"Look at me," he demanded and my head shifted on the pillow to find his face.
It happened simultaneously.
His lips crashed down on mine.
And his hand pressed between my legs.
I cried out against his lips, the sound muffled by his mouth, as my hips shifted slightly toward him. There was no teasing. No hinting at touching the sweet spot but not actually doing it. His fingers landed on my clit and immediately started working it in hard, slow circles.
"How about now?" he asked, lifting his head slightly, eyelids heavy.
But words weren't exactly something I was capable of at that moment.
"No?" he asked, smile wicked. I lost his fingers for a second before they slid up and then under my panties, stroking up my wet slit and finding my clit again. "Let's try this then."
He worked me for a long minute, eyes watching me intensely, as he drove me upward. And then his lips pressed down on mine again.
Again, it was simultaneous.
His tongue thrust into my mouth.
And his fingers thrust inside me.
I jolted, turning onto my side, my leg hooking over his hips as his fingers curled inside me, raking over the top wall and making gentle, perfect, relentless strokes over my G-spot as he kissed me hard, hard enough to bruise.
Hard and soft at the same time and it was an overwhelming sensation as he forced me to feel them simultaneously until I felt like I was teetering on the edge of something that threatened a pleasure that bordered on pain.
And I felt myself instinctively recoil from it, to pull away, to avoid the things that might be impossible to protect myself from.
"Shh," Renny whispered as his lips left mine. His breath was warm on my face and my eyes fluttered open. "Just let it happen, sweetheart. I got you."
Somehow, in that moment, I found myself putting my faith to rest in that. I found myself trusting him.
So when he pushed me back to the edge again, I didn't try to plant my feet, to fight it, to pull away.
The orgasm tore through me- a deep, hard throbbing that made my entire body shudder once as Renny pressed his forehead to mine and I cried out loudly, fingers digging into his arm and back hard enough that there were sure to be marks after.
As the shocks subsided, his free arm slid under me and curled up, grabbing me at the base of my skull, and pressing my head into his chest as his fingers continued a slow, lazy thrusting, bringing me back down.
But even when the orgasm was done, his fingers stayed inside me, a kind of intimacy I would have recoiled from normally.
Sex was sex.
Intimacy was a different animal entirely.
And I had never been comfortable with it before.
But somehow, in that room, in that bed, in the arms of a man I knew was as unpredictable as the weather, it not only felt comfortable. It somehow felt right.
Right in that moment, I couldn't seem to stop myself from blurting out what had been on my mind, and the subsequent insecurity that went along with it.
"Do I blow hot and cold?"
"What?" he asked, slowly pulling back slightly, eyes landing on mine.
"Cyrus said we're weird together because we both blow so hot and cold."
"Cyrus is an idiot."
"Cyrus is an objective third party," I countered.
"Alright, fine. He's not an idiot," he conceded.
"You didn't answer my question."
He sighed a little. "Fine. You pretend to be cold. I think the longer you're stuck around the same group of people, the harder it is for you to keep up that pretense. So you warm up. And that makes you seem hot and cold. Happy?"
It wasn't exactly the kind of news that made you happy. As much as I had absolutely worked to become cooler, more detached, guarded, it hurt in a strange way to be called on that. It shouldn't have. Logically, it should have made me happy. Maybe if I wasn't post-orgasm contented and Renny's fingers weren't still inside me, I could have found the determination to be that woman I had worked to be my whole life.
"No," I admitted, looking into his eyes and seeing understanding there.
"You like pretending to be cool, Mina," he said, his fingers sliding out of me then out of my panties to settle on the material covering my ass. "But I see underneath the ice. It's not as thick as you want it to seem. Just a small puddle really. Bet you I can melt it without much effort."
I had a sneaking suspicion that he would win that bet. I had just been in a bed with him for a couple hours and I was pretty sure I was already thawing.
"That scare you?" he asked, his hand behind my neck moving down to whisper across my shoulders.
I took a breath and gave him the truth. "It would scare me less if I knew you well enough to trust you."