“I’ll come back.”
She shook her head. “Don’t say that unless you can promise me.” She cupped his neck and pressed her forehead to his. “Can you promise me you’ll come back?”
Her tears dripped between them. He fisted her hair.
“Say it.” She sniffled. “Promise me.”
“I can’t.”
Jude would have said that moment—the heart-breaking dream-shattering moment—was the reason to never get emotionally involved.
Not Jackson.
He loved Ryn Middleton with something bigger than his heart. She dug deep and found his soul, and she would forever have a piece of it.
He kissed her, wanting her to be the last thing he ever tasted. He slid his hands up the back of her shirt, wanting her skin to be the last thing his hands ever felt.
“Stop.” She turned her head to break their kiss. They stood as one, two bodies clutching each other, begging the world to not tear them apart.
“Let me be with you … one last time. Let me make love to you,” he whispered in her ear.
“I can’t.” Her body shook in his arms. “I can barely breathe. This hurts so fucking bad.”
Ryn looked up at him. Her fingers feathered over his lips. He closed his eyes.
“Making love … knowing it’s the last time, would literally Stop. My. Heart.”
Step One: Confess the mercy killing first.
Step Two: Wait for Ryn to acclimate to Jackson’s ability to take another’s life.
Step Three: Make her fall so deep in love with him that not even the assassin confession could drive her away.
Step Four: Be prepared to gently hold her in captivity until she snaps out of her inevitable conniption fit because realistically there is no way Step Three would ever fly.
Step Five: Let her go.
“Okay.” He swallowed every ounce of fucking reality and took a step back.
She hugged herself. He fisted his hands, hating that they would never touch her again. Then he opened the door.
“Jackson?”
He turned.
“Tell me to wait for you.”
Forty. The stunning woman before him was forty. She survived years of abuse. Her best friend was a dog. Her daughter hated her. If only one person in the world deserved true happiness, it was Ryn. Waiting for a maybe, a complete shot in the dark, would only lead to more misery. He loved her too much.
A long, slow sigh deflated his lungs like life itself tried to escape his body. Lowering his chin to his chest, he refused to look at her. “Don’t wait for me.” He said his final words in a thick voice and closed the door.
Chapter Thirty-One
Jackson needed to break something or someone. As if the universe heard his need, Luke’s rental car was parked in one of the spots between the townhouses. He pulled into the garage and hopped out just as Luke got out and walked into the garage.
“Jess—”
“Inside.” Jackson cut him off, leading him in the house. “Jillian has been gone too fucking long. I need to exercise. You know how to throw a punch, Jones? Or take one?” He inwardly smirked. That crawling-out-of-his-skin feeling wore on his last nerve. He needed to destroy something. Why not start with the reason for his leaving Ryn?
“I’m not going to fight you.”
Jackson shrugged off his shirt and walked into his bedroom. “That’s fine. All I really need is a body. I just need to feel the pain of my knuckles cracking against bone. You don’t mind, do you? After all, you showed up and ruined my whole fucking life.”
“Call Knox.”
Jackson grabbed a pair of shorts then pulled at the button to his jeans. “I did. Haven’t heard back. He’s a prick that does everything on his time.”
“She wasn’t at the funeral.”
Jackson froze then inched his head up. “What the fuck did you just say?”
“I talked to Lilith. Jessica wasn’t at the funeral.”
Jackson pulled his phone from his pocket and called Knox again. Again, it went to voicemail. “Where the fuck is she?”
Next he texted him.
I’m coming for you, asshole.
Jackson grabbed a small bag and shoved a few items into it, including his computer and a thick wad of cash from his dresser drawer.
“Where are we going?”
“I’m going to get my sister. You’re going home and I don’t want to see you again. Are we clear?”
“I’m going with you or you’re going to kill me. It’s one or the other.”
Jackson looked up from his bag. He didn’t hate Luke. He hated that life. Luke brought it back.
“I’m tired of living without her.”
Jackson nodded. With the fresh image of Ryn emotionally shattered in his arms, he knew how Luke felt, which meant it was best to put him out of his misery. “I can break your neck or I’m good with a knife too. Your choice.”
Luke’s temporary stay of execution came from a knock at the door. Jackson sighed, aggravation building to an all-time high as he came close to tearing the front door off its hinges. A lethal dose of adrenaline poisoned his bloodstream.