Catherine ignored my mother and bent down to begin gathering the clothes. “That’s impossible—” she began, but stopped suddenly.
My mother had dropped down to her knees and grabbed the clothes. Catherine was so shocked she let go of the clothes which made my mother tumble to the ground. She was lying on the ground clutching the clothes to her chest.
Freya
I was in shock, the kind that made me so angry I started to shake. I didn’t remember moving across the room, but in an instant, my hand was locked around my mother’s wrist and I was pulling her up with all my might. I fought it, but the tears blinded me, and made me delirious with fury.
“Get up!” I yelled.
My mother was so surprised to see me, “Freya,” she whispered.
I hid my face from hers, as I pulled her up then turned around to the woman. “Get out!” I screamed at her. “Get the fuck out of here, and you can take your damn clothes with you.” I was shaking so hard my words were incomprehensible. “How fucking dare you treat my mother like she was a piece of shit you stepped on? Just because she has fallen on hard times doesn’t mean you get to treat her like that.”
My mom held my arms to pull me backwards to stop me.
The woman’s gaze roved between the both of us. Finally, she shook her head. “I’ll give you till tomorrow afternoon,” she said coldly. “After that, we’re done. I’m pulling all our stock out.”
Then she walked out of the store.
I glared after her, wishing that I could hurt her arrogant ass, even half as much as she’d heartlessly just hurt my mother. For a second, I shut my eyes to calm myself, then I wiped the tears away from my cheeks and turned around to meet my mother’s white face.
“What are you doing here?” she asked, as though nothing had just happened, even though her lips were quivering. “Don’t you have to be at class?”
I watched my mother fight with everything she had in her, to keep standing, to make me believe that her pride had not just been shattered into a thousand pieces at how deeply and completely she had been humiliated in front of Martin and me.
She couldn’t hold on to that composure for long though. Before she could fall apart in front of us, she turned around and rushed back into her office. “I need to make a quick call, give me a moment.” Her voice sounded strangled and thick.
I gave her several minutes while I quietly joined Martin in hanging up the clothes that had been thrown to the ground.
When we were done, Martin nodded at me. “Go on. Go to her.” I had never heard him sound so sad.
I headed to her office, then turned back. “Have you been paid, Martin?”
He shook his head silently.
I knocked on the door.
“Come in,” my mother called.
I opened the door to my mother’s bright, plastic smile. I didn’t smile back. I couldn’t.
Her smile faltered. “Don’t you have class?” she asked. “You’re not meant to be here.”
I walked up to her and enveloped her in a huge hug. Poor thing was shaking like a leaf. “Oh, Mom, I’m so, so, so sorry,” I sobbed.
She patted my back as if I was a child. “It’s okay, darling. It’ll work itself out. You’ll see. I just need one big sale. Then everything will be fine. I don’t know why I behaved like that.”
I drew away from her and looked into her eyes. She was begging me to play along. To pretend that nothing was wrong. To pretend that I hadn’t seen her abject humiliation. Now, I felt beyond sorry that I had lost control … that I’d been unable to hide myself, so she wouldn’t know I had witnessed her in such a state.
Somehow, I made my mouth move. “I’m sorry for interfering,” I apologized. “I do have class, but I just dropped by to apologize for last night and to say I don’t have to work tonight so I’ll cook. We can have your favorite.”
“Oooo … chateaubriand with bordelaise sauce?”
I smiled at my mother. In a way, you had to admire her. The bubble she had built around her was made of Teflon. “No, not that. I was thinking of green curry and rice.”
She grinned. “That would be wonderful, darling. I’ll pick a bottle of something nice to have with it.”
I bit my tongue, but I didn’t say anything. Let her have her bottle of something nice. “Okay, Mom.” I reached up to her face and took off her glasses.
She tutted. “Oh, I can’t believe I went out wearing them.” She touched her glasses.
“I love you—Mom.” My voice broke.
My mother’s eyes filled with tears. “I love you too, my little button. Now I want you to go to class and stop thinking about our finances. I’ll sort everything out. I promise. We will be fine.”
I nodded my agreement with a smile, and echoed her words, “We will be fine.”
“That’s my girl,” she said approvingly.
“See you later, then,” I said and walked out of her little backroom office.
In the past year, we had lost almost everything: my father, our status, our homes, our cars, a good proportion of our ‘friends’, even our peace of mind. Not anymore. My mother was going to keep her pride. I determined right then I was going to ensure she would be able to hold her head high again. She was not going to lose the apartment that my father had bought for her when they first got married.