That Hot Night

“Oh please,” Bo scoffed. “What does that even mean? He’s been spending all of his free time with you for months even though you both thought you could keep a secret in this town.”

“That’s different, it’s sex. I didn’t say there was no chemistry.”

“You also didn’t say that you don’t love him,” Reese added, totally not helping. At all. “And that’s because you totally do.”

“Fine,” I sighed. “I do, okay? But that doesn’t change anything. I’m not setting myself up for something I know will end horribly. And in case you’ve forgotten, Rafe doesn’t feel that way about me.”

“Did he say that?” Stevie’s question surprised me and so did the knowing smirk she wore.

“No, he didn’t. But he also didn’t say he did when I told him we were all wrong for each other. So that’s that girls, all right?”

“No dammit, not all right. You want Rafe, right?” Reese had a gleam in her eyes that I didn’t trust.

“It doesn’t matter. It’s too late.”

Reese flashed a wide grin and wrapped an arm around my shoulders. “It’s never too late,” she said ominously. “Especially when it’s a grand gesture.”

I’d seen grand gestures in movies, guys running through crowded airports or girls battling stage fright to show they weren’t scared of love, but I had no clue where to start on one of my own.

And worse, I didn’t know if a grand gesture would even be welcome.

This love mess was scary business.Rafe“You could at least look like you’re having fun.” Reese glared up at me and punctuated her words with a backhanded slap to the gut. “This is a barbecue, which you love, in your honor. Something you also love.” The playful smile she flashed took the sting off her words. A bit.

She was right, the Hero’s BBQ was the last official, and hopefully unofficial, event for the Hometown Heroes. Sponsored by the matchmakers as a way of saying thanks for donating our time and faces to help the town, the women had managed to get Big Mama, Reese and Texican’s to donate food for the celebration. Other businesses had contributed and what had started as a backyard gathering now took up all of Main Street. Everyone had worked hard to donate time and food to the event so I looked at my best friend and slapped on a phony grin that was wider than Texas. “Better?”

“If by better you mean scary as hell, sure.” She shrugged and rolled her eyes. “It’s okay to admit you’re nervous, Rafe.”

I frowned. “Who the hell said I was nervous?” I wasn’t nervous. I was pissed off, maybe a little hurt, exhausted not in the mood to socialize. “Just ready for all of this to just be over.”

“Now I know something is wrong,” she joked and pressed the back of her hand to my forehead. “I’ve never known you to avoid social gatherings in your honor.”

“Yeah, yeah,” I waved a dismissive hand in the air. “I’m so arrogant that I love being the center of attention. We all got it, Reese.”

Her smile slipped and turned into a frown. “Screw you, Rafe. Just because you screwed things up with Janey doesn’t mean you get to be a jerk to me. I tried to help, hell we all did. But take some damn responsibility for your role in all of this.” Turning my last ally against me wasn’t a smart move but my mood was so dark that I didn’t give a damn.

“So we’re back to this being my fault?” I shook my head and let out a long sigh. I knew I wasn’t innocent in how things played out with Janey but it was her lack of belief, in me and in herself, that led us here. “Ow, what the hell was that for?”

“For being a jackass when I’m only trying to help. I didn’t say it was your fault, but you can’t be that mad at Janey for thinking you don’t want to commit to her or anyone. You’ve spent the last twenty years proving that. To everyone.”

“Okay fine-,” I conceded.

“And even if you want to argue that you were just doing what single men do, you never gave her any reason to think you gave a damn.” Reese turned to the large aluminum tins filled with burgers, ribs and chicken, angrily painting her famous barbecues sauce on each one. “So what are you gonna do about it?”

That was the damn question, wasn’t it? I hadn’t seen or spoken to Reese since that night at Black Thumb, and she hadn’t reached out to me either. But today I was ready for…something. I didn’t know what, but I was tired of feeling like crap. Tired of missing her. Tired of being without her. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

She smiled over her shoulder and nodded. “If you tell me, I’ll whip up a plate for your real quick.”