Then I spit, washed my face and the toothbrush, and tossed it against the counter.
It slid off and fell to the floor.
I rolled my eyes, bent down, and picked it up.
When I straightened up, I once again caught sight of myself in the mirror.
I closed my eyes and counted to ten, all the while trying hard to remember just a single, small fact.
But nothing came.
Not a single thing.
Not a one.
Which pissed me off all over again.
Fuck everything about this life.
Fuck it all.Chapter 54 out of 3 people struggle with math.
-T-shirt
Frankie
I should’ve turned around.
Instead, I went ahead and entered through the front door, hoping that they wouldn’t see me.
But, I should’ve guessed that they would.
There was an entire table full of alpha males. There was no way in hell that I would’ve gone unnoticed with all of them facing my way.
Jonah was the first one to spot me.
Mala…Riel, the second.
His eyes snapped up and completely focused on me.
“What would you like to order, ma’am?” the woman behind the podium asked.
I opened my mouth to tell her what I wanted when I found a massive, warm body quite close to me.
I reflexively took a step back and swallowed hard.
Like always, it was a punch to the gut to see Riel.
And not because he was scarred.
Because every time I looked at him, I was reminded of what I no longer had.
And it hurt.
God, did it hurt.
I smiled through the pain.
“Riel,” I whispered softly. “How are you?”
Riel sounded so fucking wrong.
But, I couldn’t fault him for not wanting to be called Malachi when he didn’t remember who Malachi was.
“Hey,” Riel rumbled, his deep, raspy voice that sounded so familiar yet not, sent shivers down my spine.
“H-hey,” I stuttered.
God, his voice.
What was it about it?
His vocal cords had likely been damaged in whatever accident that had scarred him so badly. But still, there was something so familiar about it that it mentally hurt to listen to.
“You want to come eat with us?” he asked, sounding genuine.
I wasn’t interested in eating with them, though.
I wanted to go home, wallow in my own grief.
Today had started out so promising.
I’d woken up, and for once, I hadn’t had nightmares about Luca.
I’d had nightmares about Malachi.
But that was progress, right?
I’d headed to work after that, but then I’d gotten to feeling guilty that my dreams had been about Malachi and not Luca.
And then I moved on to how I couldn’t remember how Luca smelled.
How my favorite t-shirt that used to be his had been accidentally bleached by my housekeeper the week prior.
Then the day from hell had started, beginning and ending with Dr. Cromwell berating both me and a fellow med student—Hunter Crayton.
It’d been over something utterly stupid—helping a nurse when she’d asked for help.
Apparently, we were not their slaves.
Or whatever the fuck he said.
I’d started tuning him out the moment he said that the nurses could handle the shit on their own.
Then I began mentally chanting that I only had one more year left and had nearly missed him say that he wanted me back at work tomorrow bright and early to help cover another med student’s shift so that he could attend a funeral for his ex-girlfriend’s sister.
Which led to now. Me ordering food at nearly nine o’clock at night, only to have to return to work tomorrow morning at six-thirty.
I looked at the table that had seven men total, and five women.
“Umm, you don’t have enough room at your table,” I stalled. “And I’m just getting a to-go order. I had a really long day.”
“That table pulls out farther,” the hostess piped in. “There’s a leaf that’s on the end next to the sexy older man. We can pull a chair from the other table for you. Make it work.”
Riel’s lips tipped up slightly.
It would’ve been a full-blown grin had the muscles in his face not been affected by the scars.
I was fairly sure that even if he’d wanted to, he couldn’t smile like he once could.
“We’re not staying long,” he promised. “Just a quick dinner. Monthly thing that we do with the team for ‘team building’ or some bullshit like that. Captain Morgan makes us do it.”
I snickered—nearly—at the Captain Morgan comment.
But I really was piss poor company today.
And in a bad mood to boot.
“I’m just… not in a good mood,” I admitted. “I’d be an asshole to eat with.”
Riel blinked at me as if he didn’t believe me.
“Come on,” he said. “I don’t really want to be here, either.”
He muttered that so quietly that I began to feel bad for him as well.
“How about you use me as an excuse and leave?” I suggested. “Then we can both go home.”
“He can’t leave.”
I looked over Riel’s shoulder to see Captain Morgan staring at me as if I was a bad influence.
“Okay,” I shrugged.
Riel’s eyes narrowed.
“Come on,” Captain Morgan ordered, gesturing to me. “You can come keep ol’ whiner over here company.”