I turned back to the television and frowned at the idiotic drama unfolding on the screen.
Crystal Waters slapped her daughter. “You may have slept with my husband, but now that he’s dead, you won’t get his money.”
Selene held her palm against her cheek. “Blake promised that he would leave it all to me.”
Crystal Waters laughed. “Silly girl. I’m sorry that I never taught you to get your promises in ink and not in sperm.”
Selene tried to slap her mother back.
Crystal caught it. “You bitch! You think you can come against me? I was plotting, while you were sleeping in my womb. Too bad I didn’t know the trifling whore you would become. I might’ve grabbed a knife and stabbed my stomach over and over.”
Groaning, I picked up the remote control and muted it.
Damn you, Zora.
My best friend had her tv programmed to record her favorite soap opera, the Beautiful and Deceitful. Too scared that she would miss an episode, she begged me to not change the channel for the hour of recording.
My phone rang.
Sighing, I picked my phone up and answered, “Hello.”
“Girl!” My friend Karen’s voice held annoyance. “These goddamn memes about Karens are so fucking annoying.”
I grinned. “I told you to not take them personally.”
“How can I not? It’s my damn name.”
“But, they’re not talking about you.”
On the internet, popular memes targeted the stereotypical middle-aged white woman calling them Karens. According to the internet, Karen always wanted to speak to the store’s manager to complain. Karen was entitled and usually wrong in her tattling. And most of all, Karen tended to be racist and hated any minority having fun.
My friend Karen complained, “I just saw three memes as I scrolled through my timeline. And they were posted by my supposed family members.”
“Ignore them.”
“I think they’re talking about me.”
“They’re not. It’s just a popular thing right now.”
“They better not be talking about me. I know where all their asses live.”
“Really? You’re going to beat up a cousin over a meme?”
“It’s not fair to label all Karens as annoying ass white women. I’m black and ride for my people.”
“Stop taking memes personally.”
“Easy for you to say. You’re not subject to name profiling. How the hell did they pick my name anyway?”
“Mean Girls. The movie. Remember? Karen was a member of the Plastics.”
“Yeah. I remember. She was my favorite character. I loved her name.”
I shook my head.
My phone beeped on the other line. I checked the screen and sighed. “Karen, I have to talk to you later. My mom is calling.”
“Okay, but call me back. This guy asked me out and I’m scared he might have the virus. His ass was coughing on the phone. He said he has allergies. I don’t know.”
I laughed. “Girl, bye.”
“Talk to you later.”
I switched over. “Hey, Mom. How are you?”
“Finally, you answer,” my mother said. “We’ve been worried about you.”
“I know. I just wanted to call you back when I had some actual news.”
“California is going to close its borders soon. No one will be able to enter the state. We must get you back here.”
“California is doing what?” My voice screeched. “I didn’t see that on the news.”
“Well, they haven’t announced it yet.”
“Then how do you know?”
“Geneva said it.”
I rolled my eyes. “And where did Geneva hear that from?”
“Doesn’t matter. I can see California doing it. I want you back here immediately.”
“Mom, I’m trying. Zora is not sure if she’ll be back. Plus, all the airlines are reducing or completely cutting flights into and out of LaGuardia and JFK.”
“What about Newark? You can go over to New Jersey—”
“Same thing, Mom.”
“But did they cancel your flight?”
“Not yet. However, I received an email from American Airlines saying I can cancel and reschedule it for a future date.”
“Then, maybe you should plan to go on your flight as usual.”
I shook my head. “The flight isn’t until next week. Who knows what will happen by then.”
“Maybe, you should just get a flight out tomorrow. If you need help, your father and I can pay. Surely, Zora will understand that you can’t dog sit anymore.”
“And what am I going to do with Ganesha? Just leave him here?”
“Give him to her brother.”
“Zora says the dog hates his girlfriend.”
“Because dogs don’t like gold diggers.”
“Mom, that’s not nice. You barely know Amber.”
“I met that Amber at Mrs. Patel’s birthday party last year and she might as well had walked in with a shovel.”
“Anyway, I’m not handing over Ganesha to Kamal and Amber.”
“So, you’ll risk your health for a dog?”
“Mom, I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying in Zora’s apartment.”
“Dear God. You’re in New York—the epicenter. Everyone’s dying over there—”
“Mom, could we just. . .chill out from the death talk right now.”
“And have you called Jason and checked on him?”
I closed my eyes. “No. I haven’t. We’re not together. Remember?”
“I still don’t understand why you two broke up. Did he cheat?”