I wake up in the arms of my uncle Joey, he’s carrying me. I’m sweaty, my cheeks feeling warm.
How long was I in that closet?
Where’s dad?
When did Joey get here?
“No, put me back, dad is going to find me.” I groan, half asleep. His dark eyes look down at me sadly, his hard arms holding me closer while he walks me down the hall and to my room. My pink walls, stuffed animals on a shelf, my vanity of hair bands and nail polishes greet me, but I feel anything but at home. My mother sits at the end of my bed, sobbing, and Joey gently places me on my pink princess bed. My mother hangs her head, one of her hands pressed against her forehead.
“What’s wrong, Mommy?” Walking on my knees, I stumble across the bed to her and she pulls me into a hug. She nestles into me like she hasn’t seen me all day and has missed me.
“We can’t find your daddy, honey, and I think he’s left us…” she cries into my shoulder, her tears making my nightgown damp. “God, I hope he’s just left and not…” My mother stops herself.
I don’t know how to think. How to act, so I just stare at her. Why would daddy leave us?
“Daddy’s in some trouble and it’s just best if he leaves for a while, he’ll be back,” Joey says in a soft voice, pulling on my arm, he gestures for me to get under the blankets. I do so and he tucks me in, chopping at the blankets around my legs to secure me in tightly.
“It’s up to you to take care of things now, my little tater tot,” he says, ruffling my hair.
“Joey!” my mother hisses, and I look to her, curious why she’s so upset with Uncle Joey for saying that. I can help around the house until daddy gets back. I don’t mind.
They stare at each other and I get the sense that this is a grown-up thing, something I don’t understand.
I suddenly feel numb and confused. Daddy is in trouble so he ran, for us or from us?
“When will he be back?” I ask, my eyes starting to water. Nobody answers me. Joey’s phone rings, and he and my mother leave me alone in my room. I glance to the balcony, the moon shining through the glass doors.
“We will put a search party together, we’ll find him. Don’t worry,” Joey tells my mother just outside my door.
Rolling over on my side, I close my eyes and push the brokenness I feel inside of me as far away as I can.
Daddy is okay.
He’s coming back.
I’ll wait for him until the day he comes back.
“I promise, daddy,” I whisper to myself, hoping wherever he is, he feels me thinking of him.
I will absolutely wait until the end of time for him to come back home.Kieran“I was never really insane except upon occasions when my heart was touched.”Edgar Allan PoeStanding in front of one of many windows that make up my loft, I stare out into the city. It’s dark out, it’s at this time that my heart comes alive and I want to go outside into the shadows. Slightly turning my head, I catch the reflection of the woman I took home earlier. Her naked ass peeks from the white sheets and I bite my bottom lip remembering how soft her skin felt against mine just hours ago. The slight scar on her hip reminds me of my own and I lift my palm, the moonlight from above giving me a clear view of my hand. When I became the underlying boss, I endured an initiation. My father brought me to an old church that I thought was abandoned and into a room where four men stood in hooded masks, a lone table with a gold dagger sat by itself, and I instantly knew what I had to do as if I had been trained my whole life for that moment. I sliced the sharp blade across my palm, droplets of my bloodlines spilling to the floor as the unknown men watched. Sirens from a fire truck down the street take me from the memory and back to the girl on my bed. She’s a good woman, too sweet. New York is the place to go for sassy little things such as herself. They come here looking for better, so naïve and heartfelt. All of them think this is the city where dreams come true. They’d have nightmares if they really knew what dwelled within the underground of New York City.
The DeAngelo family.
My family.
Which is why she beelined right for me at the bar, I always seem to attract the sweet, tender ones. As if she can hear me thinking about her, her head pops up from the pillow. Blonde silky hair framing her sharp face as she sits up, her fake tits coming into view. The sly look on her face tells me she is certainly ready for more.