Forever Her Cowboy (Always 1)

“I should try making baby food again. It might not have worked out the last time when I was pregnant with Josh, but I’m sure I can do it this time.” It’s quiet in the room for a second before we both burst into laughter. Each of us knows that her cooking skills have not improved one bit.

“Fine, I’ll hold off on the cooking for now. There’s just one last thing I want to tell you, Noelle.” Her hand comes up to cup my cheek. “You are going to make one heck of a mom. Don’t ever think anything less.” Her words soothe something deep inside of me that I hadn’t even realized I was concerned about.9Josh“Here, babe.” I take the cooking books from Noelle’s hands as we make the short walk toward her building. It makes me feel better that everything is right here for her. It’s going to fucking suck being away from her during the week, but we’ll figure it out. I’ve waited this long for her. I can do it a little bit longer. At least now I can have her some of the time.

“What did you think?”

“It’s really nice. I still think it’s going to be hard for anyone to try to teach you. I swear you already know everything when it comes to cooking.”

Her cheeks tint pink and she gives me a shy smile. “There are always new things to learn. I have to do something.” She shrugs her delicate shoulder.

“You want to do this, right?” I don’t want her doing anything if she’s not into it. I know her parents didn't push her into this. If it was up to her mom, the only thing Noelle would do are pageants. I think her mom's dream was for some USA title or whatever that is. I’m thankful she’s not into that. I’d have to fight some baser needs with her strolling across a stage in heels and wearing a swimsuit. I’ve already wanted to punch two guys since we left the house that were checking her out.

“Yes, I want to do this, but I’d be lying if I didn't admit that more than anything I wanted out of my parents’ house.”

That shit always pisses me off. I wrap my arm around her, pulling her into my side. “You do whatever you want, and I promise I’ll be okay with it and we’ll figure it out.”

She gives me a sweet smile. “The program is not that long, so I’ll see after that.”

“What were you planning for after the program if you don’t mind me asking.”

She tenses in my arms a little. Shit. “Getting a job somewhere. A bakery. There are a lot of places here.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?” She lifts her eyebrows at me.

“Yeah, I’m not going to stop you from living your dreams.” Her pink tongue comes out, swiping her bottom lip. It will be tough, but we’ll figure it out.

“What do you want Josh? What are your plans?”

“I think everyone knows my plans. I’m supposed to fill my father's shoes.”

“And you want that? You don’t feel pressured to do it?” She shakes her head, sending her blonde ponytail bouncing. “Stupid question. Bunny and Jameson wouldn’t care what you decided to do as long as you were happy.”

“No. I think it’s in my blood. Growing up seeing my father. Then watching him take care of his family and be so in love with Mom. What more could you really want in life?”

“That does sound wonderful.”

“You’re more than welcome to join me, or we can stay here in the city.”

She stops walking to turn and look at me in the middle of the sidewalk. “You’d do that? You have a life back home. A job and a house.”

“Which means nothing without you.”

Her eyes start to water. I grab her hand, pulling her off to the side and out of the way of everyone. Over the past week that I’ve been staying here Noelle has been a little emotional. Her tears kill me. I’m hoping it’s stemming from all of the changes that are happening to her so quickly. I know it’s overwhelming, but it will pass.

“You’re so sweet. You know that?” She rests her head on my chest while I rub my hands up and down her back. “I want that too. I want to do my program and then go back home. I think everyone knows how much I love being out there.” I kiss the top of her head. “I just don’t know what I’ll do. I know nothing about farming. It’s not like I can get a job somewhere close.”

“I think that’s the least of our worries, babe. We’ll deal with all that shit later.” I’m not going to tell her that in my eyes her being at home each day when I come in from work would be a dream, but I don’t think you’re supposed to tell your girl that you want her to be a stay-at-home mom. I think that’s something they have to come to terms with on their own. I won’t force anything on her. Her parents did enough of that shit.