Would she be upset about Roman and me? Abigail was sweet, a nurse who helped others and put herself last. But this was different. This was about her son, someone she was highly protective of.
She could see this as a betrayal. But as I looked at her face, at her kind brown eyes, the same ones as Roman, I didn’t think she would think it was wrong at all. The person I was mainly concerned about was my father.
“I’m fine,” I lied easily, but gave her a genuine smile.
She knitted her brows, easily seeing through my lie. “Are you sure? You seem like there’s something troubling you. I noticed it soon as you and Roman showed up. You seem very tense.”
“I’m okay. I just have a lot of things on my mind.” It was another lie, but I was definitely evading her question.
She reached across the table and patted my shoulder before standing and heading over to where her husband stood. I stared at them for a moment, picturing all the ways this scenario could play out.
Of course, it was them hating me, the family breaking up, everyone in disarray. Although I was probably overreacting. Roman and I were adults. It’s not like we were blood cousins or anything, not like we were doing anything illegal. But family dynamics were tricky, sensitive. People handled them differently.
Once the food was at the table, everyone gathered around and started eating. The conversation was light, the atmosphere easygoing and comfortable. Roman sat beside me, seeming collected and calm, but I knew him well enough that inside he was probably working this all out, playing out the scenarios of how things could go.
Deciding if he’d be gruff in their disapproval of our relationship, defensive.
But it had to be said today. We had to be honest with our family because hiding, lying, and sneaking around was just not something either of us wanted to do anymore.
I leaned in and said softly to Roman, “Are you as nervous as I am?” The conversation between our families was thick, so they didn’t notice how close Roman and I were at this moment.
He looked at me and grinned. “Nah, baby.”
I felt my cheeks heat at his endearment. I glanced around quickly, seeing if anyone had heard him, or watched us.
He chuckled softly. “It’s all good. They don’t even notice us. Look, your dad and mine are too heavy into talking about the football game tomorrow.”
I smiled, hating that I even cared if they saw us.
“Roman, honey,” Abigail said, and I straightened away from him probably far too fast, looking guilty as hell.
“How’s school, Kennedy?” Catherine asked, and I glanced over at her, feeling my face heat instantly, unable to stop the “guilty” reaction I had.
“I-it’s going well.”
“Kennedy is on her way to getting a four-point-oh this semester.” My father sounded proud.
“Dad,” I said, embarrassed by his praise.
And as I looked at everyone, I realized that I didn’t want to wait to tell them, that we’d already kept it to ourselves too long as it was. I looked at Roman and saw him already watching me, could see from his expression and the way he smiled at me that he was on the same page.
“Dad,” I said while looking at Roman. I forced myself to glance at my father, then at Catherine. “Abigail, Martin.” I looked at Roman’s parents then.
“Everything okay?” Catherine was the one to speak, the concern in her voice thick.
I nodded. “I’m fine. It’s just that … well.” God, my throat felt so tight, so thick. I stared at my hands, which were in my lap, my fingers twisted together.
Just say the words. Just tell them the truth.
When I looked back at Roman, I could see the worry on his face. He was nervous, I could see it, feel it.
“It’s okay,” he whispered. “I’m here no matter what.”
And it was that reassurance that gave me the strength I needed. So, taking that deep breath I needed to feel stabilized, I just said the words. “I love Roman.” God, they were out there, the words that could break all of this. No one spoke, and I felt this awkwardness surround me, claiming me, taking me under.
“I don’t understand,” Abigail said.
“I’m in love with Kennedy,” Roman said.
“In love?” Martin said with a bit of shock in his voice.
“Yes,” I said. “I’m in love with Roman.”
My heart felt like it would burst through my chest, this static filling me, white noise drowning out everything else, filling my ears and sounding deafening.
“I-I don’t know what to say,” Catherine said as she looked between all of us, her eyes wide. She was the only one who looked downright shocked by the revelation.
“Let me get this straight,” my father finally said, and I held my breath, felt my heart stop in my chest. I didn’t want him making a scene.