I push myself up on my hands and knees and then slowly get off the floor. I walk over to the bars of the cell and grip them to steady myself. I take a deep breath to try and tell if Winnie is close, but all I can smell is the lingering drugs.
The drugs are in my system, but I’m a shifter, and I know they’ll fade fast. In a few minutes they’ll be completely gone, and there isn’t a cell on this earth that will keep me from my mate.
“Where is she?” My voice is deep and gravely, as if I haven’t used it in a while. I feel my wolf pacing inside me, not liking the feeling of being caged. I take a deep breath and try to gain some control. Losing it won’t get me anywhere, and as an alpha, I need to show that I can control my own wolf.
“She’s upstairs talking to Gwen. She wants to talk to you, but she wants to do it while you’re behind bars. She’s not ready to be your mate, and she wanted you to listen to her,” X says. He always gets straight to the point.
“I’m no danger to her. I’m her mate. I will always protect her. Now let me out of here.” I grip the bars tighter, needing to get out. This is insanity. Why doesn’t she want me? Doesn’t she feel the pull like I do?
“I think bears are different than us. Gwen is explaining to her what she should be feeling, and that’s not what’s happening to Winnie. She’s mad you pushed her away for so long. You were not a worthy friend, so she thinks you won’t be a worthy mate.”
His words hit me like a boulder to the chest, the pain bleeding down to my heart. I need to make this right. I will beg her to forgive me. I will crawl through broken glass if that’s what she asks. She is mine, and I will prove to her that I never meant to hurt her.
“Please.” It’s a word I never have to use as alpha, but it comes so easily when it comes to her. I lean my forehead against the bars. “Please, Xavier. I need to speak to her. It hurts.” I know he recognizes the pain I’m feeling because I once caused him to feel it.
The ache in my chest is growing and spreading through my body. Being separated from your mate is painful in the beginning, especially if the mating heat starts. I just had no idea how bad it could be. I’ve heard people explain it before, but this…I never thought it could hurt this deep. Down to the marrow of my bones.
“I know all about that pain you speak of, Stone. You remember when you locked me away in this cage? I will be better to you than you were to me. But you will hear Winnie out first.”
I look up into his eyes, and I see that I was wrong in how I treated him. I nod slowly, recognizing that I didn’t do right by him and Gwen when they were going through their mating heat. It seems everything I think is for the best keeps blowing up in my face. What kind of alpha does that make me?
X turns, walking away and going up the stairs. After what feels like hours, but is probably only minutes, he comes back downstairs, followed by Winnie.
“I will be over here if you need me. I’ll try not to listen, but I probably will because my hearing is better than yours,” X tells Winnie, before walking over to the corner of the room and sitting down.
I look to Winnie, and after she takes a deep breath, she looks up, her big brown eyes locking with mine.
“I’m sorry—” I start to apologize, but she holds her hand up to stop me.
“Stone. All I ever wanted was your attention. You were my first memory, my first piece of anything that was good, and you pushed me away. Over the years, I tried to be your friend, and even that was difficult for you. And now you show up, saying I’m your mate and we’re going to be together, but I don’t feel that.” She looks away and whispers, “I don’t know what I feel.”
“Please, Winnie. Let me fix this.”
Her eyes shoot up, locking with mine again. “You can’t just fix this, Stone. You have to prove it to me. If you want me, you’ll wait for me. You’ll give me time—”
“Anything,” I cut her off, but she shakes her head.
“You’ll give me time and space, Stone. I need to figure out what this is,” she says, gesturing between the two of us. “X is going to let you out, but I’m not going with you. If you can’t handle that, then Dominic has offered to keep you drugged until the needing passes.”
She looks away as if the thought hurts her, and the idea of not needing her tears me apart inside.
“Please.” I get down on my knees in the cell, not caring if X watches. “Winnie. Don’t leave me in here. I’ll give you time.” I take a deep breath, closing my eyes and opening them again. “And space, if that’s what you need.”
After a moment, she nods, coming to a decision. “Okay. I’m leaving. X will let you out when I’m gone.”
Her words are like an arrow to my heart, and I don’t think I’ll be able to function. But I can do this. I can stay strong and show her that I’m good enough for her.
I watch as she climbs the stairs and leaves the room, taking my heart with her. I will give her what she wants, but I won’t stop making her want me.
3
Winnie
Lying back on my bed, I stare at the wooden ceiling of the attic. How many nights have I lain here, wanting Stone to notice me? Every single one of them. It’s stupid. I should embrace this. It’s what I’ve always wanted, but now it just feels tarnished.