A sound impinged on her consciousness, the sound of footsteps echoing in the cathedral, then of someone calling her name in Zakharan. “Lieutenant Mateja?”
Angelina tore herself away from Alec, just as she had this morning. But this time she didn’t try to pretend she hadn’t wanted him as much as he’d wanted her. This time she didn’t wipe the taste of him away.
“We cannot do this,” she whispered to Alec. “I cannot do this.” Putting on a calm face, she quickly moved out from behind the organ pipes. “I am here,” she told the custodian in Zakharan, thankful she didn’t wear lipstick that would now be smudged. She hoped the wizened little man wouldn’t think to look behind the pipes, wouldn’t ask where Alec was, or he’d wonder what the hell they were doing in that recessed space and put two and two together.
“You said you only needed a half hour,” the custodian reminded her. “It has been almost twice that. It is nearly noon, and I must lock up so I can go to lunch. Are you finished here?”
“Five more minutes,” she promised him. “I will be quick. I only have one more thing to check.”
As soon as the custodian walked away, Alec came out from behind the pipes. She sensed his stare, but refused to meet his eyes, ashamed of what had taken place between them. Any kind of romantic entanglement was incompatible with the life she’d chosen. Every man she’d dated—and there hadn’t been all that many since she’d joined the queen’s security detail—automatically expected that once their relationship grew serious, Angelina would quit her dangerous job.
And that was not going to happen...until Angelina herself determined she could no longer do her job to her own satisfaction. As long as she stayed in peak physical condition, as long as her reaction time meant no one was better than she was at protecting the queen, her choice was clear.
She couldn’t be soft and yielding, not for any man. She couldn’t be anything other than what she was—tough and uncompromising. She couldn’t even pretend...as other women she knew pretended. And that meant the life most Zakharian women took for granted was out of the realm of possibility for her.
Even if she didn’t get involved romantically, even if this was only sex—only sex? she asked herself, remembering how things had exploded between Alec and her—she wasn’t willing to risk her reputation. Things were difficult enough for a woman in the Zakharian National Forces. When sex reared its ugly head, men tended to look at women differently. As if they didn’t already.
This was twice now she had surrendered to her body’s insistent demands. Twice she had let Alec inside her defenses. Twice she had let herself forget who and what she was. And that was two times too many.
Chapter 4
Least said, soonest mended. Alec could hear the words in his head as clearly as if his mother were standing next to him reciting that old maxim. And he knew the wisest course of action was to say nothing to the outgoing RSO. What did you say to a man who was being bounced out of a coveted job to make room for you? Ostensibly because of political favoritism, but really because he was suspected of fraud and corruption?
No, it was better to say nothing at all, not even to commiserate with the guy over being displaced. So he listened politely as the outgoing RSO—a man he’d crossed paths with before—went through his calendar and case roster with Alec.
He noted that the guy had a hard time meeting Alec’s eyes, and his laughter seemed forced—signs of a guilty conscience? Alec wondered. Or just that he doesn’t quite know what to say to me, too, especially since we know each other? It wasn’t unheard of to be replaced on short notice. But it couldn’t be easy. Still, it wasn’t as if he was being demoted. Not exactly. And if he was clean, the DSS would soon place him as RSO somewhere else.
“What’s the ambassador like?” he asked, for something innocuous to say.
“Okay, I guess, for a political appointee.”
Which didn’t tell Alec much. He had an appointment with the ambassador this afternoon, and he was keeping an open mind. Even though the ambassador would also be a target in his upcoming investigation, that was just speculation at this point. The ambassador deserved respect from Alec in every way. At least until something was proved against him. As RSO, Alec was the personal adviser to the ambassador on all security issues, and was responsible for all aspects of the embassy’s security. Conversely, Alec had every intention of using the ambassador as his adviser on all things Zakharian. At least until he got his feet wet.
“Well, I guess that’s about it,” the other man said. “You have the safe’s combination already, but you’ll change it, of course.” He took a set of keys from his pocket and laid them on the desk in front of him. “You’ll need these. Everything there opens a door somewhere in the embassy.” The outgoing RSO smiled briefly, stood and offered his hand.