‘But that’s what I want too. I have a hunting lodge in mind where you can stay until the work here is completed.’
‘A hunting lodge, hidden away? Is that so different?’ She gestured around and then let her arms drop to her side. She wanted to stay and work as a team, as they had on the island, not because she wanted to profit from it in any way but because she loved him and wanted to be with him.
‘I’ll leave you to think about it.’
She might have matured and learned from her mother’s mistakes, but Ra’id would never change, Antonia realised as he ducked his head to leave the pavilion. This was the man she had fallen in love with: a king; an autocratic ruler; a man who was master of all he surveyed.
But not her master, Antonia determined when Ra’id had been gone for some time and she’d had time to cool down. Mounting up, she pointed her kindly gelding in the direction of the fort. She would plough her own furrow, however long that took.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
ANTONIA had looked stricken when he had left her in the pavilion, while he felt not a moment’s guilt. He had tried the softly-softly approach, and much as he had expected it had got him nowhere. It was time to return to his default setting of intractable command. What he had planned for Antonia’s future was not only for the best for all of them, it was the only way they could move forward. She could take it or fight back, but conflict between them would only mean an unnecessary delay in her settling-in process.
She had accused him of being incapable of feeling, and maybe once he would have agreed with her. But his life had changed on the day a young virago had accosted him with a knife. Since then he felt everything acutely. Taking care of Antonia was his primary concern, but the luxury of showing his feelings was the one privilege he did not enjoy.
So maybe he had to lighten up? Allow Antonia to take more risks?
The one thing he was determined on was that Antonia would never take another risk and would not be put in danger. She might be a formidable force in the making, but if she was going to fulfil her potential she had to stay on track—and that was a track only Antonia could find. She thought he meant to keep her captive, when he knew that only the hand of life could contain her. Staying in Sinnebar or going back to Rome was Antonia’s choice, though he dearly wanted her to stay. But a royal child? On that there could be no compromise. His child would be brought up by him, under his roof and under his protection.
He was leaning against the trunk of a palm-tree, staring out at the desert, when he saw her mounting up. He couldn’t say it surprised him. Nothing about Antonia surprised him. For the sake of the horse he was glad she was lightweight. The gelding was moving well at the moment, but he had bathed its foreleg earlier, having noticed the first signs of trouble. He doubted she would get far, but he’d ride Tonnerre bareback and keep an eye on her.
So much for her brave adventure. Her horse went lame and she ended up leading it back to the pavilion. She could see Ra’id’s stallion tethered nearby, but not Ra’id himself. Maybe he had summoned some super-silent high-tech helicopter to whisk him back to the capital. So much for his protective instincts; she’d be better off alone.
She trudged back to the pavilion, having fed and watered her horse, knowing her options were shrinking. What kind of future awaited her if she didn’t sort this out? Would she be a prisoner like her mother? It had already begun—the waiting. Ra’id had said he’d be nearby, but he hadn’t even tried to stop her leaving, and now he’d gone.
Entering the silent pavilion, she tugged off her boots. Exhausted by everything that had happened that day, she just about managed to strip off her clothes before tumbling into a disillusioned ball on top of the silken cushions, where she quickly fell asleep.
She was dreaming of riding in front of a mysterious, dark stranger on a wild, black stallion across mile upon mile of desert when the sound of rustling skirts shocked her awake. Blinking against the light, she sat up, and it took her a moment to realise three women were bowing to her. ‘Please,’ she begged them groggily as she hastily dragged a sheet over her naked body. She whisked her hand around to mime that no one had to bow to her.
As the kohl-lined eyes smiled back at her, Antonia recognised the three Bedouin women she’d met a couple of days before. ‘I know you!’ she said, putting two and two together and realising that Ra’id must have left her to ask them to come and keep her company. ‘My riding clothes.’ She pointed to them, and the women nodded with enthusiasm, their ice-blue robes with the intricate silver crossstitch decoration twinkling in the strengthening light as Antonia thanked them for lending her such sensible clothes.