Before You

I didn’t answer right away.

I let it all simmer for a few seconds—the satiation, the thought of what had just happened between us, how I was still inside her.

“I won’t,” I replied.

Her body relaxed as she heard my answer.

Mine stiffened.

FORTY-FIVE

BILLIE

IT WAS dark in my room when my eyes opened. Jared’s hand was on my stomach, his body pressed against my back, instantly telling me I wasn’t alone. Even if he wasn’t touching me, I’d still be able to smell the subtleness of his scent in the air and feel his presence in my room.

He was just that strong.

And having him here gave me the warmest sensation, an overwhelming spark in my chest, a sexual gnawing that reminded me of the way I had felt last night. That man had a power over me—not just in a way where he owned my body, but he also had the ability to constantly occupy my mind with things other than the crash.

Just like he was doing right now, yet he was still asleep.

Not wanting to wake him, I rolled over as carefully as I could, and I used the tiny bit of light that came in through the windows to see what he looked like in the morning.

There was such a still quietness to his face that he didn’t have when his eyes were open. A level of maturity I’d never experienced before, but I appreciated it even more now that we’d been together. It all felt so right—having him in my bed, seeing him sleep as though the heaviness had been lifted from his head.

And as if he agreed, he slowly opened his eyes.

As a protector, he must have sensed my stare, and I wasn’t shocked that he had. I was just glad I’d gotten a few seconds to enjoy his peacefulness before I was hit with the intensity of his eyes.

“Good morning,” he whispered. He raised his hand from under the sheet and touched my cheek, his thumb so warm as it brushed my skin.

Now that the blanket had moved down a little, I glanced at his chest, at the dark hairs that covered it and how it was just the right amount. “Morning.” I nuzzled his palm, closing my eyes as his scent turned stronger. I would remember it anywhere.

“Do you know what time it is?”

It was Friday. I’d forgotten Jared probably had to go to work.

I glanced behind me at the clock on the nightstand and said, “A little past seven,” before I turned around again.

His hand went back to my face. “Did you sleep?”

“Yes.” I smiled because it felt so good to say that. “A solid four hours and then off and on for another two. You?”

His thumb pressed the corner of my mouth. “Same.”

“When was the last time you could say that?”

He didn’t respond right away. It didn’t seem like he had to think about it, more like he was just realizing how far he’d come. “Before the crash.”

Something wasn’t being said, and I sensed we both knew it.

He had been so adamant about us not getting together, warning that all it would do was hurt us. But I didn’t understand how last night could be a mistake, especially when he had slept and I had woken up with the lightest feeling in my chest.

“See, I’m good for you.” More sunlight was trickling into the room, so I knew he could see my smile. When his grip tightened, I took that as his reply and asked, “Do you have time for breakfast?”

He nodded, and I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his cheek, taking in the scent of his beard. There were so many traces of us in that hair, of the hours we’d spent tasting and pleasing. We had moved to the shower and then the kitchen, and we’d ended on the bench in front of my bed. At least an hour of conversation had followed about our lives before we finally fell asleep.

I hated the thought that he would soon have to leave.

“Give me a few minutes,” I said softly, kissing the same spot, and then I pulled away and climbed out.

Knowing he was staring at my nakedness, I gradually walked across my room to the bathroom, eventually shutting the door behind me. I’d felt his eyes on me the whole way. That was one of the reasons my face was flushed when I looked at myself in the mirror above the sink. The other reason was because it had been a while since I felt this way about a man, and the thought of Jared was burning through me.