Rough Love (Tannen Boys 1)

I did that, I think proudly.

Not alone, but I played a major part in it. I changed those boys’ lives for the good the same way so many coaches did for me. Not by waving a magic wand and making whatever good, bad, or ugly shit they have to go through disappear, but by giving them a place where none of it mattered and they could be themselves.

But she’ll be there now, and that changes everything.

“You gave your word.” Mama Louise looks at me, her blue eyes boring into mine in the dark. “Some of those kids have happy homes, never known a day of difficulty, and would bounce right back with no problem. Some of them have had people let them down over and over again. Don’t be one more person to lie to them. They need a strong example, a man who gives his word, follows through even when it’s hard, and doesn’t give up on them. They need you to be Brutal Tannen, football star, and they need you to be Bruce, role model.”

“It’s so hard to see her and not take her in my arms,” I confess, my head dropping back to rest against the chair. “Whatever shit went down before, I still love her. I think I always have. And coaching is going to be damn near impossible with her right there but so out of my reach. She was always out of my reach.”

It’s the most honest thing I’ve ever said to Mama Louise, all my fears and hopes and insecurities laid bare. She presses her lips together, and I get the feeling she’s holding herself back from hugging my neck like one of her boys.

“Fight for the boys first. They’re the priority for the next few weeks.” She nods her head, emphasizing the important truth of her statement.

I think she’s done at first, but after a long beat, she adds. “And along the way, fight for yourself a little too. You said she was in an unhappy marriage and is a single mom now? Get to know her again. Don’t be in love with the girl you knew. Fall in love with the woman she is now. No pedestal, no better than or less than, just two people with a whole lot to build on.”

That’s a lot to swallow and even more to think on. I tell her honestly, “Thank you. I didn’t know I needed this.”

She smiles, all the heaviness of our conversation gone. “You’re not the only observant one around these parts, mister. I’ve got eyes in the back of my head, and you can ask the boys, I know everything that goes on around here.”

“I actually believe that.” She preens under the praise, straightening in her chair and stretching out her denim-clad legs. “You heading in? Want me to close up the kitchen?”

Her gaze ticks back up to the sky. “Nah, I’m gonna finish my drink and talk to John a bit. I’ll take care of the glasses.” She gestures to the empty one in my hand, and I set it on the table next to her for her to clean up.

I step off the porch, walking toward our family homestead a few acres away. Bobby took the truck, so I’m hoofing it. But the quiet night surrounds me like a soothing blanket and I don’t mind the walk. I could use the time to process everything Mama Louise said, and hell, everything I said too.

From the darkness behind me, I hear Mama Louise’s soft voice whisper into the night. “Hey, honey, how was your day?”

I’d been overwhelmingly confused when we first started hanging out with the Bennetts. They all talk about John Bennett in the present tense, like he went to the grocery store and will be right back. But he’s been dead for years now. I’d even worried that Mama Louise might be a little bit bonkers or have a touch of early-onset dementia that her boys were ignoring.

But over the last few months, I’ve realized it’s nothing like that.

Mama Louise is well aware of the fact that John is gone, but her faith that he’s waiting on her in heaven is unshakable. Even in his absence, she loves him with all her heart.

That’s admirable. That’s a love we should all aspire to have, one that transcends time, space, and every obstacle life and death puts in our way.

So if she wants to talk to the night a little, I say let her. I even whisper myself, “Thanks for letting me borrow your girl tonight, Mr. Bennett. She helped this old motherfucker out a lot.”

I swear a star winks back at me, but that’s not possible. Right?

Chapter 16

Allyson

I can’t help but look toward the parking lot for the fifth time in as many minutes.

The boys started their warm-up easily, lining up for their run, and I’d even tacked on one bonus lap while I got my shit straight. Because I am tits-up fucked over.