stare right back at her, brows raised, waiting for some sort of explosion. “Why?” she asks.
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s some horrible joke my brothers are playing on me. Maybe I’ll go there and no one will be there to pick me up. Though my brothers would first have to know I exist before that could happen…”
“Bloody hell,” Jane exclaims breathlessly, her eyes growing wider by the second. “You’re serious.”
“When am I not?”
“We’re going to an actual royal palace!”
“You act like you’re not the lady-in-waiting to an actual princess,” I remind her stiffly. “You’ve seen the palace I grew up in.”
“And you know that it’s not the same,” she says, clapping her hands together. “Your family’s palace is a castle fit for Count Dracula. That’s what happens when you have only men ruling your country. Oh, if only my mum could see me now. She was so bloody obsessed with all royal families, the type to collect every single mug and collector plate she could get her hands on. Ooooh,” she goes on, “maybe the Prince will be there!”
I roll my eyes and shudder. “Ew. I hope not.”
Jane recoils at that and gawks at me like I have two heads. “Prince Magnus? What’s your problem with him?”
Ugh. Don’t get me started. Maybe it’s because I’ve only been mercilessly teased by those types back in boarding school (princesses are an easy target), I have no patience for men who act like boys or think with their dicks, and it seems like Prince Magnus of Norway is nothing more than a glorified playboy with a fancy title. All I ever see when I flip through the blogs and news is him racing motorcycles or hooking up with a new socialite.
Now there’s a sex video floating around of him and the prime minister of Norway’s daughter, which seems like bad news all around, though I shouldn’t be surprised at the lengths that people go to for more and more fame. “He just seems like an idiot. That stupid smug smile I always see, like everyone wants him or wants to be him. And flaunting all those women around. I mean, hello, who the hell makes sex tapes anymore unless it’s for attention? Yeah right, it was accidently leaked.”
She chuckles. “Believe me, I don’t think he did that for attention. He has enough of it already.” She pauses, a strange gleam in her eyes. “Have you watched it?”
I scrunch up my nose. “God, no. Why would I?”
She shrugs and looks away.
“Jane,” I say slowly. “Have you?”
Her head tilts and she’s unable to hide her smile. “Maybe.”
“Ugh, you’re supposed to be refined, Jane.”
“I am refined!” she yells, her round cheeks going pink. “I just have a healthy dose of curiosity.” She pauses. “It’s going to be hard having dinner with him after I know what he looks like naked. How he moves…the man has skills, Ella. Skills you need to see.”
I raise my palm. “Please, please stop talking. I don’t share my…sex life with you.”
“This isn’t my sex life,” she says with a snort. “It’s his sex tape and it’s all over the news. And need I remind you that you can’t share your sex life with me if you don’t have one.”
I turn around. “This is getting wildly inappropriate.”
“Sometimes you need to get inappropriate,” she calls after me as I head over to the door, my shoes sloshing as I walk. “It would do you some good!”
I open the door and look over my shoulder. “With any luck he won’t even be there so I don’t have to be embarrassed over my lady-in-waiting drooling over the Crown Prince and picturing him naked. I’m going to pack and I’ll come back here in an hour. Just promise me when I do you keep your head out of the gutter.”
She gives me a grave nod, standing up straighter, and I know there will be no promises. Sometimes it feels like I’m the one keeping Jane in line and not the other way around. This time though, I know the both of us have no idea what to expect.
For once I’m going to have to put on my princess face and act like I belong.
Four
Magnus
When I was younger, I was the world’s shittiest student. It explained why going to university after high school was never even on my radar. What was the point when everything to do with studying bored me to tears? Besides, even if there was something I was interested in, the testing system was always designed to make me fail. Every time I sat down to take a test, it didn’t matter how well I knew the subject, I totally froze. I couldn’t decide on the right answer for the life of me. Everything I knew went out the window and my mind went a million other places instead. As a result, I flunked.