I unconsciously lean against his side and then try to lean away when I realize what I’m doing, but his hold tightens, preventing me from moving.
“That I do. Take a seat, and we’ll bring you your order when it’s up.” He waves us off.
Kai turns us around, leading me over to one of the picnic tables that are set up. I sit and look around, avoiding looking at Kai. Once again, my emotions are in turmoil, and it is all his fault—or at least I’m going to blame him for it.
“What are you thinking, makamae?” His hand takes mine.
Part of me wants to pull away, but the other part of me, the part that is tethered to him, wants to grab him and never let go.
“I’m so confused.” I shake my head then turn to look at him. “I really hate that you make me feel like I’m two completely different people.”
“What do you mean?”
I let out an irritated huff before answering him. “There is this side of me that really dislikes you and the things you do. Then there’s this other side of me that doesn’t care about the part that dislikes you. She just likes you, all of you.” I let out a breath then glare when I see his smile. “You should know I think the part of me that likes you is an idiot.”
He presses his lips together then lets his head fall back, and roaring laughter comes out of his mouth. I have seen him laugh before, and like all of those times, my stomach flutters.
“It’s not funny.” I roll my eyes.
“Yes, it’s funny.” He continues laughing.
A smile forms on my lips from watching him. His eyes drop to my mouth and his expression goes soft.
“All the parts of me like you, lakamae,” he tells me with such sincerity that the warm feeling begins to seep back into my belly.
“What does makamae mean?”
His hand comes up and he cups my cheek, his thumb running over my bottom lip. I don’t expect him to answer me, but unlike all the other times, his face comes closer to mine so close that I can feel his lips brush mine as he whispers, “Precious.”
Holy shit! I jerk my head back in shock and search his face.
“Grub’s up!” is yelled, breaking the moment, and I face forward just as Derek sets a plate in front of me and another in front of Kai.
“Thanks,” I tell Derek while my insides churn.
Kai calls me precious? I look over at him, and his gaze is still on me.
“Let us know if you need anything else,” Derek mutters, and I’m sure he can feel the strange energy that is floating around between Kai and me.
“Will do,” Kai assures him, his stare never leaving mine.
As soon as Derek is out of earshot, Kai speaks again. This time, his voice is soft in a way that wraps around and inside me.
“I know this is difficult for you, Myla. I know I’ve done wrong, but I want you to understand something. I’m a man who was raised to do what needs to be done, never taking into consideration anyone else. I know the results of that have hurt you, but as I’ve told you from the beginning, I will tell you again. I will do whatever I have to in order to protect you. So, at the end of the day, even if you’re pissed at me, that works, ‘cause that means you’re still breathing.”
He looks over my shoulder then back at me again, letting out a long breath before continuing, “I will not give up on there being an us because I know we are worth fighting for. So you can be pissed and hold your ground, but I’m going to do the same, and while I’m doing it, I hope you will give us another chance.”
“You’re really good at this apology stuff…when you’re not being a jerk,” I mutter.
He smiles then takes my hand, placing a kiss over the ring I still haven’t taken off. It’s almost like he’s telling me that he sees it and knows that, as upset as I am, I still haven’t given up on us either. I look at his hand and notice that the ring I gave him is still sitting on his finger.
“One day at a time, Kai. That’s all I can offer you,” I whisper.
“I’ll take it, makamae.” He places another kiss on my hand then nods down at my plate. “Eat. They really are the best fish tacos in Hawaii,” he divulges to me.
He isn’t wrong—though I’m not sure if it is the tacos or the feeling of warmth I have back that makes them taste so good.
*
I watch the sunrise and take in the beauty of the moment. From the sound of the ocean to the smell that’s surrounding us, I can’t quite figure out what it is, but I know that it’s perfect. I lean back against Kai, and his arms wrap tighter around me, his thighs tightening against my sides. Since our dinner of delicious fish tacos two weeks ago, we have been working on us, and this us is way better than the previousone. I have let down my guard slightly, and I’m just enjoying the day-by-day time we spend together.
It isn’t so much that I have forgiven him for leaving me the way he did, but I’m trying to be understanding of the man he is, and like he told me, he is a man who is not used to answering to anyone. He is a man used to doing what needs to be done—damn the consequences. I can’t say I completely agree with this way of thinking, but I’ve been trying, and I can tell he is also trying to care when it comes to me and what I need from him.
“This is my favorite time of day,” he whispers, placing a gentle kiss on the side of my neck.
I have also learned something else about Kai; he is seriously romantic, even if he isn’t trying to be. Just this morning, when he woke me up, he handed me a sweater and led me out to the beach so I could experience my first Hawaiian sunrise. He often does small things that let me know he is thinking of me.
“It’s so quiet,” I tell him, rolling slightly to my side, letting my face rest on his bare chest while wrapping my arms around him.
“That’s why it’s my favorite. I have a moment to think. No phone, no one telling me that I’m needed—just me and nature.” He kisses the top of my head. “And now, you.”
Okay, that was sweet…really sweet. See what I mean when I sai
d he is seriously romantic?
I tilt my head and place a kiss to his skin, wordlessly letting him know how much that means to me. We sit here for a long while, watching as the sun rises into the sky. I’m not sure what he’s thinking about, but I know I’m silently hoping that we have hundreds more moments just like this one.
Chapter 10
Consummation
I walk into Kai’s office when I hear him calling me. I have no idea what could have set him off now, but judging by the bellowing of my name, I’m assuming it’s not a good thing.
“What’s going on?” I ask as soon as I walk over the threshold.
“What the fuck is this?” he roars, shoving a stack of papers at me.
I take them from him and instantly feel guilty. I haven’t had a chance to talk to Tammy about the divorce. I’ve been so caught up with Kai and us spending time together, getting to know each other, that it didn’t cross my mind. Not even once.
“Divorce papers,” I whisper when I read the first page.
“I see that, Myla. Why the fuck did I just get served with divorce papers?”
Oh, shit.
“I wanted a divorce?” I whisper then look up in time to see him plowing towards me.
I naturally back up until I feel the wall behind me. His face comes within inches from mine, and my pulse picks up.
“I told you I’m not going anywhere,” he growls, caging me in.
“I know.” I close my eyes and turn my head to the side.
“I told you that we are going to work this out,” he snarls, and I feel his hand on my side. “I told you we will never be over.” His hand comes up and he cups my breast through the material of my top as his teeth nip into my earlobe.
“Kai,” I breathe, and then I’m turned around and moving backwards. My ass hits his desk, and he leans over me slightly as he pushes all the papers and items off the top of his desk and onto the floor. “Kai,” I repeat nervously as his hands go to my shorts.
He quickly unbuttons them, sliding them down over my hips along with my panties. He takes the papers I didn’t realize I was still holding out of my hand, setting them on the desk. Then he lifts me to sit on top of them, spreads my legs wide, lowers his head, and buries his face between my wide-open thighs.