Her mouth fell open on empty air as Tyr’s harsh words resonated around them. Her stomach curled with shame because what he said was true, and everything they had been to each other last night was obliterated in the stinging aftermath of those few destructive words. She’d told Tyr she loved him, but now she remembered he’d never said anything in return.
‘You’re right about this situation being thrust upon us,’ she agreed, relieved her voice sounded so steady. ‘And in case you’re in any doubt, I don’t like this situation any more than you do. How can I, when I’m tied to a husband whose attitude towards women is stuck in the Dark Ages?’
‘Not now, Jazz.’
She was ahead of him when Tyr reached the door and stood in his way. ‘You will listen to me,’ she insisted, thrusting her hands out to hold him off. ‘I’m not the helpless female you seem to think I am. I’m your equal in every way. Either we do this together, and I mean all of it, Tyr, the good bits and the bad, or you can forget this marriage.’
A long silence followed, then Tyr pulled back. ‘Wait there and calm down,’ he advised.
Jazz ground her jaw, but at least she didn’t say anything she might regret later. She leaned back against the door, grudgingly accepting that if she had followed Tyr inside, the emails he had to send would probably not be sent, and right now the desperately needed equipment was more of a priority than her pride.
After sending the messages he came outside. Jazz had moved from the door and was standing a few feet away. She was the first thing he looked for, her eyes the first destination he sought. She was still angry and who could blame her? Taking hold of her shoulders, he brought her in front of him. ‘Understand this, Jazz—I will never allow you to endanger yourself. Understood?’
She tipped her chin up. ‘And I will never allow you to face risk alone. Got that?’ She stared at him, unflinching. ‘And now it’s time for you to tell me everything, don’t you think?’
Releasing his hold, he stood back.
‘Don’t you dare say there’s nothing to tell,’ she warned as he shook his head.
‘This isn’t the place, Jazz.’
‘Oh? Where is the place? Shall we wait until we’re sitting round the boardroom table in Skavanga?’ Firming her jaw, she gave him such a look. ‘There is no right place, Tyr, but there is a right time, and that time is now.’
‘That piece of paper we signed? It might make us husband and wife, but it doesn’t give you the right to rifle through my mind.’
‘Coward.’
Jazz had always known exactly which of his buttons to press. ‘I’m a killer, Jazz. And I’m very good at what I do. Is that enough for you?’
She shook her head. ‘You’re a soldier and a hero who was following orders,’ she argued evenly. ‘You never could shock me, Tyr, so don’t even try that tactic with me. You don’t frighten me and I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying put until you tell me everything.’
‘You think I’m a hero?’ he flashed. ‘Is that what you think?’
‘That’s what I know. Sharif hasn’t kept all your secrets, so I know exactly what you did.’
‘Everything?’ he said scathingly.
‘Enough to know the man I married is a hero,’ Jazz said quietly. ‘Enough to know you rescued your battalion by risking your own life. And before you start trying to frighten me off with tales of how dangerous that makes you, let me ask you one simple question: Would a brother who adores me agree to our marriage if Sharif thought you were a dangerous man? Isn’t it more likely that Sharif loves you as he loves me, and that he believes somehow, and even I’m not even sure how, yet, that I can help you?’
He said nothing for the longest time, and then he voiced his haunting thoughts. ‘I can never forget the children’s faces.’
Reaching out for him, Jazz gripped his hand.
‘There are no age limits in war, Jazz. No sanitised battlegrounds where only adults hold a gun and only bad guys do the shooting.’
‘Don’t you think I know that, Tyr? But you have never stopped trying to help people. You haven’t given a thought to yourself. You’re a creator, not a destroyer, and now it’s time for you to think about rebuilding your own life, when you decide what it is you want.’
They were talking as they had years back. They were older and the topics had changed radically, but so had they, he reflected as Jazz’s frank gaze pierced his heart.