Her hands rubbed the back of my neck, her skirt rising up because of the way she sat, a glimpse of her panties visible.
Normally, I was in the mood every time I saw her, but today, I was too empty.
“The worst part is over, at least.”
“No…it’s just begun.” I pulled my head back and looked at her. “The older he gets, the less he needs me. The less often I’ll hear him call me Dad. The less often he’ll ask me to help him with his models, ask to go to the cabin. Who knows what he’ll be like as a teenager…may not even want to be around me. That’s less than ten years away.”
She played with the back of my hair. “You still have a lot of time left, Deacon.”
“I know, but it’ll go by so quickly.”
“And a lot of great things will happen as he ages. Someday, you won’t have to be just his father anymore. You’ll be his friend instead. The way your father was your friend. And that’s something a lot of parents look forward to, when they’ve raised a good person they want to be around.”
“I guess that’s true.”
“I know it’s hard, but you aren’t losing him.” She rubbed my shoulder. “No matter how old he gets, he’ll always be your son. He’ll always be your little boy.”
My driver dropped me off, and I met Valerie on the sidewalk.
She was still in a somber mood, as if the day hadn’t made her feel better. “I wonder if it’ll be easier when I drop him off tomorrow…or the day after that.”
“It has to be. Otherwise, no one would want to be a parent.” We walked together into the school, waiting at the parent pickup spot.
She crossed her arms over her chest and waited for the bell to ring. “How was your day?”
“Long.”
She watched me with remorse in her gaze. “Couldn’t focus?”
I shook my head. “It was just rough, thinking about how quickly time has gone by…how it speeds up with every passing year. Einstein’s theory of relativity applies in more ways than he realized…”
She didn’t seem to understand what that meant but didn’t ask. “I was wondering if I could drop him off at your place tonight around five. You can pick drop him at school in the morning, and I’ll pick him up afterward.”
It was a sudden change in topic, so I eyed her in surprise. “Sure. Why?”
“I have a date.”
“Oh…” I was surprised she was so upfront about it. Maybe she was trying to make me jealous since she’d asked me to watch him all night, like she intended to be busy all through the evening. But if anything, I was relieved she was moving on. “That’s no problem.”
She watched me, as if she was expecting a reaction. “He lives in the building.”
That didn’t surprise me. “A lot of rich men do.”
“He’s young and handsome. Recently divorced.”
“Sounds perfect.” I took everything Valerie said with a grain of salt. I wanted to believe she’d met someone and she was genuinely moving on, that she would be in a good place when I told her about Cleo. But she liked to manipulate me, so this might be another ploy. I didn’t ask who he was since I didn’t know any of my neighbors. I kept to myself, and they did the same. It was another reason I was sad to leave.
“His name is Jake.” She supplied the information I didn’t ask for. “Jake Patterson.”
I didn’t say anything, but I wanted to grimace at the name. I still wanted to punch him in the face for the way he’d yelled at Cleo. If he ever pulled that shit again, I really would break his face in all the right places so it would be difficult for a surgeon to fix it. “Have a good time.”
Her eyes narrowed.
The bell rang, and the kids started to file out.
Kids were everywhere, moving to the line of buses to escort them home, finding their parents in the crowd. A few minutes passed before Derek walked out with three boys around him, all talking and laughing. He wasn’t even looking for me.
“Looks like he’d made friends,” Valerie said.
“Yeah…looks like it.” My son wasn’t just like me. He knew how to connect with people in a way I couldn’t. It made me proud.
Derek said goodbye to his friends then found us. “Dad!”
I inhaled a deep breath when I heard him say that, like his newfound friends didn’t change his affection for me. He didn’t dump me the second he found someone better. He was still happy to see me.
“Mom!” He ran to us, his backpack bobbing up and down as he sprinted.
I kneeled and caught him, hugging him tightly, squeezing him with my hands. “Hey, little man. How was school?”
“It was awesome! I was brave like you told me to be.”