‘The insect that bit you?’ Dante’s tone was incredulous.
Lowering the sheet, she took hold of his hand and moved his fingertips slowly over the rest of her scars. ‘I ran into a swarm of insects.’
He hissed through his teeth, but let her continue.
‘He beat me so much that eventually I fell out of bed, but not before he broke my nose.’ Touching it, she huffed a humourless laugh, remembering. ‘It wouldn’t stop bleeding so I had to go to the emergency room.’
‘Did he take you there?’
‘No. Of course not. I took myself. He said he was glad to be rid of me, and that I was a pathetic excuse for a woman. Narrow escape, huh?’ She tried to smile, but it didn’t come off. ‘While I was in the emergency room a nurse gave me a full exam. She said it was usual when there was so much bruising. It wasn’t just my nose,’ she added, quickly staring down to avoid Dante’s molten magma stare.
‘I told the nurse everything—how he’d tried with his hand, and even with a sex toy he’d bought. It was all a waste of time. I’d...closed up completely. I couldn’t understand what had happened to me, until the nurse explained that it’s a recognised medical condition. It can be due to physical causes, she told me, though in my case she thought it was more of a psychological reaction to losing the baby and then the violence of that night. She said it wasn’t something I could control, and that it would take time and therapy. She fixed me up with a therapist who told me I was lucky I hadn’t been raped.’ She glanced up. ‘That was the end of the therapist. I didn’t feel lucky. I felt dirty and ashamed.’
‘And now?’ Dante’s voice was gentle.
‘And now I shouldn’t be here,’ she said, changing her tone to bright and cheerful.
‘Because?’
‘Because now we both know that there’s something wrong with me—and that it could get in the way of our work here.’
‘There’s nothing wrong with you, Karina.’ Dante stated that with such certainty that she didn’t even try to resist when he drew her into his arms. ‘You’ve had one trauma after another, and have never given yourself a chance to recover. You’re too hard on yourself,’ he said, as he pulled back to stare into her face. ‘Sometimes it’s not possible to bounce back just because we decide it’s time. Sometimes we have to ask for help—even you, Karina.’ Holding her arms lightly, he brought her in front of him. ‘Do you want me to find some professional help for you?’
‘No!’ She recoiled at the thought.
‘You only have to say the word and I’ll arrange it with someone who knows what they’re doing.’
‘Sorry.’ Shuddering, she drew in a breath. ‘I don’t mean to sound ungrateful. It’s just that I’ve tried therapy and I know it doesn’t work for me. I honestly think it would set me back.’ She said nothing for a long time and then she looked at him. ‘Could you help me?’
‘I’m going to help you,’ Dante confirmed, as if there could be any doubt. ‘And I’ll do it by starting from scratch.’
‘What does that mean?’
‘We both know the clock is ticking as far as this event is concerned, so neither of us has the time to concentrate properly on anything else until it’s over.’
‘What are you saying Dante?’
Easing back, he lifted his shoulders in an easy shrug. ‘Whatever happens next will happen naturally, or it won’t happen at all.’
Fear of losing him swamped her as he left the bed. She watched him scoop up his jeans and tug them on, feeling she’d already lost him.
‘I’m going to leave you to sleep now.’ His face was set. His eyes were cool. ‘I’ll take one of the guest rooms. Tomorrow work on your report. When you’re finished, I’ll read it. Then we’ll have a meeting and decide where to go from here.’
He might even fire her, she thought. Her lips felt wooden as she commented lightly, ‘That sounds a bit cold-blooded.’
Dante’s stare steadied on her face. ‘It is.’
She had to tell herself that what he had suggested made perfect sense, but that didn’t stop a chill of apprehension rushing through her. Where would they go from here? Anywhere?
She would concentrate on the event to the exclusion of everything else, she told herself firmly. She would make it the best it could be. She would forget her worthy ideas and go full out for carnival at the Gaucho Cup. She got out of bed, making sure to wrap the sheet tightly around her as she swung her legs over the side. She gasped when Dante snatched the sheet away, leaving her completely naked.