He sniffed it as usual and raised a brow. "Mom worked in bars?"
"It was how she put herself through college." I dipped my chin and went for the laptop. "I did it briefly when I first moved out here, but she was a natural."
He sipped it slowly then nodded to himself, approving. "Don't you get hungry?"
Oh, right. Food.
Cooking used to be a passion. That had disappeared, too.
"Top drawer next to the fridge," I said as I went to Best Buy's website. "It's where I keep all the takeout menus. Order whatever you want and get me something vegetarian. I'm not picky."
Julian had done a good job of ordering furniture, kitchenware, bathroom stuff, and even some decorative crap like pillows, blankets, and drapes. I was useless in that department, but I knew gadgets.
"You're a vegetarian?" Julian scrunched his nose, and he sounded adorably British there. The faint accent he'd picked up among international scholars in Germany shone through here and there.
I chuckled. "A fake one. I eat seafood and poultry on occasion." I side-eyed him, wondering what world he lived in. "You didn't know? I was the butt of every dinner-related joke at reunions. My pop thought it was hilarious." Not to mention ridiculous, but it was all in good fun.
It was a health choice. I used to be somewhat of a fitness freak, and avoiding steaks and burgers tended to lead to healthier meals. Unfortunately, alcohol was vegetarian.
It bothered me, my new drinking habit, but I wasn't ready to give it up. Then again, when was anyone ever?
Julian ended up ordering us pizza while I shopped for tech. He would need a flat screen in his room, I wanted a desktop computer in my study, a couple gaming consoles would be cool, a Blu-Ray player, upgrading my surround sound system…
"Damn, you're buying a lot." He shifted a bit closer, intrigued. "It's strange having money. I bought a guitar last week and felt bad."
"Why?" I frowned at him.
He shrugged with one shoulder. "I didn't work for it."
Understandable. "Did you have a job back home?"
"Part time, since I was in school. I worked at a movie theater, and sometimes I ran errands for Dad."
I smiled to myself. Jobs like that took me back to when life was both harder and easier. When you worked for your next meal and the ability to pay for gas and electric. I could borrow from my folks if it got really bad, but they'd always encouraged both me and Mia to pursue our dreams on our own. Those were simple times.
A care package from Ma with cookies, a new shirt, and aftershave meant the world. Sometimes she'd sent us quarters, which had been a hint to get our asses to the nearest payphone and call home more often. Sometimes there were printouts of simple recipes.
The cookies were my favorite, though.
I swallowed down the stab of pain and the emotions rising and tried to focus on…gadgets. Which, fuck, felt empty and worthless now. Memories were cunty. They could change my mood in a second.
*
I didn't touch my pizza, and Julian could undoubtedly sense that I was done talking for the evening. I poured a cup of vodka and sipped it while staring at the TV. No idea what movie he'd picked, but I didn't care anyway.
It was a good thing I'd told him I probably wouldn't be the best company if he came out here.
Around three in the morning, I was ready to pass out. Julian was still awake, but he looked tired.
"We should get some sleep." I grunted as I rose from the bed, and a wave of dizziness took over.
"Right." He sat up. "Do you mind if we move the bed into your room first?"
"Why?" I could barely stand up. Heavy lifting could get me injured.
"Because when the furniture gets delivered tomorrow, I can get started without waking you up."
That…that was a solid idea. I didn't think I'd sleep that long, but if he could handle the delivery without me, that'd be awesome. I didn't have a single polite smile left in me, so I wanted to avoid people.
"Yeah, okay." I rubbed my eyes and tried to clear my head. "Which room is mine?"
"I picked the middle one across the hall, but I can change."
I shook my head. The middle used to be mine, so it was a relief he'd gone with that.
*
I woke up the next morning to my phone going off. The sun was fucking brutal, and memories came flooding back from yesterday. Julian was here. We'd moved the bed into my new bedroom, which meant I got the morning sun.
My mouth tasted like death, and I groaned as I rolled over to reach my phone. I blinked blearily at the screen as a headache settled in.
Four missed calls from Sophie.
"Jesus," I whispered hoarsely.