I regret those words an hour later, when I watch yet another person get murdered by a group of crazy people living in the middle of nowhere. Holding the blanket up to my eyes, I peek over the top, knowing I’m going to have nightmares about this crap for a good year, if not more, and I will never be able to go to the desert again. Not that I’ve ever been, but still.
“Dad.” Steven’s voice breaks into the dark, and I cover my head with the blanket and scream at the top of my lungs.
“Jesus, babe,” Zach mutters, pulling the blanket away from my face, and Aubrey, who is sitting on the floor, falls to her side laughing, while Zach chuckles and Penny crawls onto my lap to protect me.
“God, Mom. What’s wrong?” Hunter asks, while Steven flips on the light in the living room and Aubrey pauses the TV.
“Nothing, I’m fine,” I lie, holding my chest. Aubrey rolls around on the ground, and Penny decides she wants to get in on the action and jumps down off the couch and begins to lick Aubrey’s face, making her giggle louder.
“What’s up, bud?” Zach asks, looking at Steven, and I pull my eyes from Aubrey to look at him, seeing he looks worried.
“Mom said her car won’t start and asked if you could come and help her,” he replies, and Zach stands.
“Did she say where she was?” he questions, and Steven nods.
“Yeah, at the Shore House. She just got off work. She tried to call you, but you didn’t pick up.”
“I’ll take care of it, bud.” Zach walks past him and Hunter comes into the room, but Steven follows behind him.
“What are you guys watching?” Hunter asks, taking a seat next to me on the couch, and I pull my eyes from the doorway to look at him, not liking the feeling I have in my stomach.
“The Hills Have Eyes,” Aubrey says, and his eyes widen.
“Don’t say it. I know it’s scary, and no, you can’t watch it.” I hold up my hand in his direction.
“I’ve already seen it.” He shrugs, leaning down and grabbing a handful of popcorn from the bowl on the floor next to Aubrey.
“What, when?” I frown. I haven’t let him watch any scary movies, even though he’s begged me to.
“When I stayed the night at Eli’s house once, we watched it.”
“Did his mom and dad know?”
“Yeah, they didn’t care,” he says, shoving another handful of popcorn into his mouth and leaning back against the couch.
“You could have had nightmares.”
“I’m not a chicken, Mom.”
“Are you calling me a chicken?” I ask, and he smiles through a mouthful of popcorn but doesn’t answer.
“Whatever,” I grouch, watching him chew and swallow.
“You scream like a girl,” he points out, and I grab the pillow from beside me and hit him with it softly.
“I am a girl,” I remind him, and he laughs, pulling the pillow away from me tucking it behind his back.
“Yeah, but you scream like the girls do in the movie.”
“You really do,” Aubrey agrees, and I toss my hands up in the air.
“Well, that’s because I was scared, and those girls are scared because crazy people are trying to kill them.” They look at each other laughing, and then look toward the doorway when Zach walks back into the room, shoving his cell phone into the front pocket of his jeans.
“Is Mom okay?” Aubrey asks, as Zach moves back toward the couch, taking a seat on the other side of me.
“Your mom’s good, gorgeous. Arney’s heading over to give her a jump, since he’s closer than me, and he’ll follow her home to make sure she gets there okay,” he tells her, and that unease I was feeling disappears.
“Okay.” She wraps her arms around Penny’s neck, forcing her into her lap, then moves her eyes from her dad to me. “We don’t have to watch anymore if you don’t want to, Shelby.”
“I don’t mind,” I lie, hearing Zach and Hunter both laugh while watching Steven come into the room with a handful of cookies, chewing the one he obviously already popped in his mouth.
“I’m going to walk Hunter to his house,” he tells his dad after swallowing. Hunter stands, but I grab his hand before he can walk off.
“I’m right next door. You can call or come get me for any reason.”
“I know, Mom.” He shakes his head, looking at Steven like ‘moms are so annoying’ and I let go of his hand and feel Zach’s hit my thigh, squeezing. “While you’re there, I can show you the telescope my dad got me. It’s not dark enough to use it yet, but it’s all set up.”
“Cool,” Steven agrees, and they both leave without another word.
I look at Zach. “You guys start the movie back up. I’m going to the bathroom then making a phone call.”
“You don’t want us to wait for you?” Aubrey asks, running her hands through Penny’s fur.
“No, honey, you guys go ahead.” I smile at her then give Zach’s thigh a squeeze as I get up off the couch, tossing the blanket I was using on the back then reach down and run my hand over the top of Aubrey’s hair before stepping away.
“Are you sure you don’t want us to wait for you?” Zach calls to my back, and I fight back a groan, hearing Aubrey laugh.
“Nope, enjoy. Don’t wait for me. I may be awhile,” I tell them, leaving and heading for Zach’s room. I don’t really have to use the bathroom or make a call, but I do have my Kindle app on my cell phone, so I can hide away and read until the movie’s done and hopefully forget about the horror I’ve seen altogether.
“I shouldn’t have let you watch that movie,” Zach says against my ear, pulling my body into his and tossing his thigh over both of mine. Probably trying to keep me in one place, since I can’t stop moving.
“I can’t seem to find sleep. Sorry for keeping you awake.”
“Don’t apologize.” He gives my waist a squeeze and kisses the back of my head.
“Do you think it was wrong of me to sleep over here? Does it make me a bad mom?” I question, and he moves, rolling me to my back, and rests his hand on the side of my face, looking down at me with the light coming in from the outside.
“You’re not a bad mom. Max is with Hunter right now. He’s not alone, and I know if Max weren’t there, you wouldn’t be here right now. You would be home with him.”
“You’re right.” I sigh, then whisper, “Max’s girlfriend is pregnant.”
“What?” He frowns, movi
ng his hand down to the side of my neck.
“His girlfriend is pregnant. He told me today.”
“Are you upset about it?”
“What? No.” I shake my head then roll to my side, tucking my face against his chest.
“He’s an idiot. She told him if he’s still so in love with me that he should come try to win me back,” I say, and he growls, “Pardon?”
“I told you he’s an idiot.”
“Do you want him back?” he asks quietly, sounding worried.
I pull my face away from his chest and look up at him. “No, absolutely not, and I know he doesn’t really want me back either. I didn’t make him happy. I’m not the kind of wife he wanted. I wasn’t good at sitting at home all day waiting for him.”
“Is that why you two end things?”
“Partly, but mostly because I couldn’t be who he wanted me to be.”
“What do you mean?”
“He didn’t want me to work. I loved staying home when Hunter was younger, but as he got older and started school, I wanted to do something with my time that didn’t involve lunches, pedicures, and hair appointments. I was tired of being the stay-at-home wife who actually did nothing but stay home alone most of the time, listening to my so-called friends gossip about my other so-called friends. I didn’t clean, because we had a housekeeper I didn’t cook much, because Max was never home, and it was only Hunter and me.
“Hunter had a hundred activities that kept us from the house until late in the evening most days, so takeout was easier. I was losing myself a little more each day, and when I tried to tell Max how I was feeling, he would just ignore me and carry on, because he was happy, so that was all that mattered to him.”
“I’m sorry you weren’t happy.”
“Me too, but I learned a lot from him,” I say softly running my fingers down his side.
“What’s that?” he prompts, gently pressing a kiss to my forehead.
“I learned that if you’re with someone and they really love you, they put your happiness and theirs together. They don’t try to fit you into their box. They don’t put their wants above yours. They find a way to make it so you are both fulfilled and getting what you each need out of life,” I say. When I hear nothing from him in response—not even a breath—I wonder if he’s fallen asleep. “Zach?”