Holding Onto Forever

“I’d like you to live here as my girlfriend, as my lover.”

“Noah…”

“For months I’ve been trying to get you alone, but someone is always around. I take you on a date, Quinn shows up. We’re alone at the condo and Elle comes home. I take you to my hotel, your mom calls. Ever since I asked your dad for permission to date you, something has been preventing me from… well, from being with you.”

“You’ve never told me what my dad said?”

Noah sits down next to me. “I think that’s between your dad and I, and while I still think that, I have a feeling he’s been plotting against us.”

I start laughing, but Noah frowns. “I thought you weren’t attracted to me.”

His eyes go wide. “Are you serious?” Noah shakes his head. “I’ve been walking around with a raging hard-on for months. I mean, at first I was waiting because I wanted to make sure you wanted to be with me, and sometimes I still question–”

I don’t let Noah finish his statement before attacking him with as much vigor as I can muster. For two people who are in love, we’re horrible about reading each other’s cues, but not anymore. Noah deftly moves us up the bed without breaking our kiss. I’m tugging and pulling at his clothes, trying to get his shirt off and his jeans unbuttoned.

“Eager?” he asks. I nod and shimmy out of my shorts. “What about this?” he pulls at the hem, but I shake my head. I’m not comfortable taking my top off, and he knows that. Noah nods and pulls his shirt off slowly, revealing his washboard abs. I’ve seen him bare-chested many times, but everything seems different now.

He slides his jeans down his legs, pausing only to remove a condom from his pocket. I take it from him and examine the packaging.

“It’s valid, don’t worry.”

“I’m not worried because I know you would never do anything to hurt me.”

Noah cups my face and brings his lips to mine. “I love you, so much it hurts sometimes when I think about heading back to work and leaving you.”

“I love you, Noah. I love you so much.” Our lips and tongue meet again, but now he’s exploring. His hand moves up my shirt and grazes over my scar. My body tenses until his fingers slide under my bra. His large hand easily covers my breast while his other moves to my center. My legs spread, welcoming him. The first brush of his thumb over my sensitive bud sends a quake of shivers over my body.

Noah is everywhere. And so am I. His mouth is on my neck. My hands are roaming his body, pulling at him to get closer to me. His hands push and grab in all the right places and his fingers… I cry out when they enter me. My hand finds his erection, tugging gently at his smooth-skinned shaft. And when he groans in my ear, I smile.

He searches for the condom, ripping the package open and sliding the rubber over his hard-on. “This will be fast, Captain. I’ve been waiting for this to happen again since your prom.”

“Really?”

Noah answers by pushing himself into my sex and pausing. “You have no idea. I’ve waited for a long time for you, Peyton.”

Not as long as I have, Noah.

“I’m yours now,” I tell him as I cup his face. He tilts his head and kisses my palm as he slides into me. My eyes close from the sensation.

“Open your eyes. I want to see you,” he tells me as he moves languidly. Every thrust, his eyes are on me, and when they’re not, he’s kissing me deeply. I’ve never been made love to before, and I’m thankful I waited for this moment because being with Noah is like no other feeling in the world.

Our first time, we don’t climax together because let’s get real, we haven’t been together in years. But every time after that, through every room in our new apartment, he plays my body like it’s the two-minute warning and scores each and every time.

Sometime during the night, he whispers, “I love you. I’m going to love you forever.”

“Same,” I reply.

34

Noah

Even though I rented a place for Peyton and I in Chicago, I had to convince her to move to Portland with me for a little bit while I prepared for the season. When I wasn’t working my ass off with the team, we would find a deserted field and work on my passing and footwork. Let me tell you something, there’s nothing like watching your girl run after a ball, knowing that months prior she couldn’t even stand on her own.

My girl’s a superhero.

My girl’s also back at school and I’m missing her terribly. I bow down to Steve Jobs and the Apple crew for creating FaceTime because without it I’d be going stir crazy. I never thought I was an obsessive sort of guy until Peyton and I finally figured it out. Now it’s like I can’t get enough of her, and the days I am home in Chicago are spent being domesticated. We created a rule in our home when it comes to football. I love that she’s walking the sidelines for the Bears, but hate it as well. Selfishly, I want her in Portland, but know it’s not possible and likely never will be. If she were there, I’d be distracted and worried about whether she’s out of harm’s way all the time. When we’re together for the few short days each week – it’s no football – just us. We cook together, take walks through the city, watch movies with the fire roaring in the background, and I help her study. I didn’t want our relationship to be based off the sport we love. It had to be based on everything else that makes us who we are.