She gasps a couple of times, the nerves still getting to her before she nods. “Thank you so much, Will, I appreciate it a lot. You have been a wonderful help. Goodnight. I hope you sleep well.”
“You too.” I offer her a bright smile. “Goodnight and I promise that we will have a great night tomorrow.”
My heart basically bleeds as I make my way next door, it’s killing to leave her behind, but there is only a wall separating us. At least it’s only that else I don’t think that I would be able to make myself leave…
Chapter 7 – Serena
Oh God, this is posh. I feel a little uneasy as I stand in the reception area of the new office where I will be working. This is the first time that I have ever been here since all of the interviewing was done over the phone and via video chat. I have to admit that this place is intimidating as all hell. I know that I’m ready for this, this is what I have spent my whole life working towards, but I can’t stop the nerves from creeping in.
It’s all so modern and sleek, all so exciting and crisp, and everyone who works here looks incredible, impeccable. There isn’t a thread out of place or smudged make up in sight. It scares me, will I be able to fit in? Am I good enough for this place? I don’t know. I don’t think I’ve ever fit in really, certainly not in high school. I was never good enough for any of those people, which was reinforced when I got home when my stepdad, David would start…
But I don’t have the shadow of my stepfather here. I don’t have David making me feel like shit about myself, and I need to shake his effect off. I need to remember that I have been hired for a reason and it’s because the HR team here saw something in me. They believe in me, so I should believe in myself too.
Hey, if I can come here as a shy lonely virgin and connect with a man like Will straight away, then why can’t I make friends in this unlikely place as well? I’m the new Serena now, much better and stronger. Much more of myself. The man that I have in my life now supports me and makes me feel better. He is good for me. Not like David.
While I wait for Alisha, the head of my department, to come and get me to show me around, I let memories of my mother flood my mind. I’ve admittedly been too distracted to think about her recently. I haven’t been alone enough to worry about what she’s up to, but right now in this awkward moment she is all of me. I can’ help but panic about what her life might look like without me there. Sometimes I was the one to antagonize David, without even trying I could wind him up and put him in a temper, but other times I was the one in her way, protecting her from him. Such as with the cooking. Mom never expressed any hurt at me leaving, she understood, but I will always feel guilty about it. I so wish that I could have just picked her up and brought her here with me. She would love it here. I could even be the one to support her and everything. I would do anything to make her happy.
But she isn’t ready to leave him, I have to remind myself. I can’t do anything until she is ready.
I glance around the office, noting that no one is coming for me yet, which is hardly a surprise because I am very early. I couldn’t wait to get here, to get started, which means I have some time, so I could put in a quick call to my mother…no one is looking at me yet so I don’t see why not. I step to the side, to the corner of the room, and call her with my heart racing. I wasn’t expecting Mom to call me to check in on me, because I know that David won’t let her, but that’s sad isn’t it? It’s a shame that we are denied a normal mother and daughter relationship by someone. We can’t just speak freely and spend time together without him having to wreck it like he does every single time.
Ring, ring… Ring, ring… Ring, ring…
I bounce on my feet nervously as I wait for my mother to answer. I’m terrified to learn what state she is in. I’m scared to hear her crying and to know that there isn’t anything that I can do just yet because I’m about to start work…
Oh! I go through to voice mail, Mom doesn’t pick up at all. David must be hanging over her shoulder like an asshole, not allowing her to speak to me. I hate the control that prick has over her. It isn’t right. I want my mother to have a nice life, to find a love that lifts her up, a bit like what I’m experiencing with Will, but she isn’t getting that.