Deserted - Auctioned

Darius inclined his head, unaffected as ever. “That’s what I was getting at. I wanted to get Jackie out too, but we’re done now. We’re done. You’ve promised Jayden to be there for him, and we’re gonna take care of Justin too. That’s a huge responsibility, and we can’t do this again. We can’t fuck off for several days to rescue someone.”

Gray swallowed uneasily and clenched his jaw. “I know that.”

“It includes vengeance, knucklehead.”

“What—”

“We leave the case to the authorities now,” Darius stated. “We’re not gonna chase after anyone. We walk away.”

Those words deflated Gray, and he exhaled. He understood Darius better now. Because no one knew Gray as well as Darius, who was fully aware of how badly Gray wanted the higher-ups in the criminal organization to suffer. To die. To get wiped from the surface of the earth so they couldn’t do this to more innocent people.

“I get it,” Gray responded quietly. “We don’t get involved. The heads of the trafficking ring will get away, because you said the Feds will never be able to pin anything on them, but it’s not our place to play judge, jury, and executioner. We walk away, they walk free. I get it.”

“Yeah, I can hear that,” Darius sighed. “I’m gonna need your word on this one, Gray. You have to promise me.”

Gray scowled at him. “What the fuck am I supposed to do? Call all my friends with decades of experience in intelligence and extractions behind your back and…oh, wait. I don’t have those.” He rolled his eyes and turned his scowl out the window. “I’m gonna be there for the boys. I fucking love them.” It hit him that he was offended Darius would imply Gray was taking his promise to Jayden lightly, and it started a new fire. “You know, I’ve always wanted a family of my own. You can call me a kid all you want, but I was fucking born responsible. Not all young people are reckless and undependable.”

“Have I said that?” Darius frowned. “If I didn’t believe you’d make a great dad, I wouldn’t have agreed to this, ’cause God knows I won’t be wonderful at it. I’mma need a shit-ton of help. But,” he stressed, “I also believe you have a heart that’s gonna bleed you dry if you don’t enforce limits on who you’re gonna help. You can’t be there for everyone. You can’t save everyone. Because you will never be satisfied. You’ll never reach a point where you feel like you’ve done enough.”

They weren’t talking about Gray anymore, and it took the fight out of him.

This was what Darius had done for years and years. He’d been chasing something. He’d wanted to restore the world in some way; he’d wanted the good guys to win. When, in reality, both sides would always exist.

Darius had hunted innocence like drug addicts went after their next fix.

Gray blew out a breath and grabbed Darius’s hand. “First of all, you’re gonna be a terrific father. I mean, you focus on logistics and everything.” He’d hoped that would’ve made Darius smile, but there was just a small twitch. “Baby, you’re gonna be amazing.” He squeezed his hand. “You’re practical, protective, nurturing, and supportive. And…you understand me. You can predict my reactions better than I can—which is only mildly annoying—but it means you can check me when I need it. Because you’re right. After everything I went through this past winter, I’m desperate to see good in the world.” Actually… “Actually, I’m desperate to defeat the evil, which won’t work. There will always be a new target—one that would take me away from home. From you, from the boys.”

Darius threaded their fingers together and held on tightly, while keeping his eyes on the road. It was hard to see because it was dark, but Gray was fairly sure he saw Darius’s eyes get a bit glassy.

Darius cleared his throat. “I’m terrified to wake up one morning and see you gone because you wanna chase down the heads of this organization.”

“It won’t happen,” Gray vowed quickly. “Not even if I had your skills, all the favors you could cash in, or all the friends who could help. I promise you, Darius. I’m done. Jackie’s free. Now I’m going to focus on building a good future with you, Jayden, and Justin. We’ll prepare them, you know? We’ll take our experiences and teach them everything they need to know to be independent one day. You can teach us all to be zombie preppers.”

That worked, finally. Darius chuckled quietly and kissed Gray’s fingers. “We’re gonna scar them for life.”

Gray grinned. “I can make us tinfoil hats.”

Darius let out a laugh. “Christ, I fucking love you, knucklehead.”

Whoa.

A shiver ripped through him, the sensations making his goddamn heart soar.

“You do?” His stomach felt tight with nerves. “You didn’t just say that in the—”