“Um, hi,” I said.
“Can we talk?” Camilla asked.
I furrowed my brow at her as I mindlessly handed over the box.
“You had some things at my place,” I said.
She looked down at them before she took them, and I could have sworn I saw sadness in her eyes.
“If I take it, will you talk with me?” she asked.
“Yeah. Sure. I guess.”
She took the box from me and set it down on her small dining room table. Then she took my hand and led me to her couch. My mind was at a dead standstill. Of all the reactions I expected, this was hardly one I would have bet on. She sat down and pulled me down beside her, and I fell onto the couch next to someone I recognized. Camilla didn’t have the anger and bitterness behind her features that she’d had during our last few encounters, and I wondered what type of game she was playing.
“I’m sorry,” she said.
I narrowed my eyes at her as I turned my body to face her on the couch.
“You’re what?” I asked.
“I’m sorry,” she said again.
“I heard you. I just don’t believe you.”
“And I don’t blame you for not believing me. I’ve been a raging bitch for a while now, and I owe you an incredible apology.”
My lips parted in shock as my eyes softened.
“Logan is a good man. A great one in fact. He treated me well, but even though we worked in some ways, we didn’t work in the ways that mattered,” she said.
I nodded, afraid that if I spoke, it would ruin the dream I had stepped into.
“Sure, we were sexually compatible, but we were compatible in other ways. We liked some of the same things, enjoyed some of the same vacation destinations. But our futures didn’t line up. He wanted a family. I don’t really want kids. I want to take random weekend trips to places, but he would rather stay cooped up in his condo watching movies and cooking. I enjoy fine dining. I enjoy getting dressed up in heels and jewelry. I like the bold makeup and the night life and the clubs and the fine champagne. I really do enjoy that stuff, and Logan simply didn’t.”
“No, he doesn’t,” I said.
“I wasn’t just with him for his money. The money was nice, especially since I didn’t come from much. I mean, you know that. You know everything about me.”
“I do.”
“My point is, I didn’t like myself when I met my boss.”
“What?” I asked.
“When my boss came to me and ushered me into his office to talk about the promotion, he kissed me. I didn’t kiss him, but he kissed me. It was the first time a man had ever pursued me.”
“Logan pursued you.”
“No, he didn’t. He eventually asked me out, but I called him. I sent him text messages. I was the one who called him every night to wish him good night. He never took the reins with me like he did with you, like he’s doing with you.”
I nodded slowly as tears rose in my friend’s eyes.
“But when my boss kissed me, I felt for the first time what it really meant to be wanted by someone. Yes, he promoted me, but it wasn’t because I was sleeping with him or whatever. He genuinely wanted to give me the job because I had applied for it the moment the position opened up. And after that first kiss, he kept pursuing me, and I didn’t brush him off. Which was my fault, since I was still with Logan.”
“But you enjoyed being pursued.”
“It was more than that. I enjoyed being the object of someone’s affection. Like I said, Logan liked parts of me and I enjoyed parts of him, but we were never a whole unit. I was never enjoyed fully for who I was, just like I never enjoyed him for who he fully was. And during the time when my boss was hitting on me and I was still with Logan, I hated myself for it.”
“Why?” I asked.
“A lot of reasons. I didn’t want to end things with Logan because we did have chemistry in some areas where it mattered. I knew Logan could provide me with a future if I wanted a stable one. My boss—well, he’s more of a free spirit, like I am. Less grounded, with his head in the clouds.”
“Sounds like you, yes,” I said.
“I told Logan I was sleeping with my boss for a raise because when I went to break up with him, I saw the hurt and the anger in his features. He told me he’d been by the club on a night I had told him I was working when I really wasn’t. And when I saw the hurt and the anger run across his face, I felt terrible. My mouth ran away from me to try to somehow makes things better, and I ended up making things worse.”