Suddenly, I couldn’t stand the distance between us. Who knew how long things would last? Who knew how long the window of opportunity would be there? I had to take advantage of it while I could.
I kissed her hard and long, my body still buzzing with adrenaline from the show and from the anger of seeing Mark with his arm around her. For her part, Leah kissed back just as ferociously, her lips jammed up against mine, her tongue a furious presence in my mouth. It was raw and just this side of painful, and somehow it was just another side of the sexiness that she always seemed to exhibit.
I didn’t want to let her go. I definitely didn’t want to watch her go back out into that bar where anyone else could see her. I wished there was some way I could let everyone know that she was mine. I had to settle with kissing her until her lips were swollen, her eyes dark with lust.
I didn’t want anyone else to have her. I wanted to be the only one.
I was in over my head, but I didn’t know what to do about it. She was my lifeline but at the same time, she was my kryptonite.
I kissed her again, sweeter this time. As she slowly smiled up at me, I had a flash of clarity. I knew I was hooked and that there was no going back.
18
Leah
My heart was pounding, just like it always seemed to be when Jayson was near. I had to admit, the whole evening had been thrilling in ways I had never experienced before. From dancing, watching Jayson up on the stage, to standing at the bar yelling at Mark, to being dragged back here, it was as though every small detail of each moment was seared into my brain.
Jayson seemed to hold the key to all the extremes of sensory pleasure for me. I had never felt like this before, and I knew inexplicably that I would never feel this way about anyone else for the rest of my life.
No, Jayson was special to me. And somehow, I knew that I was special to him as well.
That first kiss had my toes curling in my shoes. There was so much emotion in there, so much tension. I wanted him to drag me over to one of the questionable-looking couches along the back wall and take me right there, where anyone could walk in and see us.
This wasn’t me. Or this wasn’t a side of myself that I had ever known before. I wanted to feel ashamed of the way I gave in to him, but there was something about it all that was just so thrilling at the same time. And really, why should I be ashamed? We were two adults, and we wanted one another. We hadn’t talked about the terms of a relationship, but he clearly didn’t want to see me with anyone else, and that was good enough for now, wasn’t it?
He was a rock star, and he’d had had plenty of chances to bring someone else back here tonight, or even to watch someone else dancing around in front of the stage, but instead, he’d only had eyes for me. That was as good as anything that I could expect.
I was starting to wonder if maybe I had been too hasty in my judgment of him. Maybe we could make it work after all.
I shivered, my thoughts derailing as Jayson kissed his way along the tender skin of my neck. “You have no idea how turned on I was watching you dance,” he said, but as he rubbed up against me, I could feel just how hard he was, his bulge practically ripping a hole in his jeans. I reached down and stroked the fabric, and he groaned against my skin, his hips bucking toward me.
Things got hot and messy after that, our kisses turning sloppy, our hands groping and grasping. My whole body prickled with lust, and my chest swelled with emotions I didn’t dare name just yet.
Before things could go too far, though, the door opened. I yanked away from Jayson feeling embarrassed as well as annoyed at the interruption. Was it so much to ask that we could…
My thoughts trailed off at the look on Luke’s face. He looked genuinely apologetic as he averted his eyes from us. “Hey, man, sorry to interrupt, but I need a hand with Carter. I wouldn’t ask if he wasn’t making a total ass of himself.”
Jayson sighed and ran a hand back through his hair. For a moment, I could tell it was on the tip of his tongue to tell Luke to deal with it himself. But then he tucked himself back in and zipped up his pants, giving me an apologetic look. “Sure thing,” he said, heading toward the door. “What’s he up to now?”