I had no idea what I was going to do tonight, but I didn’t want to go home. I peeked at James. He’d probably let me stay at his place, sneak me in right under his parents’ noses.
But that would be kind of weird.
Hearing the laughter and shouts and the steady thump of music coming from inside the house was also kind of weird after everything that had happened.
I took a drink and immediately regretted it. Fire poured down my throat and hit my nearly empty stomach.
“What’s in this drink?” I asked again, flapping one hand in front of my face.
James chuckled as water splashed over the pool patio, drawing my attention. It didn’t feel warm enough to swim, but that hadn’t stopped anyone. Neither did the lack of bathing suits. I was seeing waaay more than I ever needed to.
I sat beside his legs, to stay out of the reach of the cold water.
“A little of this and a little of that.”
I frowned. “It tastes like gasoline—gasoline on fire.”
“It’s not that bad.”
Pressing my lips together, I shook my head and then leaned over his legs, placing my cup on the table. “It’s bad.”
“You’re such a lightweight.” He knocked his foot against my hip. “Drink up.”
“Nah. I think I’ll pass.” I folded my arms in my lap. “I’m driving.”
“You could always crash here,” he suggested. “Half the people here will.”
I shook my head as my gaze crawled back to the pool. I saw April standing on the other side, her arms across her chest as her mouth appeared to be moving a mile a minute. A small group surrounded her, obviously enraptured by whatever hateful crap she was spewing.
I dragged my gaze from her, to those in the pool. So many smiling faces. It was almost like Colleen and Amanda hadn’t died. Okay. Maybe that wasn’t fair.
Or maybe they were just having fun, letting loose to remind themselves that they were very much still alive. My gaze dropped to the cup, but whatever the hell devil mix that drink was wasn’t going to prove that I was alive—that I was real and not a fraud. If I drank, it would probably make it worse.
What was I going to do?
Could I go home and go to bed, wake up tomorrow and pretend everything was okay? How could I?
“Can I ask you something?”
“Sure,” James replied.
I exhaled roughly. “What would you do if you found out you weren’t really James?”
“What?” He laughed.
It sounded stupid. “Never mind.”
He stared at me a moment and then sat up. “Like if I found out I was adopted or something?”
Yeah, no. That was not what I was going for, because this was nothing like finding out you were adopted. I would’ve been cool with that. Shocked. But cool. I lifted a shoulder.
“That’s not what you’re asking.” He dropped his feet to the patio next to mine. “You mean if I found out I wasn’t me?”
“Yeah,” I whispered.
His brows furrowed in the flickering light from a nearby tiki torch. “Why are you asking something like that?”
“I don’t know.” I feigned casual indifference. “Just something I read about online earlier. You know, one of those . . . kidnap stories.” Man, I was proud of how fast I’d come up with that. “Where a kid was taken at a young age and was basically given a whole new identity.”
“Oh.” He scrunched his fingers through his hair. “I guess I would want to figure out who I was and why I was taken. I’d hope there’d be a good reason for it. Not something creepy.” He paused. “Though I doubt there’s ever a non-creepy reason for taking a child.”
I hadn’t been taken.
I’d been given away . . . to be saved.
Swallowing hard, I let my head fall back. The stars were out in full force, blanketing the sky. Somewhere up there was where the Luxen had come from. Crazy.
“Evie?”
I sucked in a sharp breath and then shook out my shoulders. “Yeah?”
“Are you okay?”
“I’m perfect. Just in a weird mood.” Time to get moving before I did something stupid, like blurting out everything, for example. I stood, needing to use the bathroom. “I’ll be back.”
“You better.”
Waving my hand, I turned and made my way around the pool and across the deck, entering the back of the house. The kitchen was packed, and the air was sticky, smelling of perfume and spilled beer.
Coop’s parties were popular, so people were everywhere. I had no idea what his parents did for a living, but they were never home on the weekends, and their house was huge. Unfortunately, there was a line for the downstairs bathroom, so I crossed what I thought was a marble floor and held on tight to the railing as I climbed a set of stairs.
I wasn’t at all surprised to see that the upstairs hallway wasn’t vacant. I turned sideways and slid past a couple who looked like they were literally seconds away from making a baby right then and there, and two girls who appeared to be on the verge of vomiting all over the place. Yikes.