Shattered by You (Tear Asunder 3)

“Okay?” Crisis repeated, beaming, and holding the door open with his forearm.

I walked into the elevator and sat on the loveseat. “Yeah. Okay.”

“Yes!” Dana squealed.

“But both of you”—I looked from Kite to Crisis—“have to be with me when I tell Ream.”

Two hours later, the boom of Ream’s roar hit. “No fuckin’ way! Out of the question. Jesus, what are you thinking, Haven? Live with these guys? Man-whore parading chicks in and out and Kite . . .” he glared at him. “You may not parade them, but you sure as hell have plenty of them, too. My sister is not living with you guys. Forget it.”

He paced back and forth in the living room, shoulders tense, hands clenched into fists. Kite casually had one leg bent over the other as he sat on the couch and Crisis stood by the fireplace, looking rather relaxed considering my brother kept glancing at him with murderous eyes.

“It makes sense, pumpkin,” Kat offered and smiled at me. She called my brother pumpkin? “Close to school and not stuck out here in the middle of nowhere.”

Ream snorted. “Have you forgotten about the Crisis issue? The chick has written love letters on the internet to him.” I stiffened. Love letters? “She’s fine here with us. I can drive her anywhere she wants to go.”

“She doesn’t want that,” Kat continued. “She wants independence. Away from her controlling bullheaded brother.”

Did they forget I was standing right here?

“Jesus, I’m not trying to control her.”

Everyone was silent and Ream stopped pacing then looked at each of us before his eyes landed on me. “Haven, you want your own place, I’ll buy you an apartment. Or we can rent one, whatever you want. You can’t live with them.”

I hated the word can’t. I didn’t do well with the word can’t. I pushed away from the wall and shook my head. “This is my decision. My choice.” My tone hardened. “I get a choice now.” Ream crossed his arms, but I saw the flicker of uncertainty in his eyes. “You of all people know what it’s like not have a say in what happens to you. When you’re forced to do things you don’t want to do.” Ream’s jaw clenched, but his eyes softened, then closed briefly. “When other people make decisions for you.”

“Haven . . .” Ream came toward me, but I held up my hand, stopping him.

“I don’t want anyone’s sympathy or pity. And I don’t want to be told I can’t do something. I had that. I hated it and I finally escaped it.” I softened my tone. “Ream, I know you still see me as sixteen and weak, but I’m not.”

“I don’t see you as weak. I never did. Never. You were strong as hell, you still are. More than ever and I don’t know how you’ve done that, but you have. I just want you to feel like you’re safe. That you don’t have to be so strong anymore.”

“It’s who I am now, Ream.”

Kite casually played with his brow ring. “Security is top. Crisis had Luke check the place out, too.” I averted my eyes to Crisis. I hadn’t known that.

“And this Tammy chick? What about that?” Ream asked.

Crisis answered, “Luke is keeping an eye, but she’s in Alberta and everything she does is on-line crap. No reason for her to come to Toronto when she never has before.”

“She could.” Ream was persistent and I realized he was a lot like me. He didn’t give up easily and was stubborn.

“And if she does, we’ll deal. Luke will deal. The police will deal,” Crisis said. “We don’t live like that, Ream.” The two brothers locked eyes. It was kind of like an understanding between them with what Crisis said, and I wondered what it was. “Haven is travelling forty-five minutes to school and back. It doesn’t make sense for her.”

Ream stood silent for what seemed like five minutes, but was probably only a few seconds, then he nodded and his shoulders sagged. Kite got up and walked by me, placing his hand briefly on my hip while Kat reached for Ream and wrapped her arms around him, whispering something in his ear, which made him sag even more.

I approached them then reached out to him, putting my hand on his tatted forearm. “Living here with you and Kat on the farm . . . it’s not the right place for me.”

He nodded, pulled me into his arms and hugged me. “I love you so much, Angel,” Ream whispered.

I love you, too.

“HAVEN, WAIT UP.” I paused and looked over my shoulder at Dana, who jogged up beside me. “You want to go to karaoke tonight? Dillon booked a private room upstairs at this bar. There’s eight of us going.”

I opened the cafeteria door and the noise of dishes and boisterous voices drowned out my groan. “Not really my thing.”

“I swear you won’t have to sing if you don’t want to. Just sit and laugh at me making a complete fool of myself.” She placed a banana, water and bologna sandwich on her tray.

“Why do you want to do it, then?” My phone vibrated in my back pocket and tiny sparks flared across my skin. God, I was turned on by phone vibration.

“It’s fun.”

Dana talked about karaoke. I half-listened while thinking about the text, which I knew was from Crisis. I expected more texts since he hated when I didn’t respond and he let me know it, but my phone remained quiet. Maybe it was my brother who texted; disappointment settled in.

We grabbed lunch then went and sat at the table by the window with Dana’s crowd. Dillon’s buddies were on the lacrosse team and they were pretty nice, not rowdy like the football team. Rebecca and Tanya hung with us, too, having gone to the same high school with a couple of the guys on the team.

“Hey, hon.” Dillon slid over and Dana sat next to him.

“Haven, you coming to karaoke tonight?” Dillon’s best friend was Lac, the guy from my Creative Writing class with Professor Neale. I found out his real name was Johnny, but everyone called him Lac because he was the captain of the lacrosse team.