Perfectly Adequate

I let his words swirl around in my head, finding a way to make sense of them, finding a place to keep them. But they don’t fit in my mind, so I tuck them away in my heart because that’s where they landed when he said them. “For the record…” I grab workout clothes from my closet “…loving you has been unexpectedly good.”

“Good?” He chuckles.

“Perfectly adequate.”

“Doesn’t get any better than that.” He pushes to sitting.

“Let me help.”

“I’m good. Well, if you could unzip the bed, I’d be good. I just need to make my way to the bathroom.”

I unzip his side of the bed. “How are you getting home? Don’t you have brunch today?”

“Mom is bringing brunch to my house. My sisters and their families are coming over too. This is really the day for you to skip work to come to brunch.”

I help him get up and situated with his crutches. “Sounds like the perfect family gathering. Roman should be pretty excited. And Dr. Hathaway, I assume, will be there. So that’s good … oh … was she at your house last night? I mean … how did you coming over here go over with her?”

“I don’t know.” His words are a bit strained as he takes his first few steps toward the bathroom with the crutches. “I didn’t tell her I was coming here. It was a spontaneous, last minute decision. They were at the park. But my mom went back there after she dropped me off here, so Julie found out eventually.”

“I bet she was pissed off. I hope not at me. I didn’t invite you over last night.”

Eli glances back over his shoulder. “If you didn’t look up to Julie, at least on a professional level, would you still think I should be with her?”

“If you could love each other, then yes. For Roman … absolutely.”

“Jesus …” he mumbles, continuing toward the bathroom.

“What?” I follow him around the corner.

“If you’re not going to let me be with you, then stop making it so easy to love you.” He pushes the door shut behind him.

I leave. He seems a little upset. I thought we were okay, but maybe we’re not. When I get to work, Mom messages me to let me know that his dad picked him up.

I really should not have fallen in love with Dr. Hawkins. What was I thinking?

* * *

Elijah

I need a shower.

Instead, I receive the Sunday brunch welcome wagon as soon as my dad helps me inside my house. I feel like an errant child who just got dragged home from a friend’s house after breaking curfew. Except my mom took me to Dorothy’s house, so I have no reason to feel guilty.

“Hey.” I give my family a tight-lipped smile as I enter the family room filled with my sisters, their families, Mom, Roman playing with his older cousins, and Julie.

Julie … she shifts her gaze to the floor as soon as I look at her. She makes me feel guilty, which is insane. Julie has no right to make me feel guilty for anything. But this voice in my head (Dorothy’s voice) keeps scolding me for pining after another woman when I have the opportunity to put my family back together.

For Roman. Anything for him.

Mom and my sisters have smirks on their faces, like I got away with something, and they’re dying to know the details. The details? Ha! That’s easy.

I poured my heart out to Dorothy and she rejected me.

The apple pie was good.

And from the way it sounded, her orgasm was too.

That pretty much sums up the previous evening.

“I’m starving,” I say, instead of explaining my absence.

“Yes! Let’s eat.” Mom herds the gang into the kitchen until I’m left alone in the living room with Julie.

“How was the park?” I ask.

“He had fun. Wet the bed, probably from too much water. I already have it cleaned up.”

“Thanks.”

She nods.

“Are you going to avoid looking at me all day?”

She lifts her gaze, wearing a forced smile, a mask that does little to hide her anger or disappointment. I can’t tell which one. “Good morning, Elijah.”

Hurt. She’s hurt.

Julie has no right to be angry. I know this, and I can tell by the somber expression on her face that she knows it too. But heartache is immune to reason. That, I know all too well.

“Good morning.”

She clears her throat. “How is Dorothy?”

An instant smile comes to my face, in spite of the immediate pain. “She’s good.”

Julie presses her lips together and nods. “That’s good.” Her words carry no bitterness.

The women in my life have a knack for being their most amazing selves when I really need them to show me their dark side. Their anger. Their jealousy and selfishness.

“She thinks I should try to put my family back together—for Roman.”

Julie’s gaze snaps up to meet mine as her lips part. “Wh …” She shakes her head like she can’t believe what I said. “Well, what do you think?”