Together we watch her finger teasing my waistband … teasing the head of my erection strained against it. I whisper, “Lower.”
On a breathless laugh, she withdraws her finger and retreats a step. “Nothing good can come from that.”
I tug on my shirt and suffocate my dick behind my zipper. “I beg to differ.”
“Thank you.”
When our eyes lock again, something more serious, more sincere, ghosts across her face.
“For sex?” I cock my head a fraction.
A tiny smile curls her lips. “No. Well … yes. Kind of.” She shrugs. “After Kyle and Emily died, I struggled to feel much of anything. It was oddly familiar. I’ve been there before.”
I don’t say it because she hasn’t told me, but Mr. Hans did. She’s referring to the boyfriend she lost. I want to ask, even though I shouldn’t want to ask. We can’t make this personal. The freckles all by themselves will make it hard to say goodbye.
“And then I had this huge responsibility. A ten-year-old. Panic … the first real and visceral feeling I had after they died was panic, but you …” Her lips submit to a full smile. “You’ve made me feel something besides panic. So, thank you.”
After thinking of the correct, kind, yet not-too-sentimental response, I nod once. “You’re welcome. For the sex. It’s the least I can do.”
She curls her hair behind her ears. “How long has it been since your parents have seen you and Morgan?”
“Eight years.”
Her eyes double in size. “Seriously?”
I nod. “I offered several times to fly them to different locations like Paris and Tel Aviv, but my mom has bad arthritis, so they don’t go to many places.”
“And you never went home? In eight years, you never dropped by home to do a few loads of laundry or spend the holidays with your family?”
“Nope. This is the first time we’ve been back in the United States since we left. I figure once I put her in school, we can travel the states over breaks and summers. Road trips.”
Gracelyn nods before her face wrinkles into a confused expression. “Gosh, I wonder if Gabe is expecting me to take him on vacations. I mean … places besides Montana to visit my parents.”
“Did Kyle and Emily travel with him?”
“Yeah. I mean, some. Not every spring break, but I feel like they always took a summer trip. All of his friends have been going places. I was grateful to Mr. Hans for taking him to Disney, even if it was only for two days.”
I nod. “I was grateful for that too.”
She rolls her eyes. “I’m sure you were.”
“I’m grateful he invited Morgan and Gabe to the hardware store today—even if I’m not happy she went without asking my permission.”
Gracelyn possesses the unrestrained giggle of a young girl with a gleam in her eye that no amount of tragedy has managed to steal. While I first noticed a shadow of familiarity in her hair, a whisper from my past, it’s all the tiny things unique to her that make it hard to look away and hard to hide this grin. I fear being her pen pal will feel like a crushing consolation prize in five weeks.
“You should bring your parents here for the Fourth of July, but don’t ask for Morgan’s thoughts on it. Just do it and surprise her. My parents are coming for the holiday.”
I sit on the edge of the bed and frown. “Sounds like a busy, sexless gathering for the Fourth.”
The corner of her mouth twitches. “That’s not entirely true. My parents have sex every night—still—with few exceptions. It’s always been one of my mother’s June Cleaver, Suzy Homemaker roles.” She fights the full-on grin. “When she explained the birds and the bees—yes, that’s exactly what she called it too—she put it in the context of a goodnight kiss between married people. Something married couples do after they brush their teeth and turn off all the lights. She still says to my dad, ‘Bill, time to turn in and get things done.’” More giggles. “Get. Things. Done. Who says that? I’ll tell ya who … my mom.”
I chuckle, shaking my head. “How does your dad react?”
“Oh god …” Running her fingers through her hair, she blows out a long breath. “That’s the best part. He swats her ass and says, ‘I’m ready anytime you are.’ And in case you think I made false assumptions about this, I didn’t. The walls in their house are thin; the bed creaks like an old swing, and my dad grunts like an animal in the desert using his last few breaths to make it to a water hole.”
Snorting, I fist my hand at my mouth and shake with silent laughter.
“Don’t laugh.” She waggles a finger at me. “I’ve been assured it’s the secret to a long and happy marriage. Not that I’ll ever know.” Her brow furrows.