“I saw you last night, Dad.”
He doesn’t so much as blink. Not even a flicker of guilt enters his dark eyes. His lack of response is almost enough to make me question what I saw.
When he remains silent, I repeat myself, louder this time. “I was at Marco’s last night and saw you having dinner with a blond woman.”
Dad laughs, but the sound is forced. “You’re mistaken, I was in Cincinnati.”
He’s lying. I know what I saw. He was at the restaurant.
His dishonesty this morning is almost as hurtful and disappointing as catching him with another woman was last night. He’d rather create doubts in my mind than own up to his own shady actions. I never expected this kind of behavior from him.
It only hardens everything inside me.
“Stop lying. Beck is the one who spotted you, Dad. He didn’t want me to see, so he tried to hustle me out of the restaurant. But I saw you anyway.” I fold my arms tightly across my chest. “Would you like me to call him down here?”
His jaw tightens as anger flashes in his eyes. “That won’t be necessary.”
My voice drops as I shake my head. “You were never out of town, were you?”
“No.”
Even though I was expecting the answer, it still hits me like a sucker punch.
As painful as this line of questioning is, I push on. “Who is she?”
The anger dissipates from his eyes as sadness creeps in. “Does it really matter?”
Is he serious?
Of course, it matters.
“You’ve been cheating on Mom.” My eyes pop wide with disbelief. “So yeah, it kind of matters.”
“She’s a colleague,” he begrudgingly admits.
Un-fucking-believable.
“How long has this been going on for?”
“A while,” he mutters, looking away.
What does that mean?
A few weeks?
A few months?
A few years?
Longer?
It makes me sick to my stomach and I find myself unable to continue. My belly churns, and for a moment, I wonder if I’ll throw up. My arms drop to my sides as if they weigh a thousand pounds. “How could you do this to Mom?”
“I never meant for any of this to happen.” His shoulders slump forward. “I—”
“That doesn’t matter!” I cry with frustration. “You’ve been sneaking around and having an affair with another woman! Not only have you lied to Mom, you’ve been lying to me!”
“My personal relationships have nothing to do with you.” He plows a hand through his hair. “You don’t understand what it’s been like since Brianna died.”
“Really?” How can he say that? “I know exactly what it’s been like! You’re not the only one who lost her! Mom lost a daughter, and I lost my only sister! We all lost her, Dad, it wasn’t just you!” Tears sting my eyes as anger boils in my blood. “How dare you use Brianna as an excuse for your infidelity!”
Heat slams into his cheeks as he winces. For the first time since his affair has been dragged into the light, he looks ashamed. “I’m not using her as an excuse,” he mumbles.
“That’s exactly what you’re doing.” I’m so disgusted by this conversation that I don’t even want to look at him.
“Losing her was more than any of us could bear and we all dealt with our grief differently.”
“Did you ever consider,” I shoot back, “that we should have dealt with it together instead of splintering apart the way we did?”
“Her death was so painful.” His eyes grow distant. “Sometimes it felt as if the grief was more than I could bare.”
I know, but still…
“What about Mom? Does she have any idea what’s going on?” Maybe Beck is right, and she’s aware of Dad’s infidelity. If that turns out to be the case, I’m not sure how I’ll be able to look at either of them the same way again.
He shakes his head. “She doesn’t know.”
“You have to tell her, Dad. You have to make everything right. This can’t continue.”
Emotion flickers in his eyes before his gaze darts away.
A sliver of dread snakes down my spine as an uncomfortable silence stretches to the breaking point. “You are going to end this, right?” Panic and disbelief weave their way through my voice.
He drags a hand over his face. “The situation is more complicated than you can understand.”
“You know what I understand?” Before he can respond, I continue, voice rising with every word. “That you made vows to Mom and when Brianna was taken from us, you took the easy way out and had an affair. That’s what I understand.”
The sound he makes when he swallows is audible. “I need to think about what’s best for everyone in this situation.”
What’s best for everyone?
What the hell does that mean?
A strangled laugh slides from my lips. “You know what would be best for me? If my family stayed together.” My voice fills with anger. “I think Mom would agree with that, don’t you?”