Nothing Left to Lose (Guarded Hearts 1)

Without waiting for them, I pressed the call button on the elevator and stepped in when it opened. “You two coming or am I going on my own?” I called teasingly as my finger hovered over the close doors button. Ashton’s hand slammed against the door frame, holding it open as he raised one eyebrow in silent warning and then ushered my two far guards in with me.

As the door closed, I winced in Dean’s direction because he was the one that seemed to have taken the brunt of Ashton’s annoyance. “Sorry. Thanks for doing this guys, I know he’s gonna be calling and being a general pain in the butt until we get back.” I smiled apologetically at the pair of them.

He shook his head and smiled back. “Don’t worry about it, Annabelle, he’s harmless. Well, as long as we bring you home in one piece,” he joked as the elevator lurched down towards the parking lot floor.

An hour and a half later, I had everything that I wanted. “Do you guys mind keeping all of this stuff at yours?” I asked as we pulled up at our apartment.

Dean shrugged. “Yeah, no probs,” he agreed, picking up the numerous bags containing my shopping. “Come on; let’s get you back with Ashton before he has kittens. He’s already called me eight times,” he suggested, grinning.

As soon as I walked through the door of our apartment, Ashton grabbed me into a huge hug; I laughed and hugged him back as he lifted me off my feet so he didn’t have to bend. My legs seemed to act of their own accord as they wound around his waist, clamping myself to him tightly. He carried me into the lounge and sat on the sofa with me still wrapped around him, not wanting to let him go. It was weird being without him actually; I’d missed him so much more than I thought I would. I was certainly used to being around him all day everyday.

“Does our bed smell like sex?” I mumbled into the crook of his neck.

“No. I did her up against the wall,” he answered. I laughed, but part of me was crying out for reassurance. I pulled back to look at him and he put his hands either side of my face, looking me right in the eyes. He looked stressed; his hair was extra messy where he’d probably been running his hands through it a lot. “I missed you,” he whispered. I could see by his fierce expression that he meant it, and it made my heart throb.

“I missed you too,” I admitted. He smiled and pulled my face to his, planting a soft kiss on my lips for a few seconds before pulling me into another hug.

I sighed contentedly against his skin of his neck as I ran my tongue over my bottom lip, wanting nothing more than to press my mouth against his again. His kisses sparked this needy reaction in me every time. “So, what did you do with yourself?” I asked, making no moves to get off his lap.

“Not much. I watched a bit of TV, then worried about you. Went on the internet, then worried about you again. Spoke to Nate, and oh yeah, I worried about you some more.”

I smiled and pulled back to look at him. “You are such an overprotective guy. Seriously, what are you going to do with yourself in six months when you don’t have me to worry about anymore?” I asked, genuinely curious as to what he would do with his spare time.

“I’ll still be worrying about you, trust me,” he answered, stroking my face.

At that moment, my stomach growled loudly. “Wow, embarrassing. Shall we order a pizza? Or maybe Chinese?” I asked, not wanting to cook.

“Yeah okay, I’d probably prefer Chinese,” he agreed.

A little while later the food arrived; I’d already changed into my lounge clothes of tank top and sweats. We ate sitting on the sofa, watching TV, joking around and flicking rice at each other. I hadn’t mentioned his birthday and neither had he. He’d probably forgotten that I even knew the date. Based on what he’d said before about not celebrating Christmas or birthdays, I had the distinct impression that he wasn’t expecting anything for his birthday from anyone.

When we’d finished eating, he settled onto the sofa and found an old horror movie for us to watch while I took the empty plates back to the kitchen. “Come lie with me,” he suggested, holding his arms open for me as I walked back into the room. I went to him immediately. My body just seemed to respond to his every request; it was like I didn’t really have a choice. Smiling to myself, I lay down next to him on the sofa. His arms wound around me tightly, holding me against his chest so that his whole body pressed against mine from behind.

“I really missed you this afternoon,” he whispered.

His words hit me harder than I ever expected them to. “I missed you too, Pretty Boy,” I replied, snuggling into his embrace.

About half way through the movie I lost interest in it, all because Ashton was trailing his fingers along my upper arm. I didn’t think he was even aware he was doing it, but my whole body was almost vibrating with excitement. I couldn’t concentrate on anything other than the smooth silkiness of his fingertips against my skin. I moved my hand back and rested it on his thigh. Scooting backwards, I tried to get impossibly closer to him. Because of the position we were in, I could feel that he was starting to get a little excited downstairs. I gulped at the feel of it as my body seemed to come alive. The desire that I felt for Ashton frightened me, but when it hit me it was almost as if I had no control over myself.

Holding my breath, I rolled over to face him. He smiled that little smile that seemed to make my stomach flutter and my body ache. Needing to be closer, I bent my head and pressed my lips against his. As soon as the kiss started, something inside me snapped, and all my restraint seemed to fly out of the window. He made no moves to do anything else other than kiss me back, the same as always, but I needed him tonight, I couldn’t take it anymore.