‘We’re supposed to look as though we’re in love.’ Apparently unaffected by her mounting distress, he strode over to an antique table next to the window. ‘Do you want a drink?’
‘No. I don’t want a drink!’ Her heart was suddenly bumping hard and she felt physically sick. ‘Are you saying that everything that happened today was for the benefit of the crowd?’
He poured himself a whisky but didn’t touch it. Instead he stared out of the window, his knuckles white on the glass, his handsome face revealing nothing of his thoughts. No emotion. ‘They wanted the fairy tale. We gave it to them. That’s what we royals have to do. We give the people what they want. In this case, a love match, a wedding and an heir.’
She blinked rapidly, determined to hold back the tears. ‘So why did you marry me?’
He lifted the glass to his lips. ‘Why not?’
‘Because you could have married someone you loved.’
He lowered the glass without drinking. ‘I don’t want love.’
Because he’d had it once and now it was gone?
Holly’s throat closed. ‘That’s a terrible thing to say and a terrible way to feel,’ she whispered. ‘I know you lost and I know you must have suffered, but—’
‘You don’t know anything.’
‘Then tell me!’ She was crying openly now, tears flooding her cheeks. ‘I’m devastated that the whole of today was a sham. I know it’s difficult for you to talk about Antonia, and frankly it isn’t that easy to hear it, either. But I know we’re not going to have any sort of marriage unless we’re honest with each other.’
Please don’t let him walk out on me. Please don’t let that happen.
‘Honest?’ He slammed the glass down onto the table and turned to look at her. ‘You lie about your baby, you lie all the way to the altar wearing your symbolic white dress, and then you suggest we’re honest? It’s a little late for that, don’t you think?’
‘It’s your baby,’ Holly said hoarsely. Her insides were twisted in pain as she felt her new life crumbling around her. ‘And I don’t know how you can believe otherwise.’
‘Don’t you? Then let me tell you.’ He strolled towards her, his eyes glittering dark and deadly. ‘It can’t be my baby, Holly, because I can’t have children. I don’t know whose baby you’re carrying, my sweet wife, but I know for sure it isn’t mine. I’m infertile.’
CHAPTER SIX
‘NO.’ HOLLY sat down hard on the nearest chair, her heart pounding. ‘That isn’t possible,’ she said hoarsely. ‘I am living proof that it isn’t possible. Why would you even think that?’
‘Eight years ago I had an accident.’
The accident that had killed his brother and Antonia. ‘I know about the accident.’
‘You know only what I chose to reveal.’ He paced across the room and stared out over the ocean. ‘Everyone knew that Santallia lost the heir to the throne. Everyone knew my fiancée died. No one knew that the accident crushed my pelvis so badly that my chances of ever fathering a child were nil.’
Holly’s mind was in turmoil. ‘Casper—’
‘We had a crisis on our hands.’ He thrust his hands into his pockets, the movement emphasising the hard masculine lines of his body. ‘My brother was dead. I was suddenly the ruling prince and I was in intensive care, hitched up to a ventilator. When I recovered, everyone was celebrating. It was the wrong time to break the news to the people that their prince couldn’t give them what they wanted.’
Holly sank her hands into her hair, struggling to take in what he was saying. ‘Who told you?’
‘The doctor who treated me.’
‘Well, the doctor was wrong.’ Her hands fell to her sides and she walked across to him, her tone urgent. ‘Look at me, Casper. Listen to me. Whatever you may have been told—whatever you think—you are not infertile. I am having your baby.’
‘Don’t do this, Holly.’ He drew away from her. ‘I’ve accepted your child as mine, and that’s all that matters. You’ve given me my heir. The public think you’re a genius.’ He stared into his drink. ‘At some point, I’ll have to tell the people the truth. Let them decide about the succession.’
As the implications of his words sank in, Holly shook her head, horrified by what that would mean. ‘No. You mustn’t do that.’
‘Because your newfound popularity would take a nosedive?’ He gave a cynical smile. ‘You think Santallia might rather not know that its new innocent princess has rather more sexual experience than they’d like?’
‘Casper, my sexual experience encompasses you and only you.’ Frustrated that she couldn’t get through to him, Holly turned away and walked over to the window. Dawn was breaking and the rising sun sent pink shadows over the sea, but she saw nothing except her child’s future crumbling before her. ‘You should see a doctor again. You should have more tests. They made a mistake.’
‘The subject is closed.’
‘Fine. Don’t have tests, then.’ Anger and frustration rose out of her misery. ‘But don’t you dare announce to the world that this isn’t your baby!’ Her eyes suddenly fierce, she turned on him. ‘I do not want our child having that sort of scar on his background. And once you’ve said something like that, you can never take it back.’
‘They have a right to know about the baby’s paternity.’
Holly straightened her shoulders. ‘Once the baby is born, I’ll prove our baby’s paternity. Until then, you say nothing.’
‘If you’re so confident about paternity, then why wait? There are tests that can be done now. Or are you buying yourself more time?’
She lifted her hands to her cheeks, so stressed that she could hardly breathe. ‘Tests now would put the baby at risk and I won’t do that. But don’t you dare tell anyone this isn’t your baby. Promise me, Casper.’
‘All right.’
Celebrating that minor victory, Holly sank onto the curved window seat and stared down at the sea lapping at the white sand below. ‘Why didn’t you tell me this when we were in London?’
‘Because you didn’t need to know.’
‘How can you say that?’
‘You wanted a father for your baby and I needed an heir. The details were irrelevant and they still are. You have a prince, a palace and a fortune. This drama is unnecessary.’
‘I wanted our baby to know its father,’ Holly whispered softly, her hand covering her abdomen in an instinctive gesture of protection. ‘I thought marrying you was the right thing to do.’
‘If it’s any consolation, I wouldn’t have let you make any other decision. And I don’t want to talk about this again, Holly. You’ll have everything you need and so will the baby.’
No. No, she wouldn’t.
Holly closed her eyes, trying to ignore the raw wound caused by his admission that the whole day had been a lie.
She’d felt lonely before, but nothing had come close to the feeling of isolation that engulfed her following Casper’s rejection.
She desperately wanted to talk to someone—to confide.