Until Fools Find Gold (Providence Gold 1)

Oh no, restraint gone - it was a more intense and passionate kiss. Teeth nipping, tongues rubbing against each other that bit more roughly, and…

“Hey,” a voice yelled from behind us followed by the baying of a dog. That was the only way to describe it. Normally dogs howled, this dog - one I knew well and who whenever I looked after it kept me up at night with the same fucking noise– bayed.

Pulling away from her, we both turned to look at the asshole and his four-legged asshole’s direction, and there was my cock-blocking brother, Archer.

He was looking around, but when his eyes landed back on us, he did a double take and jumped slightly.

“You, uhhh…” he rubbed the back of his neck and looked around the area more carefully. “You been doing… things to Smurfs?”

The word things came out choked like he was trying not to laugh, confusing the shit out of me.

“Smurfs?” Luna asked, watching as his dog Bogey came running up to her.

He was a bloodhound and had the droopiest jowls in the history of canines. His ears also bitch slapped whoever he was near when he shook his head, it fucking hurt.

Pointing at his mouth, Archer nodded. “Yeah, you’ve both got something here.”

It was one of those moments when someone points at a tiny area of their mouth like the person has a crumb, when in fact most of their lower face was covered in schmutz.

Picking up a napkin, Lune did the typical ladylike dab at her mouth. When she pulled it away and saw the blue icing on it, she looked up at me and squeaked. My face must have been a sight because there was no hiding the shock when I saw her blue mouth and the dots of blue on her chin.

Fuck, that really did look bad.

I grabbed a napkin from the scattered stack on the blanket and at the same time, we wiped each other’s mouths.

Looking back over at Archer, I flinched when I came face to face, literally, with Bogey. He had a face only his mother, or Archer, could love. It was like his jowls weighed fifty pounds each and were pulling the underneath of his eyes down with their weight.

If that wasn’t bad enough, his breath smelled like a dead animal.

That death breath chose that moment to hit me making me clap my hand over my face and try to move out of its range.

“What are you doing here?” I tried to ask through my hand and not breathe at the same time.

I wasn’t a novice at this– you couldn’t avoid it, so not breathing was the only way. If you breathed through your mouth you could taste it, that’s how bad it was.

We’d taken him to five veterinary offices who had all done tests and asked their dental experts to come and look at it. Sadly, for Bogey, and for us, it was the luck of the draw. He had the breath of a bowl of assholes, terminal to all who had the misfortune to inhale it.

“Huh?” Archer asked like he couldn’t make out the words, raising his brow at me. He knew full well what I was saying, he just wanted me to remove my hand and smell his dog’s ‘analtosis’ breath, the bastard.

“Oh my god,” Luna whispered, looking at me in horror.

“It’s the dog!” I pointed at Bogey who sat down and wagged his tail.

“Stop blaming my dog for your ass,” Archer answered, smirking at me and then looking upset when Luna looked up at him.

The two faced, shit sniffing, son of a…

Thankfully, the dog chose that moment to pelt Luna with his breath. I would have laughed at the way she panicked and tried to wave it away, knowing it wouldn’t make a difference if Bogey hadn’t started shaking his head and bitch slapped me with his ears.

“Fuck off,” I snapped, gently pushing him away from me. I swear Archer had trained him to do this shit.

In fact, knowing my older brother, he probably fed him skunk spray tablets or something like that. He was the oldest out of all of us and had made our lives a living hell since we’d entered the world. He swore it was all accidental, but there were only so many times that things could be innocent.

Glaring over at him, I repeated the question that had previously been muffled by my hand and lack of oxygen. “What are you doing here?”

“Was out looking at things,” he motioned over his shoulder at the ATV that neither of us had heard. “Bogey took an interest in what was over here, so I got off and followed.” The smug smirk on his face said it all– he’d done it on purpose. Looking innocently over at Luna who was now sitting upright and watching Bogey warily, he added, “I was worried that someone might have had an accident. Are you feeling okay after not riding for so long, Luna? Should you be riding a horse with a broken foot?”