She put her arms around him and he did what he’d been trying not to do all day, which was to cry. He cried the tears he’d never cried before. Tears of loneliness and pain, which eventually gave way to the realisation that he was free at last. Free of the past and all its dark tentacles. He had let it go and Ellie had helped him do that.
His hand was shaking as he smoothed the pale hair away from her face and looked at her.
‘You would never do that,’ he said.
She turned her head slightly, so that she could kiss the hand which was still cupping the side of her face. ‘Do what?’
‘Leave our baby.’
She turned her head back, biting her lip, her grey eyes darkening. ‘I don’t want to judge your mother, or to compare—’
‘That wasn’t my aim,’ he said quietly. ‘I’m just stating a fact and letting myself be grateful for that fact. I’ve given you a hard time, Ellie, and a lot of women might have lost patience with me before now. Yet you didn’t. You hung on in there. You gave me strength and showed me the way.’
His question shimmered on the air as she looked into his eyes.
‘Because I love you,’ she said simply. ‘You must have realised that by now? But love sometimes means having to take a step back, because it can never flourish if there are darknesses or secrets, or things which never dare be spoken about.’
‘And I love you,’ he said, his free hand reaching out to lie possessively over the bump of their unborn child. A lump rose in his throat as he felt the powerful ripple of movement beneath. ‘I love you and our baby and I will love you both for ever. I will nurture and care for you both and never let you down. Be very certain of that, poulaki mou. I will never let you down.’
He could taste the salt from her own tears as he kissed her and did what he’d been wanting to do for so long. He lay down beside her and put his arms around her, gathering her close against his beating heart.
EPILOGUE
‘SO WHAT’S IT LIKE, being back?’ Ellie’s words seemed to float through the warm night air towards her husband. ‘Is it weird?’
Shining brightly through the unshuttered windows, the moon had turned the room into a fantasy setting of indigo and silver. Over their heads whirled a big old-fashioned fan and the sheets were rumpled around their gleaming bodies. The faint scent of sex hung in the air and mingled with the tang of the lemons squeezed into the water jug which stood beside the bed.
Ellie turned onto her side and looked at Alek, who lay beside her with his arms stretched above his head, looking a picture of blissful contentment.
This journey to Kristalothos was one they’d waited a while to make, until both of them were certain they were ready. A trip to the island home of Alek’s childhood—a place which symbolised so much of the darkness and horror of his past—was never going to be at the top of their bucket list. In fact, Ellie had been surprised when Alek had first suggested it because although their life had been hectic, it was pretty close to perfect. The birth of their son two years previously had put the seal on their happiness and Ellie had been...
She swallowed.
Frightened that going back would test their happiness and threaten to destroy it? Scared he might go back to being the secretive Alek of old who had locked her out of his heart—or that the reality of confronting his past might bring renewed bitterness?
Yes, she had thought all those things—and more. But she’d quashed her fears and entered into his plans with enthusiasm, because she’d sensed it was something he’d needed to do. Hadn’t she been the one who’d insisted you had to face your fears instead of running away from them? And perhaps there was some truth in the idea that you could never go forward until you were properly at peace with your past.
After much discussion, they had decided to leave their little boy behind in England. Young Loukas—their adored son, who they’d named after Alek’s twin brother and who had given them so much more than joy. It was the tiny tot more than anything who had been responsible for Alek’s growing ability to show emotion. Because children loved unconditionally and Alek had learnt to do the same. He had learnt that real love knew no boundaries and sometimes Ellie just sat watching him play with their little boy and her heart swelled up with so much pride and affection.
But a lively two-year-old was not an ideal companion for a cathartic trip which might be emotionally painful, which was why they’d left him behind with Bridget—who had become his honorary grandmother.