My heart broke on a minutely basis.
That was until Jacob’s fourth month and Ren’s oncologist announced he was happy with his results and took him off chemo.
The tumours hadn’t shrunk like last time, but they had stabilised, and he was given a positive outlook again.
It was all agreed that Ren would stay on Keytruda…for the rest of his life. And slowly, as the chemo side effects left his body, he put back the weight he’d lost and ventured outside again where the sun was no longer his enemy.
We’d walk together over the meadows with Jacob in his arms, and we’d soak in the beauty of a sunset, imprinting the memory, clutching it tight for the day when they’d be no more.
Luckily, by the time Christmas arrived, no one would guess Ren was sick.
His smile was broad, strength impressive, and attitude toward life still as vicious and possessive as before.
When summer returned, there was no argument about who would work the fields, and Ren took his place on his beloved tractor, sucking hay, tipping his hat, his skin tanned and glowing.
On our son’s first birthday, he made love to me with such passion and power, he convinced me what we’d lived through was just a nightmare.
A nightmare we’d woken from.
A nightmare we wouldn’t have again.
As his body thrust into mine and his lips cast a spell over my mind and heart, I threw myself into a better dream.
One where Ren would be around to watch his son have his own sons and daughters.
A dream where we grew old together.
And for a while…it came true.
* * * * *
2024
Jacob turned two, and we spent the day with the Wilsons in the old farmhouse.
Cassie helped me bake a cake with two Spiderman candles, and John bounced his honorary grandson on his knee while Ren shared a drink with Liam and Chip on the couch.
So far, 2024 had been the opposite of 2023.
Ren was healthy—in relative terms—and happy.
Jacob was walking and into everything.
And Cassie’s horse business—that she’d named Cherry Equestrian—had been running for six months. So far, she’d broken in three horses and entered one local show-jumping contest where she came second. The prize money was enough to buy more tack and a new saddle.
After an afternoon of birthday presents and eating cake, Jacob passed out as Ren carried him across the field to our house.
Occasionally, he’d cough, but thanks to Keytruda and painkillers, Ren was almost as content as the year when I’d been pregnant and he’d made the impossible possible by building a house, marrying me, and becoming a true Wild.
“By the way, I did what Rick suggested.”
Ren’s voice settled around our feet as the moon cast him in quicksilver shadows.
I looked up, my heart skipping a beat at the sharp lines of his jaw, slight stubble, and perfect lips. His brow was drawn and eyes dark, but his hair danced to its own beat with the slight breeze over the paddock.
“Oh?” I reached out and squeezed Jacob’s tiny foot. It was too irresistible, dangling from his father’s embrace, encased in a miniature sneaker. It constantly amazed me that manufacturers could make adult apparel in toddler sizes.
“About the lawsuit.”
“Ah, right.” I nodded.
Rick had mentioned it to me, too. He’d told me alone, actually. Mentioning the god-awful subject of after.
After Ren was gone.
After.
I hated, hated that word.
Apparently, due to having his life cut short by unnatural means, Ren was fully within his right to claim compensation. There were claimants and lawsuits toward the asbestos company numbering in the thousands, but the successful pay outs were either while the victim was still alive or the person left behind filed within one to two years.
After that, it was too late.
Letting Jacob’s foot go, I shuddered. “I don’t like the thought of benefiting from your…” I swallowed, cursing the familiar sting in my eyes.
Ren shuffled Jacob to one arm, then reached for my hand. His grip was warm and dry and strong. “If it wasn’t for them, I wouldn’t be going anywhere for a very long time.” His voice hardened. “You know I hate charity, but this…it isn’t like that. This is justice. They killed me when I was ten years old, Della. The least they can do is compensate you and Jacob.”
“I’m not taking money from those monsters.”
“But I will.” He squeezed my fingers. “I’d do anything for you. Rick’s already filed my case with a lawyer who has a few active claimants. He said there’s better success in numbers, so he’ll wait for a couple more to come forward and then take it to trial.”
I sighed heavily, kicking at weeds and pulling up the roots out of habit. “When will you know if you win a settlement?”
“Not sure.” He kissed Jacob’s downy blond head. “But hopefully not too long.”
He didn’t say it, but he didn’t need to.