‘But those women. I saw photos of you everywhere.’
‘Companions at galas and dinners. I didn’t take one to bed. How could I, when the only woman I wanted was you?’
Poppy’s mouth sagged open but no sound came out.
‘When we met again I was desperate for you. I almost exploded the first time you touched me. Why do you think we had sex against a wall and didn’t make it to a bed? For five years I’d been dreaming of you, wanting you.’ He stretched out his other hand and dared to feather a touch along her cheekbone. She felt like satin and warmth and home. Orsino’s belly cramped.
‘There’s no one but you for me, Poppy.’
Her eyes squeezed shut and he felt her shiver.
‘What changed your mind? Did you talk to Mischa when I left? Did he tell you we hadn’t slept together? You made it clear you didn’t believe me.’
Her words were terse. She thought he came to her now because Mischa had persuaded him of her innocence. That he didn’t have faith in her word alone. Who could blame her?
Orsino surged to his feet, nausea rising. It was his own fault. What reason did she have to trust him?
He turned away and braced himself on the railing. His head sagged and his breath came in ragged gasps.
He’d lost her. She’d gone beyond forgiveness.
‘Mischa didn’t tell me. The man hates my guts. You know he loves you?’ How could she not know? It was glaringly obvious.
‘He refused to tell me anything, especially where you were. When I asked him what had happened five years ago he told me I already knew.’
Poppy’s hissed intake of air was loud in the silence.
‘Either I believed what you told me or I didn’t. That’s when I knew. The answer had been there all the time if I stopped to think about you, the woman you really are.’
Orsino’s hands shook as he clenched the railing.
‘I’ve been wrong about you. I accused you out of fear.’
‘But you didn’t believe me when I told you in the chateau! You said it wasn’t possible.’
He shook his head. ‘I didn’t want to believe it because it meant I’d sentenced us to years of hell for nothing. How could I live with that? How could I have done that to the woman I loved?’ His whole body quaked. ‘You’re better off without me.’
Even as he said it a voice inside howled in despair. How could he move on without Poppy? He didn’t know how to let her go.
‘So you pushed me away instead.’ Pain threaded her voice and something died inside. She didn’t sound like a woman reunited with the man she loved. She sounded like a woman who’d had her fill of hurt. Because of him.
Light fingers brushed his cheek, smearing wetness.
‘Orsino!’ Shock pared her features to taut lines. ‘You’re—’
‘I haven’t cried since I was seven. I thought I’d forgotten how.’ His attempt at a laugh was pathetic.
Her eyes met his, deep violet and so beautiful he never wanted to look away. Till he saw the shadows of regret haunting them even now she knew the truth.
‘Oh, Orsino.’ Poppy leaned into him, her arms lifting as if to wrap around him, but he moved lightning fast, grabbing her wrists and holding her back.
‘No! Don’t feel sorry for me. I don’t want that.’ Selfishly he wanted so much more. ‘I’ve made mistakes that have cost us both. I don’t deserve your sympathy.’ He’d hurt her so badly, not once but twice. How could she trust him after he’d failed her like that?
For a pulse beat and another and another, their eyes held. He knew she read his regret and his determination.
Finally Poppy tugged her arms free.
That one movement destroyed something inside. He felt bereft. But what sort of man would hang on to her by playing on her heartstrings?
‘So now you know.’ Orsino cleared his throat and stepped away. ‘You deserved the truth before we go our separate ways.’
‘That’s what you want?’ Her voice was a raw whisper, her eyes huge.
He watched for any sign she felt more than pity and regret for his stupidity. He saw nothing but shock.
She said nothing about being in love with him.
Hope died. He released the breath he’d held, waiting to hear those three words she’d once shared so willingly. He’d finally managed to kill her feelings when he’d rejected her confession at the chateau party.
‘Are you ready to leave?’ he asked abruptly, needing to end this. ‘I’ll drive you wherever you want to go.’
She stepped back and a leaden weight crushed his heart. ‘No. I’ll grab a taxi.’
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
ORSINO FOLLOWED THE receptionist’s directions and stalked down the corridor to the conference room. His skin prickled just being in London’s Chatsfield Hotel after all these years. It reminded him of his father’s arrogant assumption that he’d drop everything to become the public face of the company.