One More Chance
Page 60
“I believe you, Ana. I do. But that doesn’t stop it from hurting.”
Nodding, I turned my gaze back out to the city lights.
“I want to work on my relationship with my son. I think I deserve that.”
“You more than deserve that,” I said.
“But for now, I’m not sure about my relationship with you.”
“What?” I asked.
He turned his body toward me fully, and I mimicked his motion. I hadn’t heard him right. He couldn’t have possibly said what I thought I had heard.
“You don’t trust me. The fact that you can still think you did the right thing by withholding my son from me means that you didn’t trust me. Up until three days ago, you didn’t trust me.”
“I’ve never not trusted you. This has nothing to do with trust, Tyler.”
“Then you didn’t love me. Those are the only two conclusions I can reach.”
“No, they’re not. Are you even listening to yourself? I loved you so much that I committed to raising our child by myself and pushed you away so you could go off and make your dream reality.”
“You aren’t a martyr, Ana. You made the decision on whether or not you wanted to be a mother—”
“I had no choice in the matter.”
“In this world, a woman has choices. Many in fact. And you chose not only to carry Brody, but to keep him. I, however, didn’t get that choice. So, you either didn’t love me enough to tell me, or you didn’t trust me enough with my own decision-making to tell me.”
It felt like he had punched me in the gut.
“I want a relationship with my son. Had you told me about him, I would have never left. I would have never abandoned you. I would have done anything I could have done to help you through your pregnancy and to help you raise him.”
“And in the end, you would have hated us for it, Tyler! Don’t you get that?”
I could no longer keep my anger in check.
“You would have spent countless hours helping me with feedings only to fall asleep in your mediocre law classes! You would have dropped out of school and taken a job as a cashier or some shit, debasing yourself and that mind of yours just to bring in money to support us! You would have sacrificed your entire world for us! I didn’t want that for you. Does that not count for anything?”
My voice echoed off the trees. I yelled so hard my vision tunneled. My head spun. My body felt weightless. I loved him. I loved Tyler. And he was backing away from me. His hands wrapped around my arms to steady me as I forced my tears to stay at bay. I needed to stay strong.
“That was my decision to make, Ana. That’s my point. You chose the trajectory of my life by withholding information from me. In a court of law, that’s grounds for a mistrial.”
“This isn’t court, Tyler. This is my life. Your life. Our son’s life.”
“A life I want to be a part of. For someone who loves me, this was a hell of a secret to keep. And in my eyes, someone who loves another doesn’t keep things like this from them.”
His hands left my arms, and I listened as his footsteps sounded behind me. I held back my sobs as the glow of the Hollywood sign cloaked my body. I heard his car door open and close. I heard his engine crank up. I heard him inch away, his tires rolling down the road. And as my legs carried me back to my car—away from the patch of grass that seemed to host the most important events in my life—I openly sobbed.
I loved Tyler, and I didn’t know if I’d ever be able to get him back.
My worst nightmare had apparently come true.
Tyler
“Hey there, Tyler.”
“Hey, Ana. I was wondering if Brody had any plans for lunch today.”
“Today?”
“Yeah. It’s been a slow day at the office, and I figured I could take him out to lunch. You know, to talk with him and stuff.”
“Not me and him?”
I closed my eyes and sat back in my chair. I had been afraid of hitting this wall with Ana after our conversation last night.
“Sorry. Um, yeah. He’s free for lunch. He likes that sandwich shop, but I know you don’t like sandwiches. He’s also a fan of that pizza place across town. The one with the play place inside,” she said.
“I figured we could drive around and he could pick us out a place to eat. You know, make it our place.”
“Our place. Like the Taco Hut,” she said.
“Right. Like the Taco Hut.”
“He doesn’t like tacos, so I wouldn’t take him there.”
“Ana.”
“Yeah?”
“It’s just lunch,” I said.
“Hold on. Let me just—hold on. Brody!”
“Yeah, Mom?”
“Can you come here a second?”
I chuckled and closed my eyes as the sound of small footsteps echoed over the phone. I listened in as Ana asked my son if he wanted to get lunch with me. The excitement in his voice warmed my heart.