“It doesn’t mean nothing and you know that. It means everything. You can’t think for a second that as you marry today, that’s it, your life is over. It hasn’t even come close to beginning.”
She snorted and Henrietta tutted.
“No lady should make those kinds of sounds.”
“Damon is the best choice. He doesn’t want a wife he can hurt and push aside. Your father picked wisely, and all of your training won’t be for nothing. He will make sure of it. I promise.”
“I can’t help but feel this is all a nightmare waiting to happen.”
Henrietta laughed. “Sweetheart, most women think this on their wedding day. It’s not new.”
“You know, we’re trying to encourage her to get down the aisle. Damon’s doing this to protect you. This is also your father’s wishes. If you can’t do it for yourself, then at the very least, do it for him.”
“Is it hard for you to see your father down there?” she asked, changing the topic.
“Don’t do that and no, that man has no say in my life. He tossed me aside as if I meant nothing to him. The only real father I ever knew was yours, which is why I know he has done everything in his power to help you. If he wants Damon to take care of you, let him. It’s what your father wanted and he always had a good reason for it.”
She couldn’t argue with her father. He always had his reasons for doing everything, even if she didn’t always agree.
Glancing at her reflection, this was the last time she’d be a single, independent woman.
Independent? That’s a laugh. You’ve never been any of this all of your life.
Her father had made her believe she would be different. Her life had never been her own. This was all an illusion. She was never going to be free. Her father had done nothing but feed her a lie.
“Hey,” Randy said. He placed a finger beneath her chin, lifting it so she’d look at him. “Don’t be afraid or sad. Damon is a good guy.”
“Please, don’t feed me those lies. He’s earned his reputation. I’m not a fool and you can’t treat me like one.”
“Yes, he has all of those names and the way people deal with him, but he has been nothing but respectful to you.” Randy pulled her in for a hug. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be by your side ’til the very end.”
“You need to find a wife and have lots of kids.”
“I’m not bringing a woman into my world, and there’s no way I’d let any sons or daughters be at the mercy of this life.”
She pulled away, wiping at her eyes. “See, and now I’ve got to marry a man.”
“Your parents didn’t want this for you. They didn’t want any of this for you. I promise. Life happens and it’s complete and total shit.” He kissed her forehead. “You’re stronger than this. You can overcome all of this, and you don’t need any fucker to tell you differently. Damon will be getting a queen at his side, no one else.”
“You think I’m a queen?”
“I know you are. Now are you a fighter or are you going to run?”
She looked toward the door. She wanted to run. To get as far away from everything as she possibly could. Instead, she squared her shoulders, prepared for battle. This was her wedding day and even though she didn’t want to be married or be at the mercy of anyone, she had no choice. Damon was right, as was Randy. They were going to kill her for what her father owned. She would spite them all and be a force to be reckoned with.
Taking Randy’s arm, she made her way toward the aisle. Sickness swirled in her stomach as she got to the entrance. There were so many people. None of them were friends. Randy held his chin high.
Several of the capos had offered to walk her down the aisle. She’d defied them all by picking Randy. The bastard son. The only father figure she had left.
The music started. Damon stood waiting.
With every single step she took, her heart raced.
Fear crawled down her back. She wanted to turn, to run, to find her freedom. To finally live a life free of all of this. Instead, she kept on walking.
This was what her father wanted and it was his last wish. She wouldn’t defy him. She’d make him proud. Her mother had gone through this. Her parents had found love. She didn’t for a second believe she would ever love Damon, but she could respect him and like him.
When Randy passed her hand over to Damon’s, she stood by his side, waiting. She didn’t cower or cry. Her back ramrod straight. Proud.
The priest began to speak. She ignored it.
Damon’s touch was gentle and she even felt him stroke her fingers as if to offer her some semblance of comfort.