“It’s gotta be hard—but we’re worth it.”
“Heath—”
“No.” My breath came out shaky, because I’d never wanted something so much in my entire fucking life. She was everything to me, my family, my best friend, my woman. “You told me you would give me a chance. You have yet to do that.”
She slowly turned to me, finally revealing her entire face, all the damage her sobs had caused. “He said letting you live is the hardest thing he’s ever had to do, but he did it for me. That’s the most he can give.”
“You’d be surprised what a man can give when he loves someone…” I believed Damien could give more, if he had more time to let the past become the past. Everything happened only a month ago. It was practically the present.
“I can’t live this way, Heath.” She shook her head. “I’m so close to my family. I go over there all the time, play chess with my father, have dinner with everyone all the time… I can’t lose that.”
“You never will.”
“But it’s already different.”
“I won’t come to your shows anymore. We won’t go out in public anymore.”
“And that’s not the relationship I want to have. Don’t you see that?”
“It’s just temporary.” I had to keep my voice controlled even though I wanted to let my emotions out of the cage and burst from my lips. “I know you’re upset right now. I’m sure he said things that hurt you—”
“My brother has never spoken to me like that before.”
“Because he’s upset—and he’s entitled to be upset. But I’m telling you, those emotions will fade…in time. You need to give me time.”
She turned away again.
No.
“I’m sorry…I am.”
“I don’t accept that.”
“Well, you have to.” She got to her feet and let the blanket slide off her legs and back to the floor. “Please don’t make this more difficult for me. I told him how I felt about you. I told him I want to be with you…even marry you someday. And it didn’t make a difference.” She placed her hand over her eyes, like she didn’t want me to see her cry. “I don’t have the strength to have this conversation with you, to have this argument, especially when I’m not going to change my mind. So please…just go.” She walked behind the back of the couch then across the kitchen, moving slowly like her body was broken, and then entered her bedroom. She shut the door behind her. And then it went quiet.The guards stopped me at the entryway.
“No more money for you.”
My emotions were at the surface, a combination of rage, ferocity, and agony. So, I didn’t have the patience for this. I yanked the rifle out of one of the guard’s hands, smacked him hard in the head, and did the same to the other guard before he could move his finger to the trigger. I dropped the gun and entered the building.
Damien must have known I was coming because the other guards stood down on my way. I took the stairs then crossed the concrete floor as his crew prepared the next shipment to be dispersed across the country.
Some stopped to look at me.
I approached the office door, which was halfway open. He sat at the desk, relaxed in the chair like he was prepared for a long conversation.
I shut the door behind me and approached his desk, staring at his aloof features without saying a word. I hadn’t prepared a speech. I hadn’t asked my brother for advice. After my conversation with Catalina, I knew that I had to do something now, not later, that I was fighting for the single thing that mattered to me.
He propped his cheek on his closed knuckles, regarding me with indifference.
There was a beast inside my chest, trying to break free so he could crush Damien’s skull, cause him pain. I was a fucking volcano of agony, constantly spewing lava packed with my heartbreak. “Please.” That was all I could manage to get out, to convey my desperation, to show this man I had no pride when it came to the woman I loved.
He dropped his hand and straightened in his chair, regarding me with the same coldness.
“I love her. Please don’t do this to me.”
He watched me without blinking, a dead look in his eyes.
“I’ll do whatever you want, Damien. Name it. I’ll do it.”
He cocked his head slightly. “All I want is for you to disappear.”
I closed my eyes hard, my hands tightening into fists at the same time. When I opened my eyes again, I could feel the moisture coating them, feel a sensation I hadn’t felt in so long I wasn’t even sure what was happening.
He continued to stare at me, heartless.
“I love her so fucking much. Please.” I locked my gaze with another man, tears in my eyes, so desperate, I didn’t even try to hide them, didn’t feel any shame for wearing my heart on my sleeve.