The Man Who Has No Love (Soulless 3)

So basically, I couldn’t even tell people I’d worked here. “Alright.”

He sighed again. “Well…good luck.”

So, this conversation wasn’t compassionate at all. It was just to scare me. “You too, Mr. Kline.” I opened the door and got out of the car, carrying my box of things down the street. When I made it to the corner and crossed, the tears started.

And I sobbed the whole way home.

Thirteen

Deacon

Valerie gave me the cold shoulder after I told her how I felt about Cleo.

As a result, I didn’t get to see Derek.

I texted her a few times and got no response.

Since Derek was in the building and I could get to him if I really needed to, I let it go.

Besides, I was in a dark place anyway.

I hadn’t been this pissed off in a long time, not since Valerie wouldn’t let me see Derek after I moved. I’d screamed at her over the phone, overwhelmed by the bullshit. Now I felt that way…but a million times worse.

I focused on my research and spent the week at the hospital doing my patient care.

I brought my own lunch—because I wouldn’t ask Cleo for a damn thing.

Like I asked, Matt handled everything for me. He took care of my groceries and dry cleaning, picking up where Cleo left off like she’d given him a detailed explanation of every little item I needed.

And I didn’t see him often either. He usually took care of everything before I came home. I was working late hours, so that wasn’t surprising.

I sat at the desk on the cancer ward, all my notes around me while the patient charts were open on my computers.

Dr. Hawthorne pulled up a chair on wheels and took a seat, wearing light blue scrubs with her hair pulled back. “Guess what?” She placed the papers in front of me, lab results that had just come back. After the charity dinner, she’d acted like nothing awkward had happened, returning to professionalism. If she had been hitting on me, she didn’t admit it.

I grabbed the papers and flipped through them. “Is this from today?”

“A couple hours ago.”

I checked the numbers twice. “This is great…”

“I know. My patient’s numbers have dropped incredibly. Cholesterol is down, so the treatment is reducing the chronic inflammation in the body. I’m going to give him another dose and see if these numbers get even better.”

These were the moments I lived for—when we actually made a difference. But I wasn’t as excited as I usually was because there was so much shit going on in my personal life.

Dr. Hawthorne must have gotten to know me well enough over the last few weeks to recognize my moods, to know something was wrong. “Everything alright, Deacon? You seem a bit…distracted.” Since my reaction wasn’t that big, maybe it was a dead giveaway.

“I’ve just…got some stuff going on.”

“Anything I can do to help?”

“No.” I wished I had someone to talk to about this. Cleo was my person, but I couldn’t talk to her. She gave me space like I’d asked, didn’t text me at all, even though we hadn’t spoken in over a week. “I’m having relationship problems…”

She nodded slowly. “With Cleo?”

I turned to her, surprised by her accurate guess.

She sighed loudly. “I’m really sorry about that whole thing. If I’d known—”

“Please don’t apologize.” I was embarrassed we were having this conversation at all because of Cleo’s stupidity.

“Well, if these problems are caused by that night—”

“They aren’t. I just found out some stuff about her…and I’m not sure how I feel about it.”

She was quiet for a while, like she didn’t know what to say. “Well, if you ever need someone to talk to, you have my number. I’m not a relationship guru or anything, but I am a woman and I do share your intellect. I might be able to give you some advice.”

“I basically found out she lied to me…about some serious stuff.” I didn’t know why I was talking to her. I guess I was just so lonely. I didn’t want to talk to Tucker about it because I already knew what his response would be.

She nodded slowly. “All I know is trust is pretty important in a relationship. And if it’s not there, nothing is there.”

Tucker texted me. Hey, favorite brother in the entire world. I’ve got a favor to ask.

I was in the back seat of the car on my way home from work. I’m your only brother.

Therefore, you’re my favorite.

What do you want? It’d been almost two weeks since Cleo and I had parted ways. Time passed quickly because I focused on work so much. But it also passed slowly because I was angry, sad, miserable…and everything in between.

Can I use your beach house this weekend? He sent a grinning face emoji.

I’d probably never use it again, so I didn’t give a damn. Yes. The place was haunted by Cleo’s ghost, by the happy weekend we’d had there, the two of us…in love. I wasn’t sure if I could go to the cabin either, not for a long time. It was supposed to be a special place for Derek and me…but she somehow became a part of that.