He’d punched the air clean from my lungs. His admission was stunning, and it was an apology, not in words, but in actions.
“Christ,” he groaned, smoothing a hand back over his hair. “I’m not any good at this shit, Addison. I don’t think you understand how badly I wanted you. I’ve had you, and I still want you.” His words made me feel weightless. “Every time I touch you, I just want more.”
I blinked in disbelief, at a total loss.
“Say something,” he demanded. His chest rose and fell with his hurried breathing.
My voice was uneven. “What do you want me to say?”
“Tell me you feel it, too.”
My guts twisted inside, and I banded my arms tight around myself. He’d raped me. He was holding me here against my will. And yet, I felt it. “I . . .” He’d said no lies, and I was already in over my head. I was sick. The last, tiny hold on my control slipped from my grasp. “I feel it.”
He was capable of expressing relief. His face softened as my words fell on him, and the smile spread across his lips like wildfire. God, he could be so beautiful when he wanted to. Like any event you waited for with excited anticipation, the smile was over much too quickly.
I wasn’t sure exactly how it happened. He didn’t give me a command, at least not verbally, but I sensed what he wanted. I’d admitted it, so it was too late for me to save myself. I stood from my chair, stalked around the edge of the table, and stepped into his waiting arms. I was pulled down into his lap.
As we were kissing, I was aware I was the dumbest girl in the world to let it happen. I’d already allowed him in my mind and my body—how long would it be before I allowed him in my heart?
His lips roved over mine and his tongue slipped into my mouth. I gripped his face, holding on against his dominating, yet needy kiss. I was spinning, drunk off of him.
“I’m gonna fuck you on this kitchen table.”
I closed my eyes and imagined it. I’d be sprawled out beside our half-eaten dinners with him thrusting powerfully between my legs. I grew damp, and my pulse kicked. “Okay.”
Aggression flickered in his eyes as he stood, dumping me on my feet. “I wasn’t asking permission.”
He put a hand on my shoulder and shoved me to sit on the tabletop, causing it to groan in protest. I expected him to have me flat on my back, or order me to take off my clothes, but he grabbed his glass of wine and drank while he stood casually between my legs. His gaze didn’t deviate from mine, though. His free hand found my knee and rested there, his palm warm.
“You feel that?” he asked as his hand squeezed. “My goddamn hand is aching for more. It wants to be on your tits. Touching your pussy. Inside you.”
Maybe my wine was drugged. There wasn’t any other reason why I suddenly felt so brave, despite the tremble in my core. I put my hands flat against the tabletop, leaned back, and spread my legs wider. I was signifying he had full access and could do whatever he wanted. There were warning alarms screaming in my head, but I willingly ignored them.
My gesture of submission had quite the impact on Luka. His hand tensed on my leg and he seemed to stop breathing. It was nice to catch him off guard and know I had such an effect on him, but I didn’t get to enjoy it for long. His wine glass was set down with a quiet thud. One hand slid around my back while the other cupped the side of my neck, and his lips captured mine.
His kiss was mean and delicious. I sighed softly and tried to scoot my body closer—
My cellphone rang, interrupting us. I froze. He’d been carrying my cell all day? Luka dug my phone out of his back pocket and handed it to me. Sure enough, the screen announced it was my mother. My heart was pounding, and it was impossible to switch gears so rapidly. To come down off of the high of him.
He stared at me expectantly, and I dry swallowed.
“Hey, Mom,” I said after answering it. “Hold on, I need to put you on speaker.” I tapped the screen.
“—father’s on the line, too.” Her voice blared from the phone. “Addie, are you there?”
“I’m here,” I said. “What’s going on?”
Luka took the phone from me, placed it on the table, and his hands trapped my hips, sliding me to the edge. It fitted me against him and his arousal pressed against mine, both of us held back by clothes.
My mother’s voice was bursting with energy. “We got some exciting news today!”