Some Like it Hotter

Fun-loving Eva still just wanted fun.

14

WAS IT RUDE to tell your wildly happy roommate and her equally delirious boyfriend to shut the hell up?

Eva lay on Chris’s bed, one arm dangling over the side of the mattress, the other bent resting over her face.

Giggle, giggle. Talk, talk. And the worst? The silences.

Spit was being mingled.

Disgusting.

She hoped they both came down with severe cases of—

No, she didn’t. She was happy for Natalie and Tom, genuinely happy. And also whiny and envious. But Eva’s time would come. Maybe Mr. Right would walk into Slow Pour the day she got back. Or she’d sit next to him on the plane next week. Or maybe she’d coast through another year and a half and marry Zac. Their life together would be fun and easy. After knowing Ames, she could now see how there would always be something missing. But at least Eva had discovered an important part of her character during this past month.

She could fall in love.

And she couldn’t handle it.

Why? Where had this defect come from? Who knew? Maybe she should go into therapy and see if she could dig up some reason. Her parents hadn’t had the most passionate relationship, but they were certainly fond of each other and seemed content. Maybe like her—before she knew Ames—they’d never stumbled over a deeper love. Or maybe they had. Maybe they’d met other people earlier in their lives who set their souls on fire and had sensibly known to avoid the perils of burning up too quickly. In that case, Eva would for once be the apple who’d stayed near the tree.

Either way, didn’t matter. When Ames had been talking about Eva staying in New York past the appointed date, she’d frozen like a cornered animal, instinct screaming no, no, no, no! What could she do? Her instinct was a good deal wiser than she was and she’d always trusted it before this. Why stop now?

Poor Ames. She didn’t want to hurt him. She adored him! Being able to accompany him last night into that totally intimidating restaurant peopled by totally intimidating glitterati, and not only manage but do really well, connect with people and not embarrass him or herself—she’d been giddy. And grateful for the chance to prove to them, and most of all to herself, that she was not the sum of her outfits. Back at Ames’s condo, she’d been madly in love and on top of the world.

Until he’d asked her to stay longer. And the world had bucked her off. Obviously she’d been kidding herself that she might have changed. Chris was right. Love was still a game to her. Life was a game to her. She wasn’t cut out for a serious, passionate and intimate relationship, no matter how different her feelings for Ames had seemed.

Her cell rang on the mattress next to her. Chris.

Oh, no. Talking to her sister would just torture her with reminders of her cowardice and failings. She’d told Ames she couldn’t even ask if Chris had any interest in staying longer in Carmia. It was beyond her. Even for another few weeks. Even to please a man she’d thought she was in love with. Even though her sister would probably say no and the whole thing would be a nonissue.

Eva answered the call. She’d talk to Chris. She wasn’t that pathetic. She hoped.

“Hey, Chris.”

“Hey...you napping?”

“No.”

“Sick?”

“No.”

“In that case, I’m worried. What is happening?”

“Oh, nothing. I crushed Ames’s heart last night and I feel like a total jerk.”

Her sister gasped. “Oh, no, Eva. The dinner was a disaster?”

“No.” Eva laughed bitterly. Oh, the irony. “The dinner was a fabulous success. I dressed appropriately and talked coffee the way they talk wine and we all got along fine.”

“Fabulous, good for you! I bet Ames was happy... Wait, but now apparently he’s not?”

“Nope.”

Chris started whistling a random tune. “Seriously, any time you want to tell me is fine, I’ll just amuse myself here alone until you do.”

Eva sighed and rolled over onto her stomach, cheek resting on the bedspread. “I need to work up the courage. Tell me what’s going on with you first.”

“Oh. I don’t know if you want to hear it.”