‘What is this?’ he rasped through numb lips.
‘It’s the truth of what happened to your car that day, Rafael. You’re not responsible for your mother’s death.’
Shock hollowed his stomach. ‘No...it can’t be. Please tell me you’re not making this up in some attempt to make me feel less guilty.’
‘As your father, it’s my duty to comfort you when you feel bad. It’s also my duty to make you see the truth in front of your own eyes. You’ve been so bent on punishing yourself you’ve failed to listen to reason or contemplate the evidence. You told me when you first drove the car that you felt something wasn’t right. That’s what made your brother decide to investigate further. It turned out your hunch was right.’
‘It says here all fifteen models of that car have been recalled for the same error. But it doesn’t excuse the fact that I was running on fumes that day, high from partying even though my body was exhausted from being up almost twenty-four hours straight.’
‘All things you’d been doing since you hit late puberty. All those things combined, while it gave me nightmares as a father, didn’t make me think for a second that you would be dangerous behind a steering wheel or I wouldn’t have bought you such a powerful machine, and I certainly wouldn’t have allowed my beloved Ana in the car with you.’
The pure truth behind his father’s words hit him square in the solar plexus. He stumbled backward and sagged onto the ancient leather armchair.
‘I can’t...I don’t know what to say.’ His head dropped into his hands and he felt tears prick his eyes.
‘Let it go, Rafa. You’ve punished yourself enough over this. Your mamá wouldn’t want this for you.’
The sob choked him, hot and tight and cathartic. Once it started, he couldn’t seem to make it stop. He didn’t even have the strength to lift his head when he heard the haunting whine of his father’s wheelchair.
‘Enough, son...enough.’
He looked up through a mist of tears. ‘Forgive me, Papá.’
His father’s smile touched him in a way that went beyond the physical. ‘There’s nothing to forgive. There never was.’
Footsteps sounded and Marco walked in, cradling his son, with Sasha right behind him.
She stopped dead when she saw him, her eyes widening in disbelief. ‘Good grief, I never thought I’d live to see the day you’d be reduced to tears, Rafa. Quick, Marco, activate your phone’s camera. We’ll make a killing on YouTube.’
Marco laughed, their father snorted, even baby Jack chimed in with a hearty gurgle.
‘So, we’re all good here?’ Marco asked several minutes later, his grey eyes probing as they darted between his father and his brother.
Rafael’s gaze met his father’s and the unconditional love he saw made the tightness in his chest give way just a tiny bit further. ‘We’re getting there.’
He had a feeling he’d never get there completely. Not while he felt a part of himself still missing.
* * *
‘Pacing a crater through that carpet won’t make the next few hours of your life any easier. You’re screwed ten ways to Sunday. Accept that now and you’ll be fine.’
Rafael glared at the amusement on his brother’s face and clenched his fist. ‘Don’t you have an adoring wife somewhere who’s waiting for you to swoon over her?’ He walked over to the balcony overlooking the immense ballroom and scoured the crowd again, his stomach clenching when he didn’t spot the figure he sought.
‘Sí,’ Marco replied smugly. ‘But watching you twist yourself into knots is fun, too.’
‘Keep it up and I’ll be twisting my fist into your face.’
Marco grinned, an expression that had been rare in the years after his own personal tragedy of losing his unborn child. Sasha had brought the smile back to his brother’s face. A smile that was now rubbing him a dozen different wrong ways.
As if he knew he was skating close to the edge, Marco sobered. ‘If it helps, I messed up with Sasha, too.’
‘It doesn’t. Sasha is a soft touch. I’m not surprised she was fooled by those puppy-dog eyes of yours.’
Marco laughed. ‘You’re in more trouble than I thought if you’re that deluded.’ When his brother tapped him on the shoulder, Rafael was ready with a pithy response. Instead he saw Marco nod over his shoulder.
‘Your Armageddon is here. I’d wish you luck but I’ve always thought you were dealt more than your fair share at birth. So I’ll just suggest you don’t balls it up...’