Sordid (Sordid 1)

His words did nothing to calm me, but my anxiety shifted slowly from danger to my lack of experience with men. “What did you want to talk about?”

“You.”

I’d swear he could sense the change in my nerves. The light from the streetlamps outside flooded through the window, and shadows played across Luka’s face, giving him an almost threatening cast. But it faded when a faint smile tugged across his lips.

“What’s your major?”

My heart was lodged in my throat, making it difficult to breathe or speak. “Biology. Pre-med.”

“Oh.” Most people looked impressed when I told them that, but not Luka. His expression remained fixed.

“You?”

“I’m alumni now. I got my MBA last year.”

A warning flashed through me. What was he doing at a frat party when he didn’t go to Randhurst anymore? My unease must have been visible.

“My brother, Vasilije,” Luka said quickly, like he wanted to explain. “He got in trouble, and part of the deal he made with my father was I get to keep an eye on him.” His tone was sharp. “I have things I’d rather fucking do than hang out with a bunch of drunk, underage college kids.”

The statement rankled. “I’m not drunk, underage, or a kid compared to you.”

I wasn’t prepared for Luka’s smirk. It looked like sin when it washed through his expression. “No? If you’re not underage, why aren’t you at the bars?”

Crap. I shifted on my heels. “My roommate’s not twenty-one.” It wasn’t a lie.

“So, Addison, we’re both stuck here for other people.” Luka took a step toward me, and even though there was still quite a bit of space left between us, his one small step felt enormous. Like he was now twice the size he’d been a second ago.

My chest was beginning to feel warm, no doubt from the tequila. “How is it you remember my name?”

“Probably for the same reason you remember mine.”

That was incredibly doubtful, but I kept my face plain. “Calculus was that memorable for you?”

“Yeah, it was. You were there every class, staring at me.”

I inhaled sharply, mortified, and tore my gaze away. “I did not.”

“Look at me.” His firm tone made it so there was no other option but to obey. When I did, his black eyes were focused and intense. “You stared when you didn’t think I could tell, but you weren’t very good at hiding it.” I opened my mouth to deny further, but he cut me off. “I was better than you. I made sure you never noticed I was looking.”

My brain disconnected and thought ceased. “Why?”

Luka’s hands rested casually on his hips, just over the fake police belt and gun holster. “Because a girl like you . . .” He scrubbed a hand over his mouth. He seemed to search for the right word, but not find it, and every drawn-out second that passed made it worse. Because a girl like you . . . Isn’t good enough. Rich enough. Smart enough. A girl like you isn’t experienced enough.

“You shouldn’t be interested in a guy like me.”

“What?” I was intelligent and well spoken, and yet I couldn’t choke out more than one word at a time.

“I’m not a nice guy.”

I swallowed hard. “Well . . .” How was I supposed to respond to that? “I’m sure that’s not true.”

He said nothing. Luka remained like a statue with the light glinting off the shiny plastic badge clipped to his chest. He didn’t argue or defend himself, and tension wound around us like ruthless vines.

My question was breathy. “Why did you stare at me if you weren’t interested?”

“Did I say I wasn’t interested?” He took another step, growing larger still, reaching a point where I couldn’t see anything else. Just him. “Nobody looked at me the way you did, and I liked it. It’s exactly how you’re looking at me now.”

All the air vanished from the room.

“And how’s that?” I said. It was dizzying when he took the final step and brought us chest to chest, his mouth inches from mine. I stared up at him with wide eyes. Was any of this effect from the tequila, or was it all him? His gaze traced over each inch of my face, and I could feel it etching into my skin.

“Like you want me to do bad things to you.”

Oh my God.

As he’d done, I stood motionless, neither confirming nor denying. I held my breath, waiting for him to make his move. I expected him to kiss me. Or maybe laugh in my face, although Luka didn’t seem like the type to laugh easily. He was deadly serious.

“Do you?” His question was soft and indifferent, even as it carried the weight of an enormous challenge.

Did I want him to do bad things to me? “I don’t know,” I blurted out. “Maybe.”

Luka looked just as I felt—surprised by my admission. What had I just sort of agreed to? A tremble began in the backs of my knees and moved upward when his head tipped down. His mouth lowered until his warm lips sealed over mine.