There You Stand (Between Breaths 5)

My stomach muscles clenched when Jude’s fingers slipped around to loosely grip the front of my T-shirt. I felt his harsh breath on my neck. “Let’s get out of here.”

I pulled onto the side street and stopped at the red light that intersected with the main road. “Where to?”

“Take a ride to the quarry.”

My head jerked back. “Isn’t it closed after dusk?”

“You afraid of getting caught?” His voice was rough and clipped. “Never done anything illegal?”

My back stiffened. “Have you?”

“You think I have,” he said. And now the last few days made sense. He knew I’d been having doubts about him. “So let’s leave it at that.”

I shook my head in frustration. “If you never fill in any blanks then I can’t help but make everything up in my own head. That’s what everyone in this town does, you get it?”

I felt heavy gusts of air against my nape and I attempted to hide the tremble that travelled across my skin.

“Fucking brilliant,” he mumbled. “Just drive.”

I gunned the gas harder than I’d intended and as we shot off his hands gripped my shirt even tighter. But he must’ve felt unsteady because his fingers sank further into my flesh down to the knuckles. My stomach muscles quivered and if he didn’t before, he could tell now how affected I was by having his hands on me.

My dick thickened against my zipper and I couldn’t help my thoughts from going there. To his fingers drifting down and grasping the front of my pants.

“Better hang on,” I said, trying to rid myself of this off-the-charts tension. “Have to get on the freeway until the next exit.”

His hands settled around my abdomen, one hand higher that than the other and I could feel his pulse thrumming through his fingers. Maybe he was as turned on as I was. Maybe he wanted this closeness as well. I felt him lean into the embrace and I adjusted myself on the seat so that his groin would settle flush against my thighs.

I heard an audible gasp and then his breaths were harsh against the middle of my back as he tucked his forehead between my shoulder blades. I definitely felt his stiff cock against my lower back and it was so validating, so damn arousing, that I nearly cut through my lip from biting down so hard.

I angled my head toward him. “The quarry, huh?”

No response, just a firm grip, his fingers nudging beneath my shirt to my skin. If he kept it up I was going to hurtle into the fucking ditch.

“True or false: You’re trying to kill me.”

A hot puff of air against my cheek. “You’re the one driving like a bat out of hell.”

I braced myself. Could I have been reading him wrong this entire time? But then I felt his thumb slide purposefully across the top of my waistband. Fine, I’d play his little game. Besides, he was at my mercy on this bike.

Off the exit I headed toward the national park. The quarry was located just inside and though you were allowed to ride through after dusk, you weren’t allowed to stop your vehicle. I had gotten caught a few times in my younger days, steaming up the backseat. Plenty of kids had. The idea of doing the same as an adult merely seemed pointless.

But now the thrill of driving through and parking with Jude felt clandestine and completely provocative. And what was with that illegal topic of conversation we had at the light? How could he not be doing something against the law if he was involved with the Disciples? And why was it that I didn’t care anymore? Was my lust for him blinding my decisions?

I couldn’t even muster up the brain cells to be concerned.

Which is probably why I got bold with my next question. “True or false: You like boys.”

He gulped a lungful of air. “I . . . I like you.”

Holy fuck, he actually admitted to something. “So you’re not gay?”

“I . . . I don’t know. I’ve never totally explored . . . Christ. I’ve been on the go for far too long.”

As I turned down the dark road heading toward the quarry I heard him mutter fuck under his breath as if he hadn’t meant to confess that much.

“Have you been with other guys?”

“Not really, I . . . bullocks. The truth is . . . yes, I have,” he said in a gravelly voice, as if remembering someone or something.

“Have you . . . enjoyed it?”

“Yes and no. It’s complicated.” Damn, what in the hell was he talking about? And then a thought rose up, flooding my chest with fear. Did it have anything to do with all those scars on his back? Shit.

I pulled into the empty lot while I mulled over his answer. I didn’t want him to feel on guard around me or to clam up, so I wasn’t going to press him about it. Him telling me felt organic to our ride and I’d rather it stayed that way.

I rolled into a space and came to a stop. Immediately I twisted toward him. “I’d never . . . I’d never do something to hurt you, Jude.”

His gaze met mine and held, heavy as steel fiber. His hand reached up and gently pulled the knit cap from my head. He ran his fingers through the top of my hair and pinpricks were ablaze across the entire landscape of my body.

I sighed into his touch and shut my eyes.

“Do you even know how hard it was to concentrate on the road with you sitting so close to me?” I mumbled.

“Couldn’t help myself.” He slid off the bike and looked around the lot, as if casing it for onlookers. His voice was gruff and I thought he sounded pissed, until I looked at him and a seductive smile lifted the corner of his lip. “Your skin is too tempting.”