The Boy Who Has No Hope (Soulless 6)

The music was loud, there were people everywhere, and the waitress had dropped my first drink when she handed it to me, so she had to get me another. My eyes followed her as she moved through the crowd of people with my scotch in hand. “Work.”

“That’s it?” Mike asked. “Just work?”

“Yes, it’s not very exciting.” I watched the waitress halt to talk to someone in the crowd.

Fuck, what did I have to do to get my fucking drink?

Mike laughed. “Working on rockets to send to space is pretty exciting to me. But a billionaire not having fun, that’s not exciting.” He looked past me in the crowd like he was searching for someone. “Oh good, Amanda is here.”

I kept watching my waitress. She ended her conversation and headed my way. Finally.

“Did I tell you about Amanda?” Mike asked. “I met her last weekend. Hot as fire. She brought a friend along, and I want to introduce you.”

The waitress reached me and handed over the scotch. “Thanks.” I was about to take a drink when Mike grabbed my arm.

“Take a look.” He pivoted me around, seeing two brunettes coming our way in short dresses. Amanda was closer to our age, but the friend she brought for me looked like she wasn’t much older than the drinking age. She was exactly my type—but I felt nothing. “Look at those fucking legs.”

Her eyes were on me like she knew exactly who I was and had been looking forward to this meeting since she found out Amanda knew me, distantly. She flipped her hair over her shoulder, looked down for a second like she was shy, but then lifted her gaze and licked her lips, showing she wasn’t shy at all.

When they reached us, Amanda embraced Mike with a kiss that made me look away.

The woman walked up to me and took the drink out of my hand. Without even introducing herself, she took a sip of my scotch, got lipstick all over the rim, and sucked a big ice cube into her mouth so she could stick out her tongue and show me. Then she handed the drink back.

Mike came up for air in time to see it. “Derek, this is Corinne.”

She spoke with the ice cube muffling her speech. “Nice to meet you, Derek.” She leaned into me, ready to kiss me and put the ice cube in my mouth.

My hand automatically moved to her arm, and I kept her back so she wouldn’t stick that ice cube anywhere near me. Maybe I was just in a bad mood or I was annoyed that my drink had been slobbered on by a stranger, but I wasn’t into this at all. “I’m sick of this shit.” I put the drink in her hand and walked away.

Mike came after me. “What the fuck was that?”

“I’m not into her.”

“Why?” he snapped. “She’s twenty-three, sexy—”

I turned around and faced him, the obnoxious music blaring and forcing us to yell just to hear one another. “I’m too old for this bullshit. It’s not my thing anymore. Have fun with Amanda. I’m going home.”

Mike was so stunned that all he could do was stare at me.

“Bye.” I left the club and didn’t look back.When I made it home, it was a little past ten.

It was too late to start on my projects, but it was too early to go to sleep. My head still pounded from the bass of that club. The second I’d gotten outside, I’d breathed the fresh air and finally felt the tightness in my stomach loosen. The moment I’d walked in, it didn’t feel right. All I wanted to do was leave as soon as I got there.

My penthouse was quiet, and I opted for a beer instead of the scotch I never got to drink. I sat at the dining table and opened my laptop, thinking about the shit that needed my attention. But instead of working on that, I dived back into my story.

Without even the whiteboard or the character arc notes, I jumped into that world and immediately got lost in it. It was like returning to your childhood home, where it was exactly as you remembered it, and you could fall back into your old ways within a few hours.

The last woman I’d been with consistently was Fleur, and that went to shit months ago. Instead of being eager for sex, I was content with nothing. There was no need to chase down pussy because it didn’t sound the least bit appetizing. I hardly jerked off either, as if the necessity had faded. I was a young man in my prime months ago, but now I was like an old man who just wanted to be alone.

My phone lit up with a text message.

Are you writing right now??? It was Emerson.