Herd That (The Valentine Boys 1)

“No,” I managed to croak. “There’s no reason to. I’ve never seen anyone leave a tip before.”

He nodded once and shoved the wallet back into his pocket, making the waistband go even lower.

I licked my lips, unable to stop myself.

Dear God.

Dear sweet baby Jesus.

What was this man doing to me?

I was fairly certain now that he wasn’t wearing underwear. Pants didn’t ride that low and not reveal an underwear waistband if one was wearing them.

That was when I reached forward to take a sip of my tea and spilled Desi’s glass of water all over me instead.

I stared in horror as it soaked through my entire outfit in point two seconds flat.

My very light pink sweatpants and my borrowed shirt.

“Shit,” I muttered, wondering what I should do.

That was when Ace practically ripped half the napkins from the dispenser in one pull and started to shove them into my lap.

I squeaked and tried to pull away, but the wall prevented my retreat from his ministrations.

“Crap,” I whispered softly.

Ace’s eyes lifted to meet mine.

“It happens,” he said.

I could feel the water leaking into my shoes now, and I just wanted to crawl into a hole and bury myself alive.

“You should ride back with them,” Desi suggested as she too stood. “Y’all live right next door to each other.”

I narrowed my eyes. “But I thought you were going to help me decorate my tree,” I said.

“I can,” she agreed. “But I have to go to the store to get some ribbon, which means that I’ll be late. Plus, you’ve spilled water on yourself, again. No offense, but you need to go home before anything else happens to you. Or you die.”

I rolled my eyes. “It was just one accident, well two.”

Which was usually where it all started.

With me, it would begin with something completely innocuous.

Then it’d turn into something big. I was an accident-prone klutz that always managed to fuck up.

For instance, two weeks ago, while I’d been in the supermarket, I’d grabbed a bottle of spray that’d had the label torn off of it at some point. When the self-checkout attendant had called for over five minutes for a bar code with no results, I’d offered to go get the code myself.

During the eight minutes I was gone—it was across the damn store from where I was checking out—I arrived to find the station I was using occupied by an older lady.

Every single grocery item that she was putting into her cart was some weird organic shit that I never would’ve bought.

When the attendant had asked me what was wrong, and I explained that my things were gone, she’d informed me that all my items had been returned to the shelves because they’d thought I’d left and wasn’t coming back.

I hadn’t.

And instead of going all the way through the store again, I’d gone home pissed off and annoyed. When I’d arrived at home, it was to find out that my granddad had eaten every single piece of meat in the fridge for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Meaning I had absolutely nothing to eat.

The only thing that was left in the house at all at that point was pasta with no sauce to put on it, canned green beans that had been in the same spot so long that there was a thick layer of dust on it, and canned pie filling.

Which happened to be why I was outside, eating my grandmother’s homemade cherry pie filling straight from the jar, when the damn thing had busted in my hands due to my bright idea to warm it up.

I’d looked like fucking Carrie.

“Ready to go?” Ace asked.

“If you don’t mind, I’ll go to the store with you,” Callum said as he looked at Desi. “I need to grab shit for dinner.”

Desi grinned. “As long as you allow me to eat said dinner.”

Ace gagged. “You don’t want to. It’s all protein powder and salads and smoothies.”

Desi tilted her head sideways slightly. “I need to eat healthier… maybe I should learn how to make protein shakes… is there one you recommend for beginners? Ones that won’t make hair grow on my chin and cause my voice to deepen?”

Callum’s husky laughter followed them out the door.

“Ready?” Ace asked.

I nodded my head as I started for the door.

Ace paused when Mal stood up and stopped his progress.

“I wanted to invite you to the wedding,” he declared loudly.

I looked around the restaurant and bit my lip, swallowing hard and wondering if there was about to be a scene.

“I hope you’ll understand why I won’t accept that invitation,” he said softly. “But I wish you two the best.”

Mal blinked, then turned to Marjorie who looked heartbroken. Not because she wanted Ace to be there, but likely because he was standing there not giving a shit about anything she said or did.