Aria sank down on the edge of the bathtub. “Are you sure you can do the same? Accept all of him, even the bad?”
There was plenty of bad in Matteo, in every Made Man really, but I’d come to realize that there was in me as well. Maybe not as much, but it was there. It was in all of us. I’d tried to become someone else, some kind of ideal I’d thought I needed to be, but that had never been me and never would. Matteo had held up a mirror to my face and showed me who I really was and where I belonged. I’d hated it, had fought it tooth and nail, but it was time to be brave.
“Yes. I love him, the bad and the good,” I said firmly. Aria smiled as if I’d given her some huge present. Smiling back, I turned the water on, and really let the words sink in, their truthfulness.
I’d never be okay with everything Matteo did, would never do even half of the things he had done and was going to do in the future. But I’d realized I didn’t have to be happy about every aspect of his life. As long as Matteo treated me with care and respect, as long as he loved me, and I loved him, things would work out.
I’d stand by him and support him as best as I could, because he was mine and I was his.EPILOGUEGiannaIt was late April and today was the first warm day of the year. The temperature had finally climbed over 70°F. The ocean was still too cold to swim in it, but I didn’t care.
I wasn’t sure what it was about the beach and the ocean breeze that made me feel free. I stormed down the vast lawn of the Vitiello mansion toward the bay. Matteo was close behind me, and catching up judging from his steps. I sped up even more, not daring to throw a glance over my shoulder to check.
My feet hit the sand. It wasn’t exactly warm; the water would be worse, but I didn’t slow. I stormed right toward the soft waves. The moment my calves hit the water my breath caught in my throat and I stumbled to a stop. This was definitely still too cold to swim. I almost fell forward because of my momentum. Teeth shattering, I was about to back out again when warm hands gripped my waist and lifted me up.
“No! Don’t you dare!” I screamed.
Matteo chuckled and then I was thrown through the air and landed with a splash in the freezing water. My muscles seized for a moment, then I burst through the surface and panted for breath. I scowled at Matteo who was grinning at me. He was up to his stomach in the water and didn’t seem to mind the cold. “You bastard,” I brought out through my shattering teeth.
My entire body started shaking. I wrapped my arms around my chest to make a show out of my freezing. Matteo’s brows drew together and he came toward me, actually looking worried. The moment he was in arm-reach, I attacked. I lunged at him, grasping his shoulders and trying to dunk him under the water.
I should have considered how used Matteo was to physical fights. He used my momentum to catapult me up and swing me over his shoulder. “Hey!” I shouted in protest but he only clapped my butt and started carrying me out of the ocean. “Where are you taking me?”
“We need to warm you up,” he said wickedly.
Excitement jolted through me but I made a show out of kicking my legs and hammering my fists against his back. He carried me to the right toward a corner of the lawn that was shielded from the mansion by bushes. A blanket had been set up. He had planned this!
He lay me down on the blanket and hovered over me. My body was covered in goosebumps, and not just from the cold.
“How about I lick every drop of water off your skin?” Matteo murmured as he leaned down and licked a hot trail up from my bellybutton to my collarbone.
“What if Aria or Luca come down here?” I whispered as he pushed my bikini top down, baring my breasts to the cold. My nipples hardened even more, and then Matteo’s hot mouth closed around one. I cared less and less if someone caught us.
“They won’t,” he whispered against my skin. And that was the last time we spoke in a long time. His lips and hands found every place on my body, banishing the cold and leaving only heat and want. When he finally entered me, our bodies pressed together, it felt like everything was falling into place.
Even without the breeze and the blue sky, I would have felt free. It had taken a long time but I realized I could feel free, be free, even when I was bound to Matteo.
***
In the evening, Matteo and Luca set up a barbecue on the patio. The weather was holding up and we could eat outside. Aria went inside to grab the salad she’d prepared while Matteo headed toward the wine cellar for something to drink. That left me alone with Luca who was manning the barbecue grill. I set the table, pretending he wasn’t there. Things between Luca and me were tense; they’d never been not tense, but they’d gotten worse since I’d accepted his offer months ago.
I took a deep breath. This had to stop. Luca was not only Matteo’s brother, he was also Aria’s husband. We had to make a truce at some point. I put down the last plate, wiped my hands and then strode over to Luca who was turning the marinated lamb chops around on the grate. As if he could sense my attention, he glanced up. It was futile trying to read his expression. I bridged the remaining distance between us. Most of our interactions hadn’t exactly been civil. My go-to-response to him was usually snarkiness, but I was doing my best to keep my expression open and as friendly as possible.