“They shave polo ponies’ manes and forelocks. It can get tangled in the reins and mallets. It’s called roaching. They also tie up the tails during a match.”
“It looks funny. Horses are meant to have long flowing manes.”
He chuckled. “Don’t let Lucifer hear you say that. He’s pretty particular with how he looks.” It was nice to see Killian teasing and relaxed, almost as if seeing Lucifer did that to him.
“You like him, don’t you?” I said, half turning and tilting my head up so I could see his face.
He nodded, his eyes on Lucifer as he ran his hand up the length of his neck and down again. “Yes. I was fourteen when my father bought him. I normally didn’t pay attention to the horses, but I’d been suspended from school for fighting, so he had me work at the stable for a week mucking out the stalls. Lucifer arrived that week.”
“So he’s old?”
“About fifteen now. But he hasn’t had it easy right from the beginning.”
“What happened to him?”
“Not everyone is gentle starting horses. Breaking a horse is a term that shouldn’t be used, and Lucifer experienced the word to its full capacity.”
Tears filled the lower lids of my eyes as I thought of anyone hurting this magnificent horse.
“As a two-year-old, he already had scars from the unbreakable nylon rope they more than likely tied him up with. The horse breaks before the rope is a motto used.”
My breath hitched. I’d seen the few white hairs across the bridge of his nose, but I hadn’t known it was from scarring. I couldn’t imagine anyone being so cruel to an animal.
“When my father bought him… I remember the look in Lucifer’s eyes. Dead. The fight, spirit, it was gone. I never paid attention to the horses. I was too angry dealing with my own shit to care about them.” He stopped talking while he stroked his hand down Lucifer’s face. “I saw in him what I was afraid one day would happen to me.”
Oh, God. A tear escaped and trailed down my cheek. I had the urge to curl my arms around him, but I couldn’t. We had to maintain some sort of distance, but Killian was making it really hard when he shared personal stuff, because I was betting he didn’t share a lot of himself.
“Did you buy him from your dad? Is that why he’s here?”
He turned toward me, his hip against the stall door, hand absently stroking Lucifer’s muzzle. “I’m paying a kid at my father’s stable to give me proof of any abuse. He gave me something on Lucifer and the authorities went in and removed him. He’s been charged, but it’s only a fine. The charges for animal abuse are unfortunately minimal, and for a man with money, it’s a slap on the wrist. Emily is friends with animal services and had Lucifer brought here.”
“He won’t go back to him?”
Killian snorted. “Fuck no. I’d never allow it. And my father won’t fight for him either. Not now.”
“Why not now?”
Killian put his hand on the small of my back. “Emily wants you to meet Clyde and Dale before brunch.”
There was no fooling myself. I liked his hand on me. I liked being here with him and hearing him talk. He was much more relaxed than he’d been at Compass and the concert as if he let down his wall a little. The good bits of Killian were visible and raw. But he’d avoided the question and that bothered me.
His hand dropped away, and despite my “no touch” rule, I was disappointed. God, that was so wrong. There were so many reasons being with Killian couldn’t work. I’d hooked up with my boss, and it left me without a job, money, or a place to live.
Killian was overbearing and demanding and way too overprotective, which I’d had a taste of already. And I was completely attracted to him. While that was a good thing, it was also bad because I was afraid of losing myself to him in the next month.
I inhaled a deep breath. How was I going to do this? It was day one of our first date.
“You good?” he asked as we walked out to the paddock.
“Yeah. It was nice to meet Lucifer.” And see you like this. “I love the horses, but the closest I’ve been to one is on a calendar. They’re kind of huge.”
He chuckled. “Wait until you meet Clyde and Dale.”
The horses were out grazing in enormous fields as far as the eyes could see. We strolled out to where they were munching on the grass, and the horses came over and nudged us for treats. Killian put a handful of jelly beans in the palm of my hand.
“Jelly beans?”
He grinned. “Less slobbery than apples.” He uncurled my fingers. “Keep your hand flat.” I nodded, and a gray horse gently nibbled the candies out of my palm. I laughed, his muzzle tickling.